Frigid

I am still around, still alive up here in the frigid north. I am telling you, it has been below zero degree for most of the last week, and with windchill it is about -3o, no lie. It is cold. So cold that you don't even want to step outside. Getting the kids ready for school is a chore because they have to get so bundled up and we can't walk and have to drive in every day. I drop them off right at the door so they don't have to be out long. And then they don't get to have outdoor recess so the whole school is full of kids with all their pent up energy. I'm hoping for a warm front soon, even something above 0 would feel warm right now!
Christmas is coming so soon and I still have a few gifts to buy. I have to wrap and prepare the kids gifts. I have to work 4 hours on xmas eve and 8 hr xmas day. I am a little bummed but I am off at 3pm on xmas eve and that is the day we do most of our celebrating. I also know that next year I will have it off! YAY! It helps that I get paid a lot extra to work that day, and I can pay for most of the gifts we bought just by working one day.
I have been busy with work and wrestling season has started. I am the team photographer so I'm busy with that. We have tournaments each weekend and always on the go! I am trying to find something to keep J busy, piano maybe or gymnastics. She really is happy just being at home with me when she isn't at school. She loves school but likes being with mom too! B is loving being with his wrestling buds again. He is growing so fast, almost 8 yr old.
Wishing everyone a happy holiday!

America has spoken

I am beyond happy with the election results. I waited anxiously for months for this day. Never have I been so excited about a presidential candidate. I have always voted. I have always tried to be informed about politics. However, I have never CARED as much as I do today. I have never been so nervous and excited about an election. I have been an Obama supporter from the very earliest days of his campaign. I never considered the alternative. Maybe I'm stuck in my ways, but I'm a true democrat at heart and always will be. Yes, I voted for Gore and Kerry but I never felt as much hope as I do now for Barack Obama. I finally feel like we have a truly good person in the white house. A good man, a good leader. I have nothing against John McCain. I think he is a good man also. I think he has worked hard, and served his country. I would only want the best for either candidate if they won. I would never have voted for him, but I don't have anything against him (well maybe the Palin selection but that is another post!) Anyway, the night is over and I'm looking forward to a new tomorrow. Obama has brought hope to so many and we may be on our way to a brighter future. God Bless America!!!

hello! Happy Halloween!

We might have a "nice" weather halloween this year for once. It is in the 60's I believe, probably 50's by tonight. But much better than the frigid weather we have most years. I am looking forward to a fun night and am happy and grateful to have work off. J is going to be a witch and B a demon type creature. This is the first year he really wanted something kind of scary. Hope he doesn't scare the little kids. J has a parade at school in an hour or so, she is a cat. They had to dress up like a story book character. They can't actually celebrate "halloween" (dumb) so the younger kids do this up to 1st grade. B is too old now I guess... :(
Not much too exciting in our lives. I am still working hard and bringing in a paycheck sure is nice. I now make money to cover my monthly credit card bill and most of the house payment. It feels good. Hubby changed his job also to be an independent contractor rather than working for his employer so he is making more per hour as well. So, hopefully in the future we can save up a little more, and have a little extra for things such as trips etc. I really want to build a house someday but with the housing market that isn't looking promising for a while.
We finished up football and have a couple more basketball games left. Then wrestling starts Dec 1. J may take up gymnastics this winter. I've been doing aerobics classes this week and am so sore. It feels good but reminds me that I really should stay active on a regular basis. I'm going to try not to eat too much chocolate tonight.
Wish me luck.
Happy Halloween!!!

Update

I am getting ready to go to bed after a long week of being a single parent. Hubby gets home tomorrow night, after being gone an entire week. I worked 2 days since he's been gone and have been lucky enough to have my parents help out. But I'm exhausted. I just don't sleep well alone and plus with staying up late for work 2 nights and getting up early for school I just am sleep deprived. I don't ever nap either. I should, but there is never enough time. I have so many other things I need to do.
J has a field trip tomorrow and I am really kind of sad because I didn't get picked to go. Only 5 parents were allowed to go and I wasn't chosed from the drawing. I have gone on every field trip of the kids except one for B (also didn't get chosen!) and I just feel like something is missing. I think she is ok with it but we will see tomorrow. I can tell she is a little nervous but she hasn't cried or anything. She seems to be looking forward to it, but she is a creature of routine and this will be out of her normal comfort zone. Plus, my kids walk to school so she isn't used to the bus. I'm hoping and praying it goes well for both of us. I'm sure I'll be a nervous wreck all day not being with my baby.
B is done with football and enjoying some time off to just hang out and play with friends. Wrestling starts in December. He loves to play with friends every day and is such a social kid.
My job is going ok. I am starting to feel like the honeymoon is over and reality is setting in. I am nervous to be on my own (in a month or less) and have not felt confident lately. I'm hoping that in time that feeling goes away. I know all new RN's go through these feelings but it is hard.
Today I spent way too much money. Got both kids winter coats at Old Navy. I was not thinking last spring to buy some while on clearance. Oh well. They seem to be of good quality and may last 2 years. I have to get boots for B. I did find some for J on clearance last year. My requirement is that they have a removable inside. I will probably spend at least $30 on those. I have to make sure I have snowpants for both kids also.
I also bought myself a pair of black lined suede boots. I have a brown pair I wore a lot last year and know I'll wear these. They were $30 at Target. Not terribly expensive but more than I like to spend on really anything!! But I really know I will use them and they will match my winter coats. They are just so warm and cozy I wear them everywhere.
I have tomorrow off. I am meeting a friend to do a scrapbooking calendar class. I also have to pay some bills, clean up around the house, and watch the debate. I've worked every other debate so this will be my first one I get to watch. Looking forward to it, even though they never seem to give any straight answers. I got my Obama sign and t-shirt delivered this week. I was thinking they were not going to come as orders are backed up but just in time to get some use out of them a couple weeks. I put the sign up a couple days ago, and I think I'm the only one with an Obama sign in my neighborhood. Not many people have up presidential signs but the ones I've seen are all McCain. We live in a pretty conservative area I guess. I also heard that you can't wear any t-shirts etc to the polls or they won't let you vote? Any truth to that?? I probably wouldn't anyway, but that is interesting.
Almost midnight, so good night!

Election

Well, election time is just around the corned. I'm really sick of the ads on TV. I would totally respect any candidate who would just refuse to sink to that level of "he did this, she did this, this person is the worst person in the whole world, how could you ever vote for him/her". I don't even pay attention anymore. Hate it.
Anyway, I'm a total Obama voter. Nothing will change my mind. I have been a fan of his ever since he first started to be known. I seriously am wishing and praying he wins. I don't dislike McCain or Palin, I just don't see anything in them that would make me vote for them. I think they all have their faults, as we all do. And all we can do is try to make the best choice and vote. EVERYONE NEEDS TO VOTE!!!!
I'm anxiously awaiting voting day and you should be too!

My beautiful kids

Sometimes I just have to sit back and remind myself to slow down and treasure the moments. My kids are growing so fast before my eyes. It sometimes is hard to remember when they were babies, toddlers, even preschoolers. They are just developing into these wonderful little people. Jenna is 6 now and I love how independent she is becoming. She still definately loves her momma but she goes to school every day and is doing so well. She is a highly emotional kid who thrives on routine, consistency, and limits. She needs boundaries and a place to let go (home). She is able to behave really well at school but her outlet is home where she sometimes has to have a little "break down" or emotional time. I am proud of how well she does and how she follows rules and listens. She can be challenging as she likes things a certain way "her way" and she doesn't always get that. She is probably the most inflexible member of our family (somewhat like her father!). She has the loudest voice and most demanding personality. But all these things make her my girl. She is almost everything I am not. This is what keeps me on my toes. Despite her challenges, she is loving to the point of wanting to be next to me as much as possible. I sometimes call her "shadow" due to her always being with me. She loves to draw, play with dolls and friends, and read. She admires her big brother, even when he doesn't want her to. She is such a sweet and loving child!

Bret is 8 and has transitioned to wanting his mom to keep her distance (especially at school). He is so funny in that if I am at the school he will look at me out of the corner of his eye and give me a little wave but nothing too dramatic. Luckily, he is still ok with me volunteering at school and even asked me to have lunch with him last week. We aren't yet to the age where I'm too embarassing!! Bret is a passionate child whose brain is always working. He is always thinking of things and planning. He loves books and usually has a couple favorites that he is looking at. He isn't necessarily a big reader but he loves intricate illustrations and studying them. His favorite are monsters, dragons, and Where's Waldo books. He told me "I bet that illustrator is really proud of these drawings!". His personality is more like mine, laid back. Not much bothers Bret and he goes with the flow. Change is ok with him and he does not get upset, even at times he should! He loves to play with his peers and they can spend hours playing in the backyard. He also loves video games and the computer. He is active in sports but also likes downtime at home. He is such a smart kid, and funny too. I just love both of my kids so much and wish I could bottle them up at each age so I could go back and just remember.

