I didn't think 5 1/2 year olds could still have tantrums?

But guess what? They can!! J had a great big one today at Tar-jay. Not fun, and totally unexpected really. She used to have them often as a 2-3 yr old when she did not get what she wanted but she seems a bit old. Here is the story....

We had to get a few groceries and 2 birthday gifts for parties this weekend. While in the toys, of course the kids like to wander around and look at toys. J found this little baby Bratz thing in a bottle. It was like $4.99. I told her she could hold onto it and I'd see, as I really wasn't planning on buying them any toys and she is out of money. B also found these little Playmobile pirates. They are like $2.99. Not a big deal. But still, as we walked around I started thinking of all the toys they have at home that aren't played with. I started feeling guilty, like I should not give in to them just because they are inexpensive. I also was thinking of the week previous. J was home sick, really sick, with a bad double ear infection. She was so pathetic and sick, while at the pharmacy I totally caved and bought her this trick/magic set for like $6, it was such a waste of money if you saw what was in it. She played with it for one day. I also thought of the past few weeks. My husband bought them a little something a couple weeks back. They also got some stuff from their grandparents. They have all these toys they don't even truly know all they have. Pathetic really.

So, towards the end of the shopping I said "I am not punishing you, you both were very good. I just do not think you need these toys so we are not going to buy them today." B has his own money and I still did not let him just because he has some similar toys at home already that he does not play with. B was sad but ok. J started having this major meltdown for like the whole time we were checking out. She first would not give me the toy, then I started the 1-2-3 and by 3 she handed it over but still was freaking out. It was totally out of control. It is like she lost control of her emotions. This shows me that she is not told "no" enough, and she needs to learn disappointment a little better. I feel like I have messed up with her. She is our baby and we seem to cater to her in some ways. Even her brother hates to see her upset. He said "mom, get her the toy. you don't have to buy mine." Is that the saddest thing?? He hates her upset. Being upset is part of life and this was a lesson for the kids and for me. Say no!!

I have to say, we usually do not venture to the toy area for this reason. They always find something they just LOVE and it is the most amazing wonderful toy ever made. I typically shop alone or stay in just the grocery area. When we have to buy gifts is when we go to the toy area. I should not have to avoid the toy area, and next time I will make it very clear they won't be getting anything. I know it was probably confusing for them, as I told them they could hold onto the toys but I changed my mind about buying them. Is that wrong??? What do you think?

On another note, it is snowing. Like really snowing. Big, wet snowflakes. And it is APRIL!