Sunday, December 31, 2006

Need your weight loss secrets!!!

I am determined to make 2007 my year. Even though my life is out of control much of the time, there is no need to ignore myself. I need to take care of myself, for me and for my children. What are your goals for 2007? What are your secrets to a healthy lifestyle??? What do you do to lose/maintain your weight. I am pretty good at losing, and I suck big time at maintaining. I need a lifestyle change, not a diet. My secrets for past success in losing weight are:
  • Plan what I eat/write it down
  • Keep track using WW points or calories
  • No snacking out of bags/boxes!!
  • Portion control!
  • Minimal sweets (when I start I can't stop!)
  • Drink tea when I feel hungry between meals
  • Eat 3 meals and one snack, no skipping meals
  • Don't undereat, I will binge if I am too hungry
  • Don't eat after dinner
  • Don't eat off kids plates!

I could use some eating out tips, as I am terrible at restaurants. I love food, I love the smells and tastes of food. If I am at a restaurant and faced with the low fat grilled chicken or the yummy buffalo chicken wrap I am going to chose the latter. Luckily we don't go out a lot, but I can gain a few pounds in one meal out, seriously!!! I also am bad in social situations. At parties, I am faced with so many good foods and I can't say no. I am SO bad at that. I love my food. I love all kinds of food. I love chips/salty food, sweets, snacks, meat, everything. I just can't have a lot of that kind of food in my house and I do pretty well at home it is other places that I break down. So, if you have any advice let me know!!!! I tell people that it is a miracle I am not very overweight I like food that much. I sometimes even say I have an obsession with it, and could very well become a binge eater if I let myself. I think at times in my life I have been.

Have a happy new year and stay safe! I am staying home with my family tonight and watching movies. We are getting lots of snow here, so it is very pretty! A nice way to bring in the new year.

Friday, December 29, 2006

Christmas Wrapup

The big day is now over and now on to normal life again!! I love Christmas, don't get me wrong, but I also like getting back to our normal routine. Although we won't be back to normal until next week and the kids return to school. We had a nice holiday. Low key, not too overboard. We really cut back on gifts this year, and so did the grandparents, who usually go way overboard. It was great. I don't have too many toys to find places for in our house. B got his beloved gameboy. Yes, he loves his video games. We had told him he probably wouldn't get one, but then Santa decided to get it for him on the condition that he continues to do well in school and works on his handwriting. (he has been writing very messy lately on his school work). He also got some clothes, small lego set, and star wars figures. Some of the grandparent presents are staying in their packages until a later date. He also got a couple movies, which we will watch later. J's favorite gift is the triplet dolls she got from my parents. I got her the stroller to go with them. It is funny, these dolls don't do anything, don't cry or move or anything. They are very simple and cute. She loves these dolls!! She also got a princess computer, clothes, movies, and a cute princess chair from my brother. I forgot to add that B got a VideoNow player, which I'm not sure how much he will use, and a MP3 player from my brother!! He has no idea what an MP3 player is, so now I have one to use! I've been wanting one so it will be fun to have. I got some money and that is about it. We don't do presents for the adults in the family since it is basically just exchanging money. We may use some of our money to pay for my tuition/books (boring) and do something fun as a family. We all saw the movie "Night at the Museum" last week and that was fun. I'd like to do something else while we are all on break. Not sure what though. We need to save the money for things we really need.

I'm back on the weight loss bandwagon AGAIN. Gets pretty old going back and forth. Makes me so depressed. But I guess going back and forth is better than gaining and gaining and gaining and not doing anything about it. At least I do something about it some of the time :) I am not sure how I will fit any exercise into my life. I thought about looking into the Anytime Fitness place here in town but I know that we can't afford another monthly payment as much as I should do it for myself. I seem to only do well when I can walk outside (like this summer when I was down to an all time low weight). I hate the bike I have in the basement. It was my dads from the 70's. SO OLD and so boring and I hate it. I would love a treadmill but can't afford that. I hate work out tapes. I have tried many and I just can't stick with them. I've heard of something that is like a slider workout. You put these sliding discs on your feet and do some tape or something. I will have to check that out, but I really don't want to put money into anything since my past record shows that it doesn't pan out. I'm just starting better eating today and we'll see about the exercise and how I can work that in. Depressing!
I found the website, anyone hear of these???

Sunday, December 24, 2006

Merry Christmas!

As Christmas eve is upon us, I try to focus on the important things this holiday season. My 2 beautiful and healthy children. My husband who I stand with together through our journey in life. My home, food, clothes. My dog, who got hit by a car last week and lives to tell about it (she came out of it without an injury to speak of!). Makes me appreciate the little things. My kids being hyper this morning, talking non stop. Watching them separate their presents, examining them just like I did as a kid. The excitement of them placing their last advent sticker this morning. The fresh snow that gives us a white Christmas. This year, we almost didn't have one! Making a snowman with the kids, and having hot chocolate and cider. Making Christmas cookies and making our plate for santa tonight. All the things I love about my life are with me today. I celebrate the birth of Jesus, and my family. I couldn't be luckier in my life and even though I don't always feel that way, I am a fortunate person to have what I do have. I only wish that everyone in the world was as lucky as I am. Peace to all!!!