So sorry

I finally remembered that I have a blog. My brian is full to the brim and some things have just been forgotten. With kids school, work, sports, housework, etc I have been more than busy. Good busy. Work is going great. I have a really busy week coming up. Last week was pretty easy (3 day shifts for training). This week I have one day of training and many days on the floor. I am now ACLS (Advanced Cardiac Life Support) certified, and in another week I will (hopefully) be PALS (Pediatric Advanced Life Support) certified. I have to pass both written and practical exams to get the card. It is a lot of reading, studying, etc but at least very practical stuff that I can use on the job. I also will be taking a TNCC (Trauma Nurse Core Course) in the future. I also have classes on RN orientation, and many others. It is so much to learn. I still am happy with where I am and hopefully where I am going!
The kids are doing great in school. They are back into the swing of things and no big issues. J still would prefer me not to work but she is handling things great. She loves school and has started basketball. Her first game was yesterday it was very entertaining!! She lost her first tooth Thursday night, she was so excited. The tooth fairy brought $5 and a cute note!
B has had lots of homework and that isn't his favorite but he is doing great. I can't believe he is in 3rd grade. He is the quarterback on his football team, the Green Machines! They have only won one game but he is doing such a great job. We are so proud of him. He also wrestles on Sunday nights and will start back with full time wrestling in December. His best subject is probably spelling, he hasn't missed one word this year. His memory for facts is also really great. He is such a smart kid.
Both of my kids just are the best!!!
My husband is out of town until last Tuesday night so we have a busy couple of days ahead of us. We will get through it with a smile if I can help it!

Scrapbooking...without the mess.....

I don't even know what it is called....online scrapbooking??? Digital scrapbooking??? I just know that I am interested in starting to scrapbook my pictures on the computer using some type of website or program that will also print my pages for me (and send them) so I can stop the guilt about my lack of scrapbooking. I have figured out that I really like the creative side but am getting bogged down with all the supplies, paper, mess, plus hauling it around is just really difficult. I do have a lot of scrapbooking supplies so I'm not sure I want to give it up completely but I just get discouraged when I'm so far behind and not feeling that creative energy. I don't know if doing it on the computer will be any easier but I think that it will be for me. I know I've heard of sites that you can get free kits and I supposed you need photoshop or something to help put the pages together, then they will print it and send it to you for a fee. Has to be cheaper than buying all the supples to make a page.

I am a member of snapfish and I know they have books you can make but I'm thinking something with a few more options and layouts.

Can anyone help me get started? What are the basics I need?? I am just lost as to where to begin.....

Real Life RN

It is so weird to be a real RN now. I think back to all the years of classes. The General Biology, the General Psych, then finally entering nursing school. The nervous anxiety of clinical days, the first time I took someone's vital signs. I remember the transition from first year to second year student. How I felt more confident but still "just" a student nurse. I felt as though I would never be one of those "real" nurses, who had the RN behind their name. Who could make decisions and take care of patients on their own. Well, I have arrived. I am a real nurse now. I am responsible for my patients and have my own license on the line now. I am able to take out medications on my own and give them without an instructor or preceptor with me. No one checks to make sure I have the right medication or that I am verifying the right patient. I am all on my own (I still have a preceptor but she lets me do things independently a LOT). It is nervewracking and cool all at once. I check things a million times because the last thing I want is an error. I question myself and I ask questions. I sometimes have to tell myself I can do this, I earned this, I know what I am supposed to do and I just have to DO it. I am smart enough and I am a good critical thinker. I don't know if I'll ever get past the fact that I have people's lives in my hands. Being an emergency room nurse has it's own set of challenges and obstacles. As a new RN it is a scary place. It forces me to think fast, and to make decisions. It forces me to use all of my skills and learn what I need to know to be a safe nurse. It is a very steep learning curve but I think I'm up to the task.

Filler

A. Attached or single? Married
B. Best friend? My husband and my 6 best girlfriends who I have known forever.
C. Cake or pie? Pie
D. Day of choice? Friday
E. Essential items? computer, car, makeup, cute purse, comfy shoes
F. Favorite color? Red
G. Gummy bears or worms? Neither
H. Hometown? Larger size suburb of Minneapolis, MN
I. Favorite indulgence? Chocolate, pizza, restaurant food, french fries
J. January or July? July
K. Kids? 2
L. Life Isn't Complete Without? my family and home
M. Marriage date? October 24 (10 years this year!)
N. Number of brothers or sisters? 2 brothers
O. Oranges or apples? Apples, honeycrisp are my favorite for the few months they are available
P. Phobias? Clausterphobia
Q. Quotes? not really
R. Reasons to smile? Watching my kids
S. Season of Choice? fall
T. Tag 5 people. Anyone who reads this blog (all 3 people!)
U. Unknown fact about me. I don't have any secrets! Can't think of anything unknown.
V. Vacation of choice? Anywhere tropical, with an ocean
W. Worst habit? I bite my nails
X. X-ray or Ultrasound? what kind of questions is this???
Y. Your favorite food? PF Changs orange chicken, california rolls, anything with chocolate
Z. Zodiac sign? Aries

List of random thoughts

I am so tired and just can't get everything done in time for work tomorrow early in the morning.

• I have to get the kids up by 6:30 to get them to daycare by 7:15
• DH is gone, this is why I am doing daycare drop off early the next few days
• My kids don't like to get up that early
• Luckily they like going to daycare!
• I have to work 4 days this week, more than I typically will work and more than I want to
• I have EKG class mon, and welcome days on the floor Tues-Thur
• I had a great girls weekend
• The kids behaved for grandma and uncle/aunt
• However, J (as usual) started acting up for me almost imediately
• Luckily, I handled it in stride and the night ended well with both kids sound asleep in minutes
• It cost $70 to have the dog in the kennel from fri-sun. This seems excessive.
• I did not finish my EKG homework for tomorrow
• I have not put away the laundry from friday
• I have not unpacked
• I have spent too much time checking email and facebook
• I need to get to get my clothes ready for tomorrow
• I think I will eat in the cafeteria rather than pack a lunch
• I am feeling very lazy
• I did not do anything all weekend except watch movies, drink cocktails, go boating, lay in the sun, read magazines, and make jewelry and cards
• I'm off to bed, 'night!

yes, still alive

I have been a working woman since July 28, and wow have I been busy. It doesn't help that I'm not used to getting up in the early hours of the morning (why I took an evening position!) and all this training is quite early. I had to be up around 5am 2 days this week due to a long commute to a training center and having to be there at 7am. I'm beat.
I am heading out for girls weekend tomorrow. It hasn't been easy to arrange as my husband got called out of town yesterday for work unexpectedly, so I had to find childcare last minute. Luckily my mom is taking them 1 night and my brother the next. I go away one weekend every summer with my 6 best friends. I have known them since I was a kid and we still are the best of friends. It is great. So, having worked all week, I am busy today getting myself and the kids ready for the weekend. I really need to get some rest tonight.
Sorry so short but things are going well. Work is good, kids are good, I am good.

Facebook

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1067950299

I joined facebook a few weeks back (or months?) and just recently started playing around. It is kind of fun. I have found a few old faces, which is always neat.

Our summer is so busy right now. Baseball playoffs, VBS, football camp, birthdays, my job, DH traveling for work, and fitting in millions of playdates. My kids LOVE playdates with a passion. It is hard to find one every day though. They just love their friends.

I am about to deep clean my house, it is a mess.

I'm back...!!!!

My computer has been on the fritz and I had not had the motivation to log on to another computer but I figured I better update my blog. Not much is going on around here. Summer is slip sliding away as it always does. We have spent lots of time at our camper, on the boat, tubing, having lots of fun. I've spent lots of time with the kids and in a week I will be a working mom once again. I am excited, nervous, terrified, and happy about my new job. Some days I can't wait, and some days I don't want my start date to come! I know all will work out just fine.

The kids are doing great. We had Jenna's birthday party last Friday. I have to post all about my big 6 year old. We had a small party at the house, it went great. Bret is finishing up baseball season and they both go to VBS next week.

