My Moments in Time

Roxy

2011-01-22T07:34:00.000-08:00

Our little Pomeranian Roxy is 12 years old. Lately, she is really showing her age more. She still has bright eyes and a wagging tail, but she can hardly hear and she coughs a lot, and she has these "episodes" that have to do with her heart (the vet thinks). She is on 2 heart meds. She sleeps a lot (although that isn't really very new). I realize that she might not wake up some morning. The hardest issue right now is that we really can't leave her for long periods, like over night. We have a couple of weekend trips in March and I'm stressed about what we are going to do with her. We used to bring her to the kennel, but I know that would put too much stress on her. She used to go there, and when she would come home, she would cry and breathe funny for hours, then sleep for 2 days straight. I think bringing her to my parents would stress her out also. I don't know what to do. She is such a good dog, and I just want her to be comfortable and happy. I have been making her extra people food - eggs, meat, cheese... all her favorites. She gets lots of dog treats. I am glad she is still eating well, if she weren't I would have a hard time keeping her with us. I feel like she has a decent quality of life right now. I'm not ready to let her go. I don't feel the time is right. I know she got the back seat once the kids arrived, but she was my first baby, the first time I had to care for something other than myself! She is my little puffball. Foxy Roxy (she was named Roxy because she looks like a little fox!). She still runs in circles when she has to go outside. She still runs around the yard, even when it is -15 outside. She loves walks, and I hate that she can't go on them anymore (the vet thinks it is too hard on her heart). If I say the word walk, she starts running in circles. She runs up the stairs every night to sleep on her bed in our bedroom. She has been the best little pet you can imagine!!

Love the Fight

2011-01-20T08:24:00.000-08:00

I can't believe I'm a wrestling mom. I grew up in a hockey household, with 2 younger brothers. I had very little exposure to wrestling growing up. I knew a couple of wrestlers in high school, and I know they ate very little and never had much energy. I am praying Bret never has to cut weight. I have been a wrestling mom for going on 6 years now. It pretty much takes over our lives from Nov-March, and he has other thing (camps, practices, etc) pretty much year round. He is the hardest worker I know, he never complains and asks every weekend to go to tournaments. He is very competitive and works hard to win. He does not always win, which is a good lesson, but hard for him. He knows that he has to practice hard to be a good wrestler, and I admire his determination. It is difficult for kids these days, they have to pick a sport and put everything into that sport. They will fall behind if they don't, which is too bad. Kids no longer play a sport for just that season (baseball in spring for example). They have to go to year round camps and training to be good enough to keep playing. And even then, with the big schools, they might not make the high school team someday. I like wrestling because it really teaches you to be disciplined. It also teaches kids to work hard, be a good sport, and I think that being on the wrestling team will help Bret in life forever. We love his coach Vic, and we are sad this is his last year in youth wrestling (next year will be on the middle school team). I looked at his team pictures this year, and there he was, in the back row. He is one of the "big kids" this year, after I always saw him as the "little kid". He is the oldest. 6 years, in a blink of an eye. My little tough guy, is growing up. He is almost a little man now. Some things he does and says are no longer "boy". He is more than I ever hoped for. I am so proud of him, and I love him more every day!!!

Winter Blues

2011-01-15T09:27:00.001-08:00

This has been the winter of snow, snow, and more snow. I can't believe it. It was nice and pretty in December but now it is January, and not so nice anymore. I sometimes questions why anyone lives in MN!!! I guess we must be a little crazy!!!

We are busy with wrestling, gymnastics, piano, church school, work, and trying to fit in a little relaxation in there somewhere. This is our weekly schedule:

Mondays - both kids church school, Bret wrestling practice (Mat Mondays)
Tuesdays - Bret wrestling (Rogers Area), Jenna gymnastics
Wednesdays - Jenna piano lessons, Bret wrestling on some wednesdays (Pinnacle)
Thursdays - Bret wrestling (Rogers), and Jenna will be starting Hip Hop dancing next week
* thursdays are hard because I work almost every thursday, plus Brian is starting a basketball league thursday nights!!!
Fridays - FREE (except I work every other :( )
Saturdays - Wrestling tournaments
Sundays - Wrestling tournaments, and practice Sunday nights (Pinnacle)

As you can see, we are a total wrestling family. I worry he will burn out, but he is such a hard worker and always wants more, more, more!