Friday, December 22, 2006

I got an interview!!!

For the summer intern position. It is after the first of the year, so I have some time before I have to stress about it! I am thankful to be given the opportunity, even if I don't get a position it will be good practice. I have nothing to wear to a business interview. It has been like 9 years since I've had an interview. Luckily, I've been though some pretty rigorous interviews in my college days so I think I'm somewhat prepared for an intense interview (if it is intense). I usually don't get too nervous about these things.

On another note, we are all on break/vacation now. Feels great! Kids are playing downstairs and we plan on a movie tomorrow. Happy holidays!

Thursday, December 21, 2006

Christmas time!

The anticipation for Christmas has peaked around here. The kids are looking forward to the holiday. They eagerly put on their advent stickers each morning, and count down to how many days are left. They know all about the religious aspect of Christmas but I suspect that the gifts under the tree have a little something to do with their excitement. We had J's program at preschool yesterday afternoon. How cute it is to see all those 4/5 yr olds singing holiday songs. They all lined up and did their little dances and songs and were cute as can be. J did really well and looked very adorable in her red and white dress with a bun in her hair. She is one of the littler/younger kids. She looked at me throughout the whole program. I gave her a thumbs up sign, and she did it back to me with a little wink. What a character she is. I went with my parents, niece, and husband. She had quite the crowd watching her. The pastor of the church then read the Christmas story to the kids and they had a little gift exchange. It was a nice time. B had pajama day in school today. Most of the public schools around here don't celebrate a specific holiday, which I guess is fine by me. It would be fun if they got to, but he doesn't know any different I guess. The pajamas are excitement enough.

I am just about done shopping. I had to buy some lotion for great grandma. She is out, according to MIL and so I picked that up this morning. I got the kid's gifts from us wrapped last night (2 toys and one gift of clothes each). I now have to just wrap the Santa gifts on Sunday night (2 toys and stocking stuffers). Sounds like my parents got the kids some nice gifts, they will be so excited. B has specific things he has been asking for. J really doesn't have anything specific she wants. She likes everything. B wants a Gameboy, star wars legos, star wars figures, and a light saber. J just likes anything to do with babies or dolls and coloring/drawing. They both like games but I don't think they are getting any this year (they have a ton of board games).

The weather here is not too great today. We have had freezing rain all morning and afternoon. I've been watching for school closings on TV. It looks pretty bad. I am hoping for some snow this weekend. The weather has been very mild for December which is nice but the kids really want some snow to play in!

Wishing you all a very happy holiday!

Tuesday, December 19, 2006


I am on holiday break. My final last night was pretty hard but I got a 90%. I ended up with a 93.8% overall in the class. You need a 92% to get an A, so I am VERY HAPPY!! I now am going to do NO school for for at least 2 weeks. Then I have to start up the studying, since we have a test our first weekend back (no fair!). I am looking forward to some relaxation!

Monday, December 18, 2006

Almost on break

In 4 hr and 20 minutes I will be starting my last test of my first semester of nursing school. I am 1/4 of the way through this hellish journey!! I know in the end I will be a stronger and different person than I am now. I say "hellish" but I know that this is a life changing 2 years for me. It will define me in a different way, and will challenge me in more ways than I ever knew possible. It will beat me down and lift me up. I have had many emotions over the last 4 months. I have felt joy and sadness and pain and exhaustion. I have felt guilt and elation. I will never forget the patients I cared for, or the nurses who taught me. I have made friends and I have probably made some enemies too! I have taught my kids that I can work hard and sometimes I won't always be only a "mommy". They have learned to spend more time with their dad (good thing). Up until now I have only been their mom. I worked part time when B was little but I don't think he remembers much about that time. They have a hard time imagining me working! They ask if they will have to go to daycare. Hopefully not much, I tell them. I am going to be a nurse so I can work when you are sleeping or when your daddy is home. I want to help other people get well, I tell them. They seem to understand. J says she wants to be a doctor when she gets big (oh, and a beeper at Tar*et). B wants to be a paleontologist, president and a police officer. All P's he tells me!

I am off to study for another 1.5 hours until the kids get home from school, and then I will post again with my grade when I find out.

I can't wait until I can spend my vacation with the ones I hold most dear....

Tuesday, December 12, 2006

4 1/2 yr old separation anxiety

My very outgoing independent 4 1/2 yr old is having trouble separating lately. This is really hard for me because she has always loved new places and people, and I have never worried leaving her anywhere. Granted, I am a SAHM and with her a lot but she went to preschool all last year with no issues at all. She has also gone to church school since last year and MOPS all of this year so far. She goes on playdates and has had babysitters. She just started having issues after thanksgiving. She will get upset when the carpool comes and some tears will fall. She gets over it pretty quick but I still feel horrible. I try to reassure her and be confident saying goodbye but now I'm starting to get anxious about things we have planned that involve her separating. Tomorrow we have MOPS in the AM and preschool in the afternoon, and I have school at night so it will be a hard day. Anyone else have this issue with an older preschooler???