Sorry to be so brief but have lots to do today. I will post again soon!

forgetful

I seriously forget about blogging. I check other people's blogs but never think to update mine. What is my problem? I actually have time to blog now, and I am blogging less than ever. I am listening to my newly uploaded itunes right now, the kiddos are asleep, DH is on his way to a work meeting out of town, and I'm soon going to be in the shower and then sleeping soundly for at least 7 hours. We were at the camper this weekend and it was a nice time. We spent some time at the beach and I went tubing with my 2 kids and their cousin who is 10. We have a big 4 person tube and they just loved it, wanting to go faster and faster while I was wantin!g to go slower and slower! The weather was awesome. Sunny and warm and my tan is coming along nicely (yes I do wear sunscreen but still my skin just tans anyway!) This week we have t-ball and baseball on Mon and Wed and I am getting together with a friend and her 2 girls wed afternoon. I also am going to be spending time planning the wrestling float for the parade this sat. I kind of am in charge of that and I have never done anything like it ever in my life. Help me! We are just mainly trying to promote the wrestling club so we are doing flyers and candy. We have a trailer and an ATV to pull it but do not have any idea how to decorate it. I have balloons and crepe streamers in our colors and that is it. We are looking for the old banner to carry and my neighbor has a die cut machine to make big letters so we may make some cool signs to put on the float. I am trying to round up kids to hand out candy and be on the float. It really is going to be a lot of busy work this week. Hoping for a nice day saturday for the parade and carnival. Tooth fairy has to make an appearance tonight. B lost another baby tooth. She is out of cash so she had to find some gold dollar coins and make a coupon for a free book. She is also leaving a cute letter. J has yet to lose a tooth but B didn't lose any until 1st grade so she is sticking to that schedule I think. Anyway, I'm dead tired. Good night!

Time

For the first time in a LONG time, I have TIME. Time to just sit back, relax, and enjoy my life. I have to admit I feel a little lost. I am ok with that and am learning to adjust to having nothing pressing to do. I also feel a little nervous to start working next month as that will just upset all this relaxing and simplicity I have going on. However, change is good and I'm sure we will thrive on the new working schedule. The kids already understand that I'm done with school and that I will start working soon. They know I'm working to help our family and so that we can do fun things like travel more and save up for things around the house and college. Ok, the college saving doesn't really excite the kids but I try to explain it all to them. I'm a little disappointed because my job starts the same week as vacation bible school. I always volunteer at VBS and won't be able to this year. I know I'm scheduled to work M-W, and not sure about Th and Fri. I hope to be able to be there for the friday sing along to wrap up the VBS week. My kids just love VBS, and I have always loved volunteering. I will really miss it. Hopefully next year I can take that week off (or if I'm still on evenings I will have mornings off anyway).

I'm home alone this week for a few days. I am up late as I usually am when I'm alone. I am always tired the next day but I have trouble sleeping at night when hubby is gone.

We found out last week that B needs glasses again. The ones he picked out are so cute. Jenna told him "Bret, you look really handsome with glasses" (when he was trying them on). He picked out some copper/red glasses that are a little "bold" but he is excited. I really really hope that all the kids think they are as cool as him. Is 3rd grade too young to think glasses aren't cool?

J had T-ball today, and she thinks she is really cool stuff. She has been waiting and waiting. I hope it is all she hoped it would be. It probably isn't as exciting as she was thinking but hopefully she will have fun. She really want to have real games like B, but this is more informal. I do think that they have a little game at the end and we will make a big deal about that for her. She really needs more of her own things. She just has not wanted to play sports like her brother until now. We tried dance and that totally flopped. She likes gymnastics and claims she is going to play basketball next year.

I'm off to bed!

RN

I passed! I passed!! I PASSED!!!!!!!!
Now I can really start my summer vacation. Talk about relief!

NCLEX on the brain

I am a studying maniac this week. I scheduled my NCLEX (date and time is a secret but I'll post once I pass!) and I am studying daily. I hate it. I have done over 1000 questions and am doing at least 200 every day. I have a schedule of what to do each day and I try to stay ahead. I do at least 2 hr a day off and on. It is so hard to do because hey, I am done with school. I am supposed to be relaxing and drinking margaritas and going for long walks and cleaning my house. Instead, every free minute is studying STILL!!! The kids have school today so I did do a little cleaning and the past 2 hours I have studied. I plan to go on a 3 mile jog/walk and then come home and shower. I may study some more tonight but this afternoon I'm taking off. B has a baseball game tonight and DH is heading out of town soon for a night. I am a single mom tonight. We will go to baseball and then maybe pick up fast food or something. I am up to jogging about 1.5 miles until I walk. Then I jog/walk the final 1.5 miles. So, I bet I jog almost 2 of those 3 miles. I don't ever remembering getting quite this far. I know, for many 2 miles is nothing but for a NON runner like myself it isn't too shabby. I did my 3 miles a little over 30 minutes yesterday.
I'm off to get some stuff done, and wish me luck!

The Power of Ten

The Power of Ten
Ten Years Ago I was 24 years old and planning my wedding. I was recently engaged and planned a wedding in less than 6 months. I was so very young and optimistic. I was working in Iowa and interviewing for jobs back here at home. I started a new job in Aug of 1998 and we moved here.

Ten Months Ago It was mid summer and I was working as a nursing student intern. I was working 32 hr a week for the first time after being a stay at home mom for many years.

Ten Weeks Ago I was still in the midst of my last semester of school. I was going out to dinner with friends at a really expensive restaurant (so not worth it) and trying to just fit it all in.

Ten Days Ago I was walking 5 miles and both kids were in school. I was packing for a trip to Iowa.

Ten Hours Ago I was playing with my kids in the basement. We were trying to figure out my new WII Fit.

Ten Minutes Ago I was tickling J on the living room floor telling her how much I love her

Ten Minutes From Now I will be helping J get ready for bed. We are home alone, B and DH are at a wrestling party and we left early.

Ten Hours From Now I will hopefully be sleeping soundly in my cozy bed!

Ten Days From Now it will be a Wed and I will be studying for my boards, playing with J while B is in school, and going to B's baseball game in the evening.

Ten Weeks From Now I will be completing my first week of work. I will be very overwhelmed and exhausted but hopefully in a good way!

Ten Months From Now I will be feeling more comfortable in my job and hoepfully looking into some grad schools to start part time in the fall. I will hopefully love my job.

Ten Years From Now i will have a 18 and an almost 16 year old!!! I will have been a nurse for 10 years and will have found my dream job and area of nursing that I am meant for. I will have my masters in some area of nursing and have a great job that I love with flexibility to do things I love outside of work as well. I will spend lots of time with my hubby and hopefully travel often.

Part of me kind of hopes that I might even have a 3rd child by this time but time will tell on that one. If we do have a 3rd it will not be for another year (not trying until I have been working a year) so that I get established in my work and decide if it is in the cards. I would not go back to being a stay at home mom so it would have to feel right and work out that I can work and not use a lot of child care. It depends on many things: my job, DH job, finances, how we all handle me working etc. I am almost to the point of saying 100% I am done having kids. I love my 2 with all my heart and would be 100% content forever. I do not think I would ever regret not having a 3rd but part of me would love a 3rd. I think either way I'm ok. DH is very fine with the 2 we have and at this point is not ready for a 3rd. It would take a lot of discussion for him to agree to it. If I do have a 3rd, in 10 years he/she would probably be 7-8 yr old. Part of me can't fathom starting the whole baby thing over. Choices!!!!!!

secret date

I have scheduled my NCLEX test and am keeping the date a secret. I got my authorization to test (ATT) number yesterday so I scheduled online today. Let's say I don't have a ton of time to prepare. I really want to get it over with and have it behind me so I can enjoy the part of my summer that I am not working or studying!

I am off to bed but a couple things from this week to jot down:

• J's field trip today to the farm. Beautiful 70 degree weather and lots of fun things to see.
• B's baseball game this Wed, he got 2 singles and did great. Says he likes baseball now!
• We had a garage sale this week. I got rid of lots of stuff!!! YAY!
• My WII Fit arrived and just tried it out today. My BMI is supposedly 21, and I am having fun getting to know my new little gadget. Hoping it will help me gain some strength and better posture/balance. The kids also had fun doing the balance games.
• Looked at bearded dragons today. Thinking of getting one for a pet, the kids are really hoping for this!
• Spring finally here. Sun has been out, and no longer wearing heavy jackets. Spring jackets still needed in the mornings and some days but much improvement in the weather.
• Opened up the camper last weekend. Looking forward to spending lots of time there.
• Our weekend is actually pretty open. Hoping to relax, study, read, and spend time together as a family without running all over.