I am trying my hardest to let Jenna participate in what she wants as well. She did great in basketball this year (ended in Nov), and I am trying to talk her into soccer this spring (the only sport I really understand!) but she isn't too thrilled. She loves dance and gymnastics, so I might sign her up for dance this summer. I am not a big dance mom type, but I know she would enjoy it. I don't know if our wallets will like it, from what I've heard of dance it is pretty spendy!!

I am still working every other weekend, and I am hoping I can get to every 3rd weekend someday. I really miss spending time with the family on weekends. I do enjoy having time off during the week to volunteer at school, do things around the house, and get the kids off to school each morning. I know I would have a hard time going back to Mon-Fri days.

The kids are just growing and changing so fast. I will post some pictures soon. I have to work today so I'm just doing a quick post. I hope to get this site updated more often. I say that a lot, but let's see if I can stick to it!!!

The first snow

2010-11-17T07:59:00.000-08:00

We have a layer of new snow on the ground, the first snowfall was this past Saturday. We all thought it would melt, but it has stuck around, the kids seem to be enjoying it. For me, it seems like I'm not quite ready for snow...for winter... for the holidays. November is suddenly here in full force. Frigid temperatures right around the corner. The basketball season is wrapping up, the football season long over. Wrestling will be here soon, taking up our every weekend and many weeknights. The kids have started to request hot chocolate with whipped cream. I believe winter may be here!

Summer Schedule

2010-06-07T14:57:00.001-07:00

I am torn as to how I feel about summer quickly approaching. In some ways I love the sleeping in, knowing that we don't have to be anywhere (most days), and the fun in the sun. In other ways I dread the "togetherness", especially the kids. They tend to fight a lot as it is....I need a way to encourage them getting along, and being nice to each other. A reward system of some kind. I've tried them in the past, but none have lasted long. I am just hoping to keep my patience and make the best of our time together!!

3 more days of school!!!

June 5, 2010

2010-06-04T23:37:00.001-07:00

Springtime, end of the school year is around the corner, time for summer, family, sun, water, sleeping in, grilling, music, fairs, rides, biking, walking, grass, popsicles, kickball, waterguns, sprinklers.

Bret:
wrestler
intense
stubborn
loyal
convincing
intellectual

Jenna:
gymnast
carefree
stubborn
sensitive
spoiled
squirmy

Picture post

2010-01-05T11:39:00.001-08:00

My Waterfod ornaments. One of my best friends used to work there, and she gave me one every year for years. I LOVE them!!!

The tree this year. The kids wanted colored lights but I talked them into all white. We did colored lights on the basement tree.

Bret really wanted this Nerf gun, you can't tell but it is very long and huge. He loves it!

Kids playing outside the day after Christmas. It was actually warm enough then (it is not warm enough now to playoutside). I even went out and we built an igloo fort. We had snow for 3 days straight over Christmas. Bret has an icicle in his mouth. Cute huh?

All the kids together. An after the holiday dinner out. This is the first year all 4 kids have been with each other on the actual holiday. This was on Dec 26 at an Irish Pub.

Jenna and her big sister Brooke, who lives in Texas.

Jenna holding her most wanted gift, Lulu the cat. This cat actually moves and makes sounds like a real cat!

Brian, Bret, Blake and Kiah.

Bret at Grandma and Papa's house, waiting to open presents.

Grandma and the kids. She bought the girls matching Christmas dresses.

Bret decorating reindeer cookies. They were so cute!

Jenna and her cousin Kiah. Jenna is 6 weeks older than Kiah and they are both in 2nd grade. Grandma (my mom) got them matching Christmas dresses.

Christmas 2009

2009-12-28T14:04:00.000-08:00

Pictures to come later!!! I received a new Canon Powershot for my xmas gift (picked out and ordered off amazon by yours truely). I love it so far, but have to figure out downloading. I have lots of xmas shots to post.

Recap:
Dec 23: Stepdaughter arrives from Texas and stepson from Iowa. First time in so long that we have all been together with all the kids for the holidays. And first time they have been here for xmas. They settle into the basment.