Monday, December 11, 2006


One test left!

I am going into the last final pretty good. I still will probably study as much as I can this week and this time next week I'll be on break!!! Yippee!!!!

Sunday, December 10, 2006

Feelin' Blue.....

Not sure what is up with me. I am not feeling myself lately. Since Thanksgiving time at least. I am feeling lazy, drowsy, unmotivated, sluggish, fat. I know it is partially due to stress of finals. I have been staying up late every night and will have to for another week. I have one final tomorrow night and one the next week. However, next weekend we are supposed to go to DH's work party, 4 hr away, overnight. So, that means no studying on Sat or Sunday most likely until we get home later Sunday. I will lose out on a lot of study time. Which means I have to do all my studying this week. During the week. And I am burned out. I should be studying now. I am tired. All the weight I lost this summer/fall has returned. I am now back to about 130 lb. I am eating horrible. I have no motivation to cook or go to the grocery store. I just eat whatever is around and handy. Terrible. I am not eating fruits or veggies much at all. I am eating way to much processed food. It is making me feel horrible. But why do I do it to myself??? I have no idea. I just know that I am only finishing my first of 4 semesters of school. I sometimes ask myself at times like this how I will get thru it. How I will handle the stress. I can't be everythings for everyone all the time. I want to be a good student, and a good mother, and a good wife, and a good daughter and friend. I want a clean house and healthy meals on the table for dinner. I want my bed to be made every day. I want to keep up with my hobbies. I want to exercise (what's that???). I work with patients every time I'm in the hospital who are at the end of their lives and I know that my life is going way to fast. I want to make the best of it, and be happy, and feel in control. I don't want regrets. I want to be happy about the mark I've made in my life and the things I've accomplished. I want to make a difference. I want to put myself first but I always put myself last. Dead last. I never ask for help. I never hire a babysitter because it cost too much and J will cry (she cries with separation now, at 4 1/2, after never having a problem ever with it...). I don't know if I need medical help. I think that I am just feeling down and it will most likely pass. I just don't know how to feel fullfilled in life when I feel like I am pulled a million different directions. I am just babbling at this point and I am going to get back to my books but it feels good to get it out. Here's to a better tomorrow.

Thursday, December 07, 2006

I am such a bad blogger

I am terrible at this blogging thing. I am not sure why. God knows I'm on the computer enough. I mean, how hard would it be to type up a quick entry every day or even every other day. I don't know why I don't. I hate it when I read blogs and they never post anything new. And I do the same thing!!! Must get better at blogging!

Not much new here. Feeling burnt out from school. Feeling the Christmas rush. I went to the store this week and it was a madhouse. People everywhere searching for their Xmas gifts, food, etc. The lines were horrendous. The craziness of the season is here in full force. I actually enjoy most of Christmas. I like to buy gifts and find/make that special thing for people. I do not have a lot of people to buy for. I have our parents, the kids, girlfriends (we draw a name for our annual Xmas party - this sunday!) , teachers, and our 2 grandma's. I sometimes need a little something for someone but I don't really have to buy too much. I know some people who have to buy like 30 gifts. That is CRAZY!! Why not draw names?? Our siblings do not exchange gifts with each other (yay!) and so we save the money for ourselves. I also do some buying for charity each year. We always do Operation Christmas Child boxes, a boy and a girl one. We got those done at least a month ago. We usually just put a few small toys, some necessities like soap etc, and some hard candy. The MOPS club sponsered a family and I picked out 2 turtlenecks for the mom. B's class is also sponsering a family so today I got a small toy for the 2 kids and some bath products for the mom. I enjoy spending some money on families that really need it. The most fun for me is finding gifts for the kids. Don't get me wrong, they do not get much. But I do make sure they get what they really like and want. I get them each probably 2 Santa gifts, and 1-2 gifts from us. I also get some fun stocking stuff. B will get some star wars stuff and J some doll stuff and a princess computer. I might have to try to find the G.I. Joe figures B is wanting but they are older and I'm not sure I can find them anymore. Oh, I also made wine charms for my girlfriends and for others I need a small gift for. (neighbors, etc). I am not done with all of them but I got about 8 sets of 4 made. So easy and so cute too! We got our tree up last week, a real one too! DH surprised me with getting one when I was at school. We got lights all over, from the living room to each kids' room! They love it, staring at the lights as they drift off!! We haven't done any baking since I'm too busy with school still. I have 2 finals then a month off. CAN'T WATI!!!!!

Friday, December 01, 2006

Start of another busy weekend

School weekend again. My last one this semester. I have to go to the hospital tonight and get my info, then we are going out to dinner for my mom's birthday. I then have to get the kids to bed and start on my care plan. I will most likely be up past midnight and will be getting up around 5am. Not fun, especially since I'm not a morning person. I should work on my work rather than go to dinner but it is my mom, and it will be fine. Then hospital Sat from 6:45-3, then school Sun from 8-5. We are doing our group presentation and there are 10 groups. 20-25 min each so that is a full day. We are doing ours on the Russian culture. Then I have a paper and the care plan due monday. Then I will be studying for finals!! Home stretch!
Have a great weekend!