Evening/Weekend Graduating Nursing Class of 2008

I am now a "graduate nurse"!! I am in the 2nd row, 5th person over from the left (2nd over from the right). Pinning was great. I am glad I did it. I will miss some of the friends I have made but I know we will stay in touch. I was really happy my favorite instructor was there (she is on sabatical this year and not teaching) and she was able to pin me. It meant a lot to me to have someone who really taught me a lot and encouraged me to pin me. I will try to post a picture of my pin (I have 2 actually) later. One is the school nursing pin and one is designed by a classmate.

On a side note (because grades are not the most important thing!) I did end up getting an A by just a few points so I graduate from nursing school with a 4.0. I am proud of that, even though it doesn't really affect getting a job. It may help later if I want to get into a masters program. But, really it was just a goal I had for myself and I almost didn't make it. My grade was actually listed as a B and I emailed the instructor to check the calculations and there was an error. I had to get 92% to get an A and I got 92.95%!! Talk about cutting it close.

DONE! And misc.

Yippee!!!!!

I am now a graduate nurse.

After 4 years of going to school every week I am done.

Pinning tomorrow night. I am going to relax the rest of the week. Then I will start NCLEX studying. I plan to do at least 100 questions a day until the test. That won't be too hard as I can do them here and there and after the kids are in bed do at least half of them each day. I can also do them while they are at school.

It still is not spring here. I wish for sun tomorrow.

I walked/jogged about 4-5 miles today. I have to see how far it was tomorrow in the car. It felt great. I actually jog now. I usually jog the first 1.5 miles then walk and then try to do some jogginb spurts the rest of the way. I still can't imagine going for 4 mile runs but maybe someday. I have been drinking lots of fluids (water and hot green and black tea) and feel like my body is getting cleansed. I feel great!

I also have tried to sign up for Blog Bots to get updates. I have not gotten any email updates yet, and have no idea why as the blogs I put in there have updated. When I changed my blog appearance I lost my blog list so I searched for them all and pasted the links in blogbots and still nothing. Not sure what I did wrong. Anyone know?

4 Hour Countdown

At 6pm I will be starting my final nursing school test ever!! I am nervous, excited, scared, happy, and grateful all at once. It doesn't feel like it is really over, I really don't know when it will hit me. I just am going to feel so weird when I am done. In some ways I will feel empty, but I have to learn to feel full with the things in my life that I do have, my kids and my husband, my friends, my home. I have to re-arrange my life and I'm so excited to spend more time with all of my loved ones.

I also am going to spend more time with myself, taking care of myself. Exercising and pampering myself every so often. Enjoying the small things in life. I am so excited about that. I will do all the things I love to do that I had to put off. Scrapbooking, crafting, changing things in my home, re-arranging furniture and rooms, painting walls, cleaning, cooking, and anything else I can think of!!

Wish me luck tonight!

Surreal

It really is crazy to me that in 4 days I will be done with nursing school. How is that possible. I have been working and working for this for almost 4 years. I have been in school for that long, studying, balancing, stressing, and hoping for it all to be over. Now it is. I can't believe it. I am not sure what I will feel like when it is done. It has been such a huge part of my life. I will no longer have to stay up late and study. I will no longer have to do care plans or write papers or do group projects or take notes and read them over and over. I will no longer have to drive to class every Mon and Wed night. I will not see the people that I have seen 2 or more times a week every week for 2 years anymore. Some parts will be sad. I met a wonderful friend in my very first class that I took towards being a nurse. It was sociology. We then had every single class together from then on. I have known her almost 4 years and I have talked with her every week for almost all of those. I have seen her at least 2 times a week. I now will not see her anymore (well hopefully some but not 2 times a week!) and that is sad. I also met so many other amazing people in nursing school. All types, all ages, everyone is so different yet we all were headed down the same path. We all wanted that RN behind our name. Some of us made it, and we lost some along the way. Some really great people did not make it through nursing school, and they had to put their dream on hold and try again next year. We may even lose more people come monday (our last test). I really hope everyone that has made it this far makes it all the way. They deserve it.

FIESTAWARE

For some reason, lately I have been obsessed with Fiestaware dishes. I do not own any of these dishes but have always loved the idea of having various colors to mix and match and can picture them in my one set of glass doored cupboards. I can't bring myself to buy any, just because I don't need them. I packed up our old dishes that we never used and put them in the garage for the sale I am having next month. They were cheap, white, and boring. Plus, very heavy. We tend to use our plastic plates a lot, and that is so not right. I have my good china but don't want to use that as our everyday dinnerware. I also have an 8 place setting of 2 other sets of dishes but I really do not like either. One is a hand me down from my parents. They had it as newlyweds and I don't have the heart to get rid of it. It is dark brown and green. The other set is dollar store dishes, and they are actually kind fo nice. They are sturdy and kind of remind me of fiestaware. However, the only colors they had were an olive green and pumpkin orange. I was hoping for a mix of colors and my friend who told me about them had a nice burnt red color she had found but they were out. So, I have about 4 of each green and orange in plates, bowls, and mugs. They are "ok" but not my fiestaware. I am 34 yr old and have been married almost 10 years and I really want those dishes!!! I have gone to Kohl's a few times lately to look at the place settings. They are about $20 each and I'd want at least 4 settings to start out with so that is about $80. My plan is to have my garage sale in May and see how much I make and then use that money and wait for a good coupon to come (one time I got 30%!) and possibly make my purchase. I seem to be buying a lot of stuff lately, or wanting to change things. I don't know if it is because I am starting a new chapter in my life or that I know I'll be making money soon, or just that I'm getting bored with things that I have had for years. I just don't know. I really am not a big shopper or spender (even though it sounds like it a lot on this blog lately!) I never, ever go to malls. I pretty much buy everything we have either on sale or clearance. I do not buy name brand things for any of us. I buy almost everything at Target or Kohls. Does anyone out there have fiestaware? Tell me about it!! I've been searching online and the cheapest I've seen is $20 for a place setting of 4 or 5. I'd prefer the 4 piece but Kohls only has the 5. I don't think I need saucers. I also want a variety of colors and then add more as I can. I would even buy secondhand but ebay seems even more expensive. Until I actually buy it, I will just picture it in my cupboard and dream! HA!

Changes ahead

I can't believe the end of April is just around the corner. I have my final exam May 12 and pinning May 14. Then I'm done with school. I will be trying to get an early June NCLEX date so I will spend the rest of May studying. I will then hopefully take the NCLEX first week of June and have a month off from everything until I start my job July 28. I am eager to transition from student to RN. I am so looking forward to a break from school. I do plan to go back for my masters in time, but not sure when I will do that. I may take classes here and there to take advantage of my tuition reimbursement and get some generals done for the masters program. I do want to work at least a year before doing any school. I need a break!! And working will be plenty to keep me busy!

I am starting my outside walking again, now that it is above freezing. It still is not "spring" around here. We still need to dress warm, but hopefully in the next couple weeks things will warm up. I am walking in the MS Walk again May 4, and we never know what the weather will be. It has varied from sunny and warm to snow and sleet. It is 8 miles so I need to do some regular walking until then to prepare my body so it isn't in pain that day!! I did 3 miles yesterday and typically do about 3 miles at least a few times a week.

The kids are done with school the first week in June. Then we will be busy doing fun summer stuff. Can't wait!

Snow Day

The kids happened to have the day off school, due to parent/teacher conferences so we are all home. There is quite a bit of snow outside and there is more coming. I sure hope spring/summer comes quickly!! I just cleaned the hardwood floors, by hand this time (usually I use the swiffer mop). I have to put everything back then I'm not going to do too much housework. I already did all my laundry yesterday. The kids are playing nicely as of now. I think I'll help them make a fort in the basement. They would love that. Not much else going on today. Nice to have a day with no plans. Tomorrow B has 2 birthday parties back to back. I plan to take the kids to the yearly library used book sale. Most books are $1 or less. Usually they find some treasures and I love good deals on books. DH and I plan to have a night out tomorrow night for my birthday. My parents volunteered to babysit so we will think of something fun to do. There are a lot of movies out I'd like to see. Anyway, that is what is going on around here!!

I didn't think 5 1/2 year olds could still have tantrums?

But guess what? They can!! J had a great big one today at Tar-jay. Not fun, and totally unexpected really. She used to have them often as a 2-3 yr old when she did not get what she wanted but she seems a bit old. Here is the story....