Dec 24: xmas eve at my side, my parents house. Not too big of a group: my family, my brother and neice, my parents, my aunt and uncle, and my one cousin. I don't see my cousin often so that was a nice surprise that she was there. We watched the kids open presents and had prime rib, wine, and lots of desserts. Drove home in the snow and got the cookies out for santa. Jenna wrote him a note. Kids in bed before 11 so that was good in my opinion. They were very excited!

Dec 25: xmas day, snowed in! The kids didn't wake up until 7:30 and 8:00 so that was later than I expected. They took turns unwrapping presents and we played all day in our PJ's. My parents came over and we had chili for a late lunch. Very relaxing day. No stress, no travel, no worry. Brian spent much of the day shoveling and snowblowing. It was a winter wonderland!

Dec 27: stepkids went home :( Quiet in the house. Played in the snow with the kids, built a fort, sled down the hill in the back. Another day at home. Getting stir crazy.

Dec 28: taking down xmas stuff. Trees still up though. Will tackle that later. Went out shopping a bit. Got a few xmas items for next year. Feel some relief it is over but also sad it is over. You know how that is. The kids have lots of fun new stuff to play with. I have to work Thur, fri, and Sat. Bummer but so nice to have this long break.

Merry Christmas. Another great one for us, lots of fun memories!

2009 Annual Christmas Photo

2009-12-18T11:52:00.001-08:00

~Work~

2009-12-18T11:46:00.000-08:00

Work is one of those things. Most have to do it. Not all enjoy it. I was a stay at home mom for 6 years. It is hard for me to work now. I admit it. I would rather be home. I went to school to start a new career and I have to say I still don't love going to work. I don't hate it. Some days are good, some days not so good. I don't get excited to go. I wish I were one of those people who had a passion for their work. I maybe still have to find that passion in life and make a living at it. I don't know. I just know I'm not there. I like helping people. I like being there for someone in need. I just don't feel that I am where I'm supposed to be, if that makes any sense. I work this weekend, all weekend. Working gets health insurance for my family. That part helps. Knowing I am doing that for my family. But being away from them 9 hours a day all weekend is hard. Very hard.

So Full

2009-12-17T20:26:00.000-08:00

Do you ever feel so full of love for your kids that you just don't know how to describe it? That you want to kiss them and hug them and hold them all day and tell them how important they are, how special they each are, how you love them more than they will ever know? I feel that way today and can't even put it to words. That they are my life, what is the most important things to me and always will be. That even when I get mad that I love them more than life itself. That if they ever hurt they will have a soft place with me? I feel like the years are passing so quickly, that they are growing so fast. I know all mothers feel this way. It is an amazing thing, this thing we call life. I love these 2 like I never thought possible.

Funny kids

2009-12-16T21:26:00.000-08:00

Bret and Jenna get an allowance and can it can increase or decrease depending on what they do, their attitude, how helpful and nice they are etc. They get a blue chip for "good" stuff which = $1 and a red chip for "not so good stuff" which is minus $1. So, anyway, they both got a blue chip for doing their homework today, and Jenna got an extra for being helpful to Bret when he asked for something. Bret then says "I should get a blue chip for all the suffering I have at school." He then proceeded to say "well, it is fun sometimes but a lot of work."

Jenna has been taking a long time to walk the few blocks home from school lately. I asked her yesterday why she has been taking such a long time and she said "well mom, I have to stop and eat a lot of snow."

My kids, they make me smile every day!!!

Early AM

2009-12-15T05:50:00.000-08:00

The kids are still nestled snug in the beds, and they will soon be out in the frigid MN cold going to school. The snow is here to stay. I shoveled the driveway as best as I could on my own yesterday. My husband is gone for work so I'm on my own until Friday. The kitchen is a mess, the house needs picked up, I have to workout, I'm tired, but I'm happy to just be alive and healthy today. That is all that matters. Family, health, waking up to the bright beautiful snow today. Very blessed!