We had to get a few groceries and 2 birthday gifts for parties this weekend. While in the toys, of course the kids like to wander around and look at toys. J found this little baby Bratz thing in a bottle. It was like $4.99. I told her she could hold onto it and I'd see, as I really wasn't planning on buying them any toys and she is out of money. B also found these little Playmobile pirates. They are like $2.99. Not a big deal. But still, as we walked around I started thinking of all the toys they have at home that aren't played with. I started feeling guilty, like I should not give in to them just because they are inexpensive. I also was thinking of the week previous. J was home sick, really sick, with a bad double ear infection. She was so pathetic and sick, while at the pharmacy I totally caved and bought her this trick/magic set for like $6, it was such a waste of money if you saw what was in it. She played with it for one day. I also thought of the past few weeks. My husband bought them a little something a couple weeks back. They also got some stuff from their grandparents. They have all these toys they don't even truly know all they have. Pathetic really.

So, towards the end of the shopping I said "I am not punishing you, you both were very good. I just do not think you need these toys so we are not going to buy them today." B has his own money and I still did not let him just because he has some similar toys at home already that he does not play with. B was sad but ok. J started having this major meltdown for like the whole time we were checking out. She first would not give me the toy, then I started the 1-2-3 and by 3 she handed it over but still was freaking out. It was totally out of control. It is like she lost control of her emotions. This shows me that she is not told "no" enough, and she needs to learn disappointment a little better. I feel like I have messed up with her. She is our baby and we seem to cater to her in some ways. Even her brother hates to see her upset. He said "mom, get her the toy. you don't have to buy mine." Is that the saddest thing?? He hates her upset. Being upset is part of life and this was a lesson for the kids and for me. Say no!!

I have to say, we usually do not venture to the toy area for this reason. They always find something they just LOVE and it is the most amazing wonderful toy ever made. I typically shop alone or stay in just the grocery area. When we have to buy gifts is when we go to the toy area. I should not have to avoid the toy area, and next time I will make it very clear they won't be getting anything. I know it was probably confusing for them, as I told them they could hold onto the toys but I changed my mind about buying them. Is that wrong??? What do you think?

On another note, it is snowing. Like really snowing. Big, wet snowflakes. And it is APRIL!

34

Today I am 34 years old. I don't know where the years have gone!! I still feel like I am 18 years old sometimes!! I am happy and content to be in my 30's and have so much to look forward to. I have the life I always dreamed of, or even more. I have a loving family, 2 beautiful and healthy kids, wonderful friends, a roof over my head, and my health. I have food to eat, clothes to wear and money to spend. I am a lucky woman.

I am spending my birthday kid-less (both at schools) and studying for a big exam tomorrow. Not the most exciting day but that is ok. I don't want or need much. I just am happy to be here! I came home from class last night to find a trail of computer printed letters down the hall and up the stairs saying: "HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOM. WE LOVE YOU!" What a nice surprise. That is all I need.

I have to admit I did do some shopping for myself this year. More than usual. The coats (see post below, they still have not arrived...), and I ordered myself this makeup kit:
http://www.everydayminerals.com/g?cartItem=1&productId=624&t=incompleteKit&cartId=
If you like mineral makeup, this company is great. They have really affordable makeup and great quality. I have tried drugstore brands and I either break out or don't like the color or how it wears throughout the day. Since starting to wear mineral makeup, my skin has cleared up a lot and I break out a lot less and when I do it is not as bad as it used to be when I used regular liquid foundation. I got my makeup yesterday and have been trying my new colors out. The stuff I got should last me a long time. The sizes are really generous and you get so much for your money.

My other gifts also include new blinds (ordered online also from http://www.selectblinds.com/, which DH is going to install for me. I am excited for the new look. And we put this on reserve at the local video game store: http://e3nin.nintendo.com/wii_fit.html. It is the new WII Fit game, coming out in May. I have read and heard really good things about it, and hope it is something I can incorporate into my workout. Plus, the whole family can have fun with it. So, I am spoiled this year.

J came in this AM and gave me a piece of her gum and a bottle of her nail polish. Orange nail polish! She is so sweet.

I better get back to studying. Here's to another great year.

JOB

Today I finally got a call for the job offer I've been waiting for since monday. I know, it was only 3 days but to wait for that call is hard!! I was fairly sure I would get the job but not positive. I did my preceptorship in this unit, but not a lot of experience in this area. Luckily they are in need of RN's and I was lucky enough to get an interview. It is in an emergency department, at a fairly busy hospital. It is in my hometown about 25 min away. It is a great unit, the people are really supportive and helpful. I am nervous as heck to start but that is not until July. I have 2 options for shifts:

1. Evenings 56 hr/pay period (2 weeks) so approx. 28 hr/week. 3pm-1130pm. Every other weekend.

2. Day/night 72 hr/pay period so about 36 hr/week (more than I wanted). 7am-7pm or 7pm-7am. Every 3rd weekend. 12 hr shifts are SO long!

My ideal job would be 8 hr shifts day/evening rotation every 3rd weekend. I would like to work about 28-32 hr a week. But as a new grad I can't be picky and was given these options. Things change quickly and new shifts will open up after I've been there a while and being internal I can get first dibs on those new openings.

I did not initially want an evening shift, due to missing kid stuff. However, I'm leaning that way just because the hours are less and I think I would handle it better physically and emotionally. I am not sure I'm ready to work 36 hr/week, 12 hr shifts, plus nights for some of them. That is a lot to take on. I can always pick up shifts if I want more money. The downside is that during the week I will not see the kids those days. However, it is only a couple days a week and I do that now with school in the evenings. I don't think I'd seem them much more working the 12 hr shifts due to it taking up the entire day. Hard call. The one thing I hate to pass up is the every 3rd weekend. That would be nice to have more weekends off. But that weekend I work would be basically total work. If I do evenings I have mornings at home on those weekend days.

Anyway, I feel lucky to have an offer. Many people are having trouble getting interviews. You know that nursing shortage, not really around here. I'm sure it will eventually be that way but it isn't right now. There are many new grads and hospitals can be picky. There are jobs but many just want you to have some experience. So, I really can't be picky about it. I have to get my foot in the door somewhere. I loved working emergency dept and I will see and do so much.

I'm still up and it is nearly midnight. I am so tired. J had a tough day. She had a fever of 101 and had to take antibiotics orally and drops in her ears. She also is taking tylenol when I can get her to. She did not eat much and was very tired and cranky all day. I eventually picked her up late afternoon and sat in the rocker recliner with her, holding her like I did when she was a baby. Within 5 minutes she was out, and slept nearly 3 hours. I held her almost half of that time and loved it. She is so long and big now but still just my baby.

I'm off to bed. I did some homework and prepared for our simulation weekend this saturday at school. I also have computer training for the new charting system at the hospital so I can make up my OB day that I missed due to being sick earlier this month. I have lots to do for school still, but am trying to take it one day at a time.

So frustrated

4:30 - leave house to bring kids to grandma's so I can go to class
5:30-8:00 - at class
8:15 - get a call from grandma telling me J says her ear hurts
8:30 - pick up kids and try to get out of there quick to make it to urgent care
9:10 - get to urgent care near home to find out they close at 9:00
9:15 - try another urgent care in town - closed, decide to drive to neighboring town 20 minutes away, not even sure if urgent care will be open but J crying uncontrollably, have to do something
9:40 - reach urgent care, it is open until 10!
10:00 - leave urgent care with 2 prescriptions. Double ear infection
10:05 - reach pharmacy, closed at 10:00 pm
10:20 - back in home town, hoping one of the 3 pharmacies are open
10:45 - have tried all 3, none are open. Tylenol from urgent care working a bit, J feeling better, falls asleep
10:50 - decide to go home and get through the night on tylenol/ibuprofen and get prescription in AM. All that work to find an urgent care and no medicine to take home. Could have waited until AM and see dr in town by appt. Very frustrated
11:00 - get kids in bed. Very tired kids and mom. No husband in town to help out
11:30 - about to go to bed. J wakes up crying in pain
11:45 - looking online for 24 hr pharmacy. About to get both kids in truck to get the meds
11:50 - J falls asleep again. I crawl in bed with her.
12:00 am - J wakes again moaning. I ask her if she wants to get the medicine but she does not want to get up. Give another dose motrin and hope for the best
12:15 - J asleep again. I'm wide awake yet exhausted.
12:30 - I decide to sleep in J's bed (it's a double thankfully). I eventually fall asleep.
Wake a few times at night. No terrible crying, but some uncomfortable moaning. Poor baby.
7 am - J is up and her ears hurt. I give another dose Motrin
7:30 am - both kids up watching cartoons. I'm exhausted and can't seem to get up.
8:00 am - I finally drag myself out of bed and shower. Call school absence line for J, make breakfast for B, make B's lunch
8:30 - J throws up the motrin all over her pants (luckily in the kitchen, not on carpet!)
8:45 - leave to drop B off at school.
9:00 - get to pharmacy down the street. Get prescriptions filled. J says she is feeling better (motrin that stayed in???)
9:15 - go to McD to get some DVD's for the day at home
9:30 - arrive home, have J eat a little something before giving antibiotics and ear drops
9:45 - put in DVD and make J a bed on living room floor.
10:00 - get out my homework that I am going to attempt to do during the day off and on, probably not with much luck.
11:00 - J watching movie, looking tired
I'm hoping for a nap today and really hoping we all sleep more tonight!!! The joys of motherhood! And why do these things happen at the worst time when DH is out of town?? I was just so frustrated! At least it is just an ear infection. Could be worse!