The 12 Days of Christmas

2009-12-14T20:14:00.000-08:00

Actually, 11 days left and counting. The kids wake up every morning and open their advent calendar door for the day, eating their little chocolate first thing, even before breakfast! The are so excited for Christmas. I am sad that one day it won't hold this same magic for them, but right now it is so fun to see their excitement. I have most of my cards sent, most of my presents wrapped, tree up and decorated since after thanksgiving, lights up, and we are all set. I am so excited that I have xmas off this year, and after working this weekend I will have until new years eve off from work. I am determined to NOT stress this year, to enjoy my family, to "go with the flow" without any expectations. To just be in the moment. I want to treasure these moments with my children. Create memories for them to hold onto.

Tonight after brushing teeth, I told them "meet me by the Christmas tree" and we sat under the tree and read "The 12 Days of Christmas". We have the super cool pop up book and the kids love it. Each year we try to read a lot of Christmas books in the days leading up to the big day. We were all singing the song and having fun. My husband is out of town for work, so it is just the kids and I this week. It is hard for me when he is gone, because I get overtired from not sleeping well and having to do all the house and kids stuff. My goal is to get through the week without getting too crabby and just trying to have fun with the kids in the evenings. I think we succeeded tonight.

Do not cave into the pressure!!!

2009-12-01T14:55:00.000-08:00

The new, hot toy this year is the Zhu Zhu pet hamster. A pretty silly toy from the looks of it, but could be something fun for the right kid. My daughter, age 7, loves animals. She has a few of those Fur Real pets and really likes those. Her number one request from Santa this year was a big realistic robotic cat named LuLu (Fur Real). I found it on sale, and Santa will be bringing her LuLu, much to my dismay. This cat kind of creeps me out. Anyway, these new hot Zhu Zhu's look right up her alley, and for $8.99 I decided to try to find out. I have not mentioned them much to her because I know they are really hard to find in the stores. Anyway, every so often I'll check online or at the store to see if I can get lucky. No such luck. I want to tell everyone who is buying these silly toys for $40, $50, or more, to STOP!!!! This is the reason that no one else can get these toys for their kids. The ebay'ers and craigslisters are stalking the stores, stalking the online sites, and buying them all out before anyone else can get them. They are then marking up the prices by 400% or more and trying to sell them (and succeeding) to all the stupid people willing to pay this much for a TOY. HAMSTER. A tiny, not even so cute, robotic hamster. People GET REAL!!! This is a toy!!! Not even a really amazing one at that. STOP paying $50 for these things, then we could all get them. Does it not make sense? If everyone stops buying them for these ridiculous prices, then there would be no need for the childless 60 yr old male to buy 100 of them off the shelf and try to mark them up to make a fast buck. It frustrates me to no end. Get a grip people.

Hello Stranger!

2009-09-30T20:25:00.001-07:00

I found my blog again. I really want to document out lives, and I've been so bad about blogging. I am not sure if a paper journal would work better, or if I should try this again. I'll see what I can do! Things are back in full swing in our home with the kids in school, sports, piano, etc. Bret is in 4th grade, he is getting so big and grown up. He is so independent. He is at the point where it is no longer cool to have your mom walk to you into school or anything. He did ask me to come to lunch last week so there is still that. I love to see them grow, but sometimes it really is hard!!! Jenna is in 2nd grade and still is ok being seen with me. She loves school, they both do really. Jenna really likes it, Bret doesn't like the homework but still is all ready to go each morning. Bret will actually leave the house 15 min before he has to so he can socialize at the corner. He speeds off on his scooter every morning. Soon enough it will be too cold and snowy so I guess they should enjoy walking while they can. Jenna likes to dilly dally in the mornings but she gets there just in time. Here is our week:
Mondays: Church school, football practice
Tues: gymnastics, football game
Wed: piano lessons for both kids
Thur: football practice or game
Fri-Sun off for now but once wrestling starts that all changes.
I now work 3 days per week.
What my kids are into:
Bret: football and baseball cards, playing with friends (laser tag outside, kickball, football, riding bikes), video games (DS and Wii), Gormiti action figures, collects erasers this year!!!
Jenna: American Girl dolls (got her first one this past b-day, Chrissa), loves stuffed animals, playing house and restaurant with her friends, drawing, coloring, playing office
Ok, that is a start at an update. Hope to have more to come!!!!!!

Should I stay or should I go?

2009-02-27T09:19:00.000-08:00

Well, hi there! I am debating whether to continue my blog. For many reasons, I am unable to post regularly. I don't have much to say, I'm busy, I am on facebook, I just don't feel inspired. Not sure what it is. I started out trying to do this as a record of my life and my kids. If I could keep doing that, or start doing that I should say, I'd love to keep it open. I want to write down the things I know I'll eventually forget. I love the "idea" of blogging. However, loving and doing are different right? So, for now I'm just keeping it open and trying to be more on top of writing. If I fail, I may have to stop. I am on facebook and keep up with that, but that isn't really a record of my life. It is just little snippits here and there. Anyway.... on to the big updates:

Jenna:
Jenna is 6 1/2 and full of energy. Jenna is an all or nothing kind of kid. She is very enthusiatic and knows what she wants. She started piano lessons and had her first recital last week. So cute! She had only had about 3 lessons so it was great she got up there by herself and played. She played a cute little song called "beep, beep". She wore a fancy dress and we got her a "good luck" balloon and some roses for luck. I played as a kid and it was so fun to see my daughter up there playing. I want to get Bret started in piano once wrestling slows down. Since we have a piano I want both kids to at least try it.
Jenna loves first grade. She is very social and has many best friends. She enjoys reading and attempts to read chapter books. She wants so much to do things that bigger kids do. I'm in no hurry for her to grow up!! She loves to sing and dance. She loves to draw and write. She likes to play restaurant and with her baby dolls. She has so many baby dolls, her favorites being her "Baby Alive" ones. She uses the money she saves up to buy dolls usually. She tries to keep her room clean, and to her, that means little piles of things all over. She has her own way of setting up her spaces and she loves her stuff. She says that her favorite place is her room.
Jenna loves her brother but they fight a lot lately. She wants to play with him but they tend to argue and both have strong personalities. I really want them to get along and we are working on it!!! When they do play nice, Jenna will come to me and say "Bret is playing with me nicely!" and she is overjoyed. She really does look up to him.

Bret:
Bret turned 9 a few weeks ago. 9!! So old and I can't believe it!!! He had his party just how he planned it. Here at the house with his 5 close friends, playing laser tag in the basement and wii. He had it all planned in his head and stuck to what he wanted despite us trying to urge him to have it elsewhere (You know how parties at the house are such a mess!) They rotated playing laser tag and Wii and all the kids really seemed to love it. I find that 9 year old boys are really pretty well behaved. They listen (for the most part) and didn't destroy anything. We had Bret's favorite dessert, chocolate chip cookies with ice cream on top. I set up a sundae bar and had lots of fun toppings and they all made their own sundae. We also had cupcakes but the boys all wanted just ice cream. Bret admitted that when people sing to him "it is hard not to smile". So cute! He also brought donuts to school, this is kind of a tradition for him also. It is one of his favorite treats and he requests them each year for his b-day treat at snack time. He loves video games and we have had to really limit his time. Now, they are for weekends only. He seems to lose focus on school work if he gets to play during the week. He is doing well in school, but always was thinking of when he could play his games. So, this has worked better. He also likes to build and play bionicles and just spent his birthday money on amazon for some new ones. He asks me daily if they shippped and is patiently awaiting their arrival.
He is getting towards the end of wrestling season and we have the big state tournament March 13-15. We go to a hotel and have fun with the other families. The boys have such a good time hanging out. Bret loves to play with friends and hang out with other kids. He is my strong willed child and once he gets an idea in his head it sticks. He tends to try to boss the rest of us around, and will probably be a leader of something someday. He says he is going to develop video games as an adult. He also really enjoys working with special ed kids at school. A least 4 teachers have approached me about how good he is with these kids and how patient. It makes me so proud. I know some kids are scared or nervous around other kids that are "different" than them, but Bret helps them and loves to get to know them.

Me:
Working 3-4 days per week, it is going pretty well. Some days better than others. It is a long learning process. I'm grateful to have a job as nurses are not having an easy time lately. There have been layoffs around here and no jobs really out there. There are lots of hiring freezes. I never thought nursing would be like this!!! I am exercising 3-4 times per week at the YMCA. I joined a few weeks ago and love it. I have not changed my eating like I should so that is the next part!! I also spend time reading, cleaning/fixing up the house, volunteering at the kids school, and driving the kids around. I am going on a girls night tomorrow at the MOA. Can't wait. It's been quite the week with my husband out of town for work, big snowstorm yesterday, and just lots to do!!!!