Praying

Praying this is it!! This is the 2nd call that this family has gotten in the past week for a lung transplant. The first call ended up being a dry run (the lungs were not good) and they had their hopes up with no results. I am praying so hard that this time is the real deal.

http://cfhusband.blogspot.com/

This story is a true testament to organ donation. It is such a gift to give someone. I have been an organ donor since getting my first license and have made my wishes known to my husband and family. I would love for many others to have the gift of life once I am gone. I truly think it is such a wonderful gift and way to keep a spirit alive. If you aren't an organ donor, please read this story (even if you are, read it!) and consider it!

Pray for Tricia!!!

ordering for next year

I decided today to search online for a winter coat for myself for next year. Since we have winter here from about October until April, I really wear my winter coats a LOT! I have had the same boring black one for about 7 years or more. I can remember buying it when I used to work downtown. It is really plain and boring, and just old. I also have a white coat (what was I thinking) that I wear often but it is white and I do wear makeup which seems to get on the collar. It isn't my favorite thing to wear and if I remember right I spent about $10 on it!! So, I searched and found the website overstock.com and ended up ordering 2 coats for what I feel is a pretty good deal. Hopefully I will be able to use them a lot in the winters to come!

I got this one in red:
http://www.overstock.com/Clothing/Jou-Jou-Detachable-Faux-Fur-Trim-Hooded-Jacket/2929412/product.html

I also found this one and really liked it so I splurged:
http://www.overstock.com/Clothing/Marcelle-Renee-Belted-Womens-Wool-Coat/2929420/product.html

I really probably do not need 2 coats but I promise I won't buy any for many years!!! Let's hope they are warm. MN winters call for warm coats.

I really want to find a coat for B for next year, along with winter boots. I missed all the clearance sales at the stores. He really needs some good winter boots that are able to dry out by the next day. I'd prefer ones with a liner that is removable and can be dried. I searched a bit online with no success. He will need a new coat next year also. I found one for J but missed the boys coats I guess. And the snowpants always go quickly and I missed out on those for both kids. Bummer. I may find something at some garage sales this summer. I will keep my eyes open. Last year I found some snowpants for J which she used all winter. Luckily, they can usually wear the same coats for about 2 years before needing a new one. I am trying to talk J into wearing some hand me down coats from B, even though they are quite "boyish". They are nice and warm though!!

One thing I used a ton this year are some boots I got for myself at Targ*t. They are suede and fur lined and only $20. They were put to good use on those cold snowy days. In fact, I wore them today!! Ugg's are a big thing here but not in my price range!!

So, as spring approaches I prepare for the cold of next winter. Let's hope for a nice warm summer in the meantime, even if we only get a couple months of warmth!

Alone

After unexpectedly getting called out of town for work, my husband is gone. I am alone for the first time in many months. I have been spoiled lately, with him working from home. It used to be common for him to be gone for 5 days at a time a couple of times a month. I was used to being alone at night, doing all the childcare and housework. But lately I have been used to having him here. Knowing he will be with me at night, and I will sleep soundly with him by my side. I feel like it is so very quiet and lonely tonight. I don't want to go to bed because it will be cold and quiet. Too quiet. I dread the nights the most.

I can hear J snoring. Poor girl has a really stuffy nose. Her breathing is loud and labored. I will go adjust her pillow to try to get her nose to clear a bit. I know how she feels, as I am getting over a bad cold myself. B is wrapped up in his big blanket. I call him red riding hood, he loves to wrap his whole head in his comforter and sleep with just a little breathing hole. I always go in before I go to bed and unwrap his head, to find him all wet with sweat. His long hair sticking to his head all warm and flushed with heat. My boy is such a sweet thing. And J is usually drooling on her pillow. She is not a sound sleeper like her brother. When I check on her, she will sometimes talk to me. I whisper I love you to each kid and B never responds except for a change of position and mumble. J will occasionally whisper back to me that she loves me too. She sometimes has whole conversations with me with her eyes closed.

Back to school - good bye spring (snow) break

It is April tomorrow and we are getting a snow storm. Nice. The roads are slushy and slippery. The snow fell ALL day, it was that wet heavy snow. I am so sick of winter.

I am off to bed but wanted to share something:

I was dropping B off this morning at school. He woke up unhappy about his return to the classroom and all that "work" he has to do all day. I got out to let him out, and give him a quick hug (he still lets me hug him, at age 8, so I'm taking advantage).

Me: have a great day, see you later!
B: giving me a weird look and smile, being kind of bashful
Me: what??? What's wrong?
B: I am just going to miss you (quietly)
Me: I'm going to miss you to, but I'll see you later. Have a good day and I love you!
He then walked up to school, waving at me the entire walk up the sidewalk. So cute, he actually does miss me sometimes!!!

spring break come and gone

The kids head back to school this week. They are ready! J does not have school until Tuesday (every other day) but they are getting kind of bored around here. The weather warmed up just slightly today so they were outside although it is muddy and still snow/ice on the ground. J attempted the 2 wheeler and can go quite a few feet before tipping over. She will get it soon though. B played with some friends in the neighborhood and we all worked on cleaning sticks and leaves from the grass that was actually showing. I vacuumed out the car and truck and washed both car seats. I even took off the fabric covers and machine washed them. They are air drying now. Spring cleaning I guess! I also ordered new blinds today for the whole first floor and basement. So excited for those to come. They are faux wood, but will look so much better than the cheapo ones I have now (that came with the house that is almost 10 yr old!). I checked and re-checked my measurements pray they will fit just right. Should be here in a week or 2. I have been cleaning out all the rooms, and our closet is back in order. I have been bagging up stuff for a garage sale and it is so nice to get rid of stuff we don't use. I bagged up a ton of kids books after hanging onto them too long. The baby books and board books. My kids are not into those and I was holding onto them more for the memories than for them to actually use. I did, of course, keep the ones I truly love. And we will have quite a collection of books to use for the future grandchildren!

I have an exciting event tomorrow that I am not going to talk about just yet, but it could be a big thing for me and our family. I am so hoping it all goes well. I will write more about it when I know more. It isn't a pregnancy or anything, but something that affects our future.

Not much else is too exciting. I have school 2 nights this week as well as Saturday. Then I am getting so close to being done. I have a big test coming up and another big teaching project. I also have the HESI exit exam to see if I'm ready for the NCLEX. We are planning our pinning ceremony and I ordered my nursing pin. It is all so real, I will actually finish this program!

Kid are doing well, I will write a post about them later this week!

bad mommy morning

I just had one of those mornings when I was just feeling crabby and could not get everything ready, we were running late, it is picture day so I had to bathe them before school, forgot to pack snacks and had to go back in, just everything was going wrong. And then I get crabby with the kids and now I feel guilty. Oh well, I am human right? I still feel bad. I want them to have a cheerful and happy mom but I just can't do that 24/7. J woke up at 4am with a bad dream and came into our bed. I was kicked all night and slept terrible from that point on. She has been having bad dreams which is new to me as B never does (or doesn't wake up from them). She gets to sad that it is hard to tell her to go back to bed.

I am on spring break for a week. I have lots to do but no class. I have less than 2 months left. This weekend we are getting a sitter and going out with friends, adults only!! And Sun is my purse party open house. Hopefully I'll get lots of people over so it is worth the work for me and the person selling the purses (my friend's mother in law). I have to serve snacks and drinks and clean up the first floor at least. I am not too worried.

I am off to exercise, shower, and maybe use a gift card and go shopping. Try to have a fun day despite the bad start!

For Tricia

http://cfhusband.blogspot.com/
I've been following the above blog for a month or 2 now. What an amazing story, amazing family, it just humbles me. Take a look if you have the time, or even if you don't.

This is a list "for Tricia" - all the things she will one day experience with her baby girl born at 24 weeks. As a mom of 2, I have lots to add! :)

• Watching as your baby girl begins to crawl, then walk, to explore the world
• Teething, lots of drool, crabby baby, sleepless nights, Tylenol
• Ear infections, when she wakes up screaming at night and won't stop
• First foods, huge messes on the high chair. I can especially remember pink yogurt and chocolate pudding being particularly messy.
• Naked baby running through the sprinkler
• First time with a babysitter, being so nervous and finding out she didn't even miss you very much
• First words, learning to count, the first "I love you"
• Arms up high wanting only momma to pick her up
• Rocking a sick baby to sleep and not wanting to put her down
• First day of school, heart aching but smiling at the same time
• When she only wants to wear the same shirt, day after day, it is her favorite after all
• Toddler independence, only wanting to do things "by herself" no matter how difficult
• Pierced ears, nail polish, glitter, stickers, bows, make up, lip gloss, all things girl
• And many, many, many other amazing things to look forward to.

Why did I have to open my big mouth?

If you look at my last post you will know what I am talking about. I had to just go on about the 4 lb right?? Well, after that the stomach virus went through our house and I got hit. I ended up losing those 4 lb, and not in a way that I wish to re-live! I would rather have the 4 lb than to be sick any day. Oh well, I am recovered and lived to tell about it. I am so extremely tired right now but wanted to quick post. We spent the weekend at the state wrestling tournament, and B took 7th (out of 40 in his weight class) so I think he did great, he is upset that he did not get a medal (only 1st - 6th get medals) and my husband is sad also because B has had a great year and did so much better than last year and we both were hoping so much for him that he could place and get on the podium and get a medal. We know how disappointed he is. As much as I know that he did great, that he is so improved and works so hard, he just doesn't correlate that to anything. He only sees the black and white. But life is full of disappointments and he is a kid and will get over it as soon as he starts thinking of something else. We stayed in a hotel and the kids had a blast with their friends. I did not sleep at all. The night before we left DH had the sickness and was up all night so I went to sleep on the couch thinking I'd sleep better but I still heard him every time and was up pretty much all night. The couch is NOT comfortable I have to say. So, I then did not sleep well either night in the hotel. I was afraid the kids would fall off the bed or wake up sick or ???? I just was too anxious also about the tournament. I never sleep well in hotels. So, we just returned tonight and instead of going to bed nice and early with everyone else I had to finish up a group presentation that I agreed to do this weekend (my part of it was to put it all together in a powerpoint). So, I just got that done and have to get to sleep before I fall over. The kids both have school and I am not going to be a happy camper come tomorrow morning. We also had the time change so that messes me up also. I sound like a big complainer, guess I'm just tired. I did have a fun weekend and things are really going fine. I have my big presentation Wed then we have spring break next week. I am half way done with my FINAL semester. I don't know what I will do when I'm done with this!!! It will be so weird to not have the work to do all the time. I'll have regular work but not school work.

Not much else to write about. I'm off to bed!

4 pounds

After holding my weight at a GREAT place for almost 6 months, I am up about 4 lb. I actually have been up about 3-4 lb since the holidays. So, it isn't like I'm slowly continuing upward but it could happen if I don't do something. I really want to get back to that nice weight I was at a few months ago. I know the gain is due to many things: holiday eating, travel to MI for almost a week of eating out, lack of time to plan/cook so eating too many unhealthy options, and finally skipping meals when I go to school or work and then getting way overhungry and then eating junk. Example, last night I had school so I had a late lunch and no dinner. By the time I got home at 8:30 I was way hungry. I started out with a nice healthy low fat tortilla with cheese and hot peppers. Small, lots of fiber, and would have been good to stop there. But I was still hungry so I decided to have a few tortilla chips. I should know better. I love chips. Had WAY too many. Then I wanted a small piece of chocolate. Which turned into 3 pieces. And ended up with me way too full and going to bed feeling yucky. When I was losing weight, I never ever ate after 6pm. I really need to start that again. I feel so much better going to bed a little hungry and having a big (healthy) breakfast of eggs or oatmeal or cereal/english muffin. I do still exercise but probably not as much as I did. Soon it will be warm enough to walk outside and I will get more activity in. I just have to catch this before I am up 10 lb and REALLY mad at myself.

Oh my gosh

I am starting to feel my heart beat a little faster due to an overwhelming feeling of doom that I have so much to do the next few weeks. The homework is piling on, as it always does about a month into the semester. I always get through it, but still it just is this long list of things to do that seems so long and never just goes away. I have clinical this weekend. My 2nd to last one, yippee!! However, I have an instructor that I have not had before and though I have heard she is really good I have also heard that you MUST. KNOW. YOUR. MEDS or she may send you home. This means 2 patients who could be on like 10 meds or more each. So, I'm a little nervous about that as pharmacology isn't my strong suit, and I basically hate memorizing medication info that I will forget in a day or 2. It's one of those things that you need to memorize it but you won't really learn it unless it is a med you give routinely. So, I have that to look forward to in the wee morning hours of Friday/Saturday. I have to be at the hospital by 6:30 AM Sat AND Sun. Not looking forward to that AT ALL. But I know that each day I go in, I am that much closer to being done. After this weekend I will only have my OB rotation left and I heard that one isn't too bad at all. I also have this ridiculous group project looming over me, along with a 10 page paper, test coming up the first week in march (did I mention I got a B on the first test, yes a B, and I'm not happy about it). So, I really need to study a lot for that.

Tomorrow both kids have school and I COULD get a lot done for school. However, my mommy guilt for having to be gone all weekend will probably have me at their school most of the day. I volunteer in B's room Thur mornings 9:30-10:30 and J's room 10:30-??? whenever I can get out of there. I am debating going to lunch also but that means B at 11:40 and J at 12:40, which is a lot of waiting around to sit in a lunchroom with my kids who are usually to busy socializing with the other kids than to talk to me. But they claim to really want me to eat lunch with them so my presence must be all they need to feel loved!

Today J and I cleaned out some rooms and got rid of a few bags of clothes, toys, and kids stuff that they have outgrown. I am trying to whittle down and get rid of things they no longer play with. I was surprised how many puzzles we had that just are way too easy for a 5 1/2 and 8 year old. I would like to get rid of many books but that is hard for me to do. We love our books. I now have to decide if a garage sale is worth it or if I just donate it and take the easy way out. Whenever I've had a garage sale I never make any money, no one comes, and it rains. All that work for a measly $50 isn't really worth it.

The weather is absolutely frigid. It was -11 today. The kids don't get to even play outside at recess it is that cold. It is getting a little old. We have had a really cold winter it seems, maybe I've forgotten past years but it seems to be worse this year. I really wonder why I live here sometimes!! I am totally not a cold weather kind of person!!

I am going up to kiss my kiddos and snuggle with my hubby before my crazy weekend begins in 2 days. Wish me luck.

Hello!

I just hate going to blogs and seeing the same post over and over at the top. I am one of those blogs!! Oh well, that is ok. I do my best. Things are going well. I did a rotation in pediatrics this past weekend. It was fun, but probably not what I want to do. It is pretty slow paced and the parents do much of the care for the kids. I had a 7 month old with RSV and a 5 yr old with kidney problems. A couple of students got to work in the peds ICU and that sounded pretty cool. Sad, obviously, but interesting.

Tonight and Wed I have class, then the weekend off. We are actually taking a weekend off from wrestling and going to IA to see family. We still haven't celebrated Xmas with them, so we will do that and visit everyone. Long drive but worth it.

The kids have all their valentines ready for school Thursday. I will get to volunteer at J's party for an hour then I have to go to the hospital for my last preceptorship day in the ER. I will miss working there and maybe I'll get a job there someday! I still do not have my applications out. I am waiting for 1 thing from my last semester clinical instructor. She said she would fill out a reference form and write me a letter of recommendation but she still has not sent them back to me. I hate to bug her via email about it, but I really need to get them sent out. If she is too busy I will just ask another instructor to do it. I basically have everything else ready. I need to start preparing for interviews (assuming I get 1 or 2) and just wait to see if anyone calls.