That is life right now!!!!

Frigid

2008-12-22T08:02:00.000-08:00

I am still around, still alive up here in the frigid north. I am telling you, it has been below zero degree for most of the last week, and with windchill it is about -3o, no lie. It is cold. So cold that you don't even want to step outside. Getting the kids ready for school is a chore because they have to get so bundled up and we can't walk and have to drive in every day. I drop them off right at the door so they don't have to be out long. And then they don't get to have outdoor recess so the whole school is full of kids with all their pent up energy. I'm hoping for a warm front soon, even something above 0 would feel warm right now!
Christmas is coming so soon and I still have a few gifts to buy. I have to wrap and prepare the kids gifts. I have to work 4 hours on xmas eve and 8 hr xmas day. I am a little bummed but I am off at 3pm on xmas eve and that is the day we do most of our celebrating. I also know that next year I will have it off! YAY! It helps that I get paid a lot extra to work that day, and I can pay for most of the gifts we bought just by working one day.
I have been busy with work and wrestling season has started. I am the team photographer so I'm busy with that. We have tournaments each weekend and always on the go! I am trying to find something to keep J busy, piano maybe or gymnastics. She really is happy just being at home with me when she isn't at school. She loves school but likes being with mom too! B is loving being with his wrestling buds again. He is growing so fast, almost 8 yr old.
Wishing everyone a happy holiday!

America has spoken

2008-11-04T22:31:00.000-08:00

I am beyond happy with the election results. I waited anxiously for months for this day. Never have I been so excited about a presidential candidate. I have always voted. I have always tried to be informed about politics. However, I have never CARED as much as I do today. I have never been so nervous and excited about an election. I have been an Obama supporter from the very earliest days of his campaign. I never considered the alternative. Maybe I'm stuck in my ways, but I'm a true democrat at heart and always will be. Yes, I voted for Gore and Kerry but I never felt as much hope as I do now for Barack Obama. I finally feel like we have a truly good person in the white house. A good man, a good leader. I have nothing against John McCain. I think he is a good man also. I think he has worked hard, and served his country. I would only want the best for either candidate if they won. I would never have voted for him, but I don't have anything against him (well maybe the Palin selection but that is another post!) Anyway, the night is over and I'm looking forward to a new tomorrow. Obama has brought hope to so many and we may be on our way to a brighter future. God Bless America!!!

hello! Happy Halloween!

2008-10-31T11:33:00.000-07:00

We might have a "nice" weather halloween this year for once. It is in the 60's I believe, probably 50's by tonight. But much better than the frigid weather we have most years. I am looking forward to a fun night and am happy and grateful to have work off. J is going to be a witch and B a demon type creature. This is the first year he really wanted something kind of scary. Hope he doesn't scare the little kids. J has a parade at school in an hour or so, she is a cat. They had to dress up like a story book character. They can't actually celebrate "halloween" (dumb) so the younger kids do this up to 1st grade. B is too old now I guess... :(
Not much too exciting in our lives. I am still working hard and bringing in a paycheck sure is nice. I now make money to cover my monthly credit card bill and most of the house payment. It feels good. Hubby changed his job also to be an independent contractor rather than working for his employer so he is making more per hour as well. So, hopefully in the future we can save up a little more, and have a little extra for things such as trips etc. I really want to build a house someday but with the housing market that isn't looking promising for a while.
We finished up football and have a couple more basketball games left. Then wrestling starts Dec 1. J may take up gymnastics this winter. I've been doing aerobics classes this week and am so sore. It feels good but reminds me that I really should stay active on a regular basis. I'm going to try not to eat too much chocolate tonight.
Wish me luck.
Happy Halloween!!!