It is another freezing cold day. I think it is -4 degrees right now. It is crazy. What was really fun was getting up and leaving the house by 5:30am on Sun when it was about -20 degrees. Living in MN sure has it's negatives. When it is this cold you really can't go out at all. We go where we need to go, but nowhere that isn't absolutely necessary. Makes for a long day sometimes. I like to be able to go out and about more, but it just isn't any fun to be out at all. Plus, you have to warm up the car for 30 min for it to be even warm. I also have to pick up kids every day because it is too cold for them to walk home.

Besides being extremely tired (up at 5am Sat and Sun, work all day) things are going well. I spent some time with friends a while back and that was fun. I took J to Hannah Montana movie (why on earth is it $15??? Like she needs the money....) and it was ok. I am getting ready for B's movie birthday party a week from today. We are going to see The Spiderwick Chronicles. It isn't here so I don't have much to do (yay!) His real birthday was busy with school, wrestling practice, and small family celebration here. He seemed happy with everything though. I made his favorite dessert instead of cake (he isn't a big cake fan). It was a big chocolate chip cookie warm from the oven with vanilla ice cream, chocolate sauce, whipped cream and a cherry on top. He gobbled that up and we all go to enjoy some as well. He got 2 more Webkinz (up to 5 now!), a big book about his video game Zelda, a new Wii game, a puzzle, and some other Chapter books. He is into these books called "The Diary of a Wimpy Kid" and they are hilarious. I like to read them! I am trying to get him to read more on his own. He would rather I read to him, even though he is a great reader. It isn't like I don't enjoy reading to him but by this age I was reading big chapter books on my own and I think he should read some books on his own just for enjoyment.

I am off to finish laundry and put away lunch mess. Until next time.....

8 years old

My big boy is going to be 8 tomorrow. At 7:17 am he was born after I was in labor all night long. I went into the hospital around this time 8 years ago. I remember Brian and I had a big steak dinner at my parents house and I was having mild contractions that continued to increase in frequency and intensity throughout the evening. I was really nervous about labor and the pain and the unknown. I had a great birth and no complications. I can still remember it all very clearly. I remember exactly what he looked like when he came out and the midwife put him on my chest. He just stared up at us with big eyes and we fell in love. Happy Birthday to my first baby!!!

It will grow back

It's only hair but for some reason I get attached to hair. My hair and especially the kids hair. Even B who is a boy! He has his hair kind of long-ish. It grew quite long and a few weeks ago DH took him in for a supposed "trim". Well, I was shocked how much he let them cut off and a little upset about it. I loved the long hair. It looked SO cute. Anyway, I got over it and it is only hair. Well, now J has it in her head that she wants a haircut. She has had only trims her entire 5 1/2 years of life. Her hair is about down to her waist. It is a light brown with waves and I love her hair. She gets compliments on it all the time and she has always liked her long hair. Well, last night she told me she wants to cut it to her shoulders!!! That would be about a foot of length cut off. She seems to be confident she wants to do this. However, I'm not confident at all. I feel anxious about HAIR! I think a lot of it comes from my own childhood. My mom always cut my hair and lets say she wasn't exactly a beautician. I always had wavy/curly hair and she would cut bangs and they would always end up super short and crooked looking. And I never had really long hair and always wanted it. Now my daughter has the hair I always wanted as a kid and she doesn't want it, so I know I can't make her keep it for me, but what would you do???? She is saying she wants to do it today after school. I will be so sad to see that hair go if I do it!!! But she should have a choice right??? What if she regrets it??? It is only hair.....

still here

wow, I sure have not written much lately. I am back at school, busy as ever. I am doing my preceptorship in the ER, and LOVE it. So much that I hope to get a job at this hospital. It is about 20-25 min away and is actually the hospital I was born in. I love the staff and love the job. We'll see. I am open to any opportunity that comes my way. I am working on my resume and applications. Hope to get them sent out really soon. School has not been too awful yet. We have a lot to do coming up but it is not terrible. Every weekend we are at wrestling. I'm going to be a little relieved when it is over. It is fun, and we all love it, but it is draining at times. B has had strep and a stomach thing in the past couple weeks so we had to miss some. J finished up her antibiotics for her ear infection, and I'm thinking that may have helped her miss the strep her brother had. The kids' Webkinz are finally working and they love them. They love the computer part of it as well as the actual animals. I think the computer graphics of their animals make them seem more "real" to them. Whoever thought up these things is probably making the big bucks. They cost enough that is for sure. B will probably get one for his birthday next month, but I am not going to be buying them on a regular basis. Both kids used some Xmas money to buy one more so J has a pug dog (Tommy) and a white seal (Snowball). B has a tree frog (goldy) and bull frog (leaper). The kids were looking at a picture of DH and I back in 1998 in Las Vegas and laughing at how dorky we looked. Hard to believe how much has changed since 1998. Anyway, I need to get one more kid to bed and not much exciting is happening around here. I will try to update if and when something exciting does happen!!

Thursday, the last day.....

.....before school starts tomorrow at 8am. I have dreaded this day and hoped for this day to come over the past month. The sooner I start, the sooner I will be done. I have been working for this degree for about 4 years. I think I started taking my classes that I needed to get into nursing school around the time Jenna was 1 or 1 1/2. Then, it seemed like such a huge task, something that was just a little dream that was so far away. Now, I sit 4 months from being DONE with actual nursing school. In 5 months I will have my RN license (assuming I pass the NCLEX). I will be a working nursing in 5-7 months depending on when I start working. Wow. I can't believe I followed the dream all the way to the end. I am almost to the end of one road, and starting on my way down another. But back to reality, I have to finish 4 months of gruling studying, classes, clinical, papers, staying up late etc etc. But I have done it 3 other semesters and I can do it one more.

I am alone in the house, and must leave to get Jenna from her playdate. The kids are keeping me very busy. Wrestling almost takes over our lives this time of year. Bret is doing wonderful and loves his wrestling team. He is 55 pounds this year, he gained about 5 lb since last year. He has only lost 2 matches so far. He is such a hard worker. He works so hard at practice and during his matches. I am so proud of him. He has such determination, more than I have ever had. Jenna is busy with school and her social life. Both kids are just the joy of my life and I love watching them as they grow and change into these little people. So unlike me in many ways but like me in others. Amazing.

ER and end of break coming soon.

You know how I said I got a preceptorship in a cardiac ICU? Well, a couple weeks ago I got an email from the instructor asking if I would like a ER/ED preceptorship instead. That was actually my first choice as I really want to know if I like emergency/trauma nursing. So, I am nervous but exciting to do my 48 hr in an ER. I will see and do a LOT!

I start back up to school Jan 11. I am hoping the semester will go fast. I am starting to print out my application materials. I am sending in my request for transcripts, getting my references lined up, and my resume finished. I am on my way.

Our vacation to Michigan was great. My new nephew is just as cute as can be. We miss him and my brother and sister in law already.

I got the Christmas decorations down this past week. I also did my post Christmas shopping to get stuff fore next year. Wrapping paper, gift tags, ornaments, lights etc. I bought some lights for outside and am going to make my hubby put them up next year. I also bought a 6' artificial tree to put up in the basement. We have a really big basement/playroom that we spend a lot of time in so I may do a traditional/white light more formal tree upstairs and a more homey/kids tree downstairs. I will use the colored lights and all the kid ornaments down there. I look forward to it already!

The kids are doing great. J has a mild ear infection so she is on amoxicilllin for that. She is busy playing with all her fun toys and adjusted to going back to school just fine. B was hoping not to go back to school. He told me "I just want to have peace at my home, and not get bossed around all day at school!" But he admitted that it is ok. He is having a great year in wrestling, but it seems to take up all our weekend time. He enjoys the tournaments, spending time with all the teammates. He is such a dedicated kid for only 7 yr old. I signed J up for gymnastics starting in Feb, and B up for 4 weeks of tennis lessons in April. Something different and hopefully fun. The cheerleading camp J liked before is not $48 for 2 /2 hr saturdays. I am not going to pay that much for 4 hr of cheerleading. The tennis lessons are 4 weeks and only $20.

Anyway, I better get kids fed, bathed, read to, and to bed. They both have school tomorrow.
Goodnight!

I hate Webkinz

I got both J and B Webkinz for Xmas. J is totally able to get on and play and poor B just gets logged out every time. There is no customer support help at all. I feel so bad. I don't know what to do. He wants to play so bad!!! We are able to login but when we try to go into the room, it gives us a message and logs him out. So frustrating. I am just sick of it!!