Update

2008-10-14T21:35:00.000-07:00

I am getting ready to go to bed after a long week of being a single parent. Hubby gets home tomorrow night, after being gone an entire week. I worked 2 days since he's been gone and have been lucky enough to have my parents help out. But I'm exhausted. I just don't sleep well alone and plus with staying up late for work 2 nights and getting up early for school I just am sleep deprived. I don't ever nap either. I should, but there is never enough time. I have so many other things I need to do.
J has a field trip tomorrow and I am really kind of sad because I didn't get picked to go. Only 5 parents were allowed to go and I wasn't chosed from the drawing. I have gone on every field trip of the kids except one for B (also didn't get chosen!) and I just feel like something is missing. I think she is ok with it but we will see tomorrow. I can tell she is a little nervous but she hasn't cried or anything. She seems to be looking forward to it, but she is a creature of routine and this will be out of her normal comfort zone. Plus, my kids walk to school so she isn't used to the bus. I'm hoping and praying it goes well for both of us. I'm sure I'll be a nervous wreck all day not being with my baby.
B is done with football and enjoying some time off to just hang out and play with friends. Wrestling starts in December. He loves to play with friends every day and is such a social kid.
My job is going ok. I am starting to feel like the honeymoon is over and reality is setting in. I am nervous to be on my own (in a month or less) and have not felt confident lately. I'm hoping that in time that feeling goes away. I know all new RN's go through these feelings but it is hard.
Today I spent way too much money. Got both kids winter coats at Old Navy. I was not thinking last spring to buy some while on clearance. Oh well. They seem to be of good quality and may last 2 years. I have to get boots for B. I did find some for J on clearance last year. My requirement is that they have a removable inside. I will probably spend at least $30 on those. I have to make sure I have snowpants for both kids also.
I also bought myself a pair of black lined suede boots. I have a brown pair I wore a lot last year and know I'll wear these. They were $30 at Target. Not terribly expensive but more than I like to spend on really anything!! But I really know I will use them and they will match my winter coats. They are just so warm and cozy I wear them everywhere.
I have tomorrow off. I am meeting a friend to do a scrapbooking calendar class. I also have to pay some bills, clean up around the house, and watch the debate. I've worked every other debate so this will be my first one I get to watch. Looking forward to it, even though they never seem to give any straight answers. I got my Obama sign and t-shirt delivered this week. I was thinking they were not going to come as orders are backed up but just in time to get some use out of them a couple weeks. I put the sign up a couple days ago, and I think I'm the only one with an Obama sign in my neighborhood. Not many people have up presidential signs but the ones I've seen are all McCain. We live in a pretty conservative area I guess. I also heard that you can't wear any t-shirts etc to the polls or they won't let you vote? Any truth to that?? I probably wouldn't anyway, but that is interesting.
Almost midnight, so good night!

Election

2008-10-08T10:01:00.001-07:00

Well, election time is just around the corned. I'm really sick of the ads on TV. I would totally respect any candidate who would just refuse to sink to that level of "he did this, she did this, this person is the worst person in the whole world, how could you ever vote for him/her". I don't even pay attention anymore. Hate it.
Anyway, I'm a total Obama voter. Nothing will change my mind. I have been a fan of his ever since he first started to be known. I seriously am wishing and praying he wins. I don't dislike McCain or Palin, I just don't see anything in them that would make me vote for them. I think they all have their faults, as we all do. And all we can do is try to make the best choice and vote. EVERYONE NEEDS TO VOTE!!!!
I'm anxiously awaiting voting day and you should be too!

My beautiful kids

2008-09-23T07:35:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I just have to sit back and remind myself to slow down and treasure the moments. My kids are growing so fast before my eyes. It sometimes is hard to remember when they were babies, toddlers, even preschoolers. They are just developing into these wonderful little people. Jenna is 6 now and I love how independent she is becoming. She still definately loves her momma but she goes to school every day and is doing so well. She is a highly emotional kid who thrives on routine, consistency, and limits. She needs boundaries and a place to let go (home). She is able to behave really well at school but her outlet is home where she sometimes has to have a little "break down" or emotional time. I am proud of how well she does and how she follows rules and listens. She can be challenging as she likes things a certain way "her way" and she doesn't always get that. She is probably the most inflexible member of our family (somewhat like her father!). She has the loudest voice and most demanding personality. But all these things make her my girl. She is almost everything I am not. This is what keeps me on my toes. Despite her challenges, she is loving to the point of wanting to be next to me as much as possible. I sometimes call her "shadow" due to her always being with me. She loves to draw, play with dolls and friends, and read. She admires her big brother, even when he doesn't want her to. She is such a sweet and loving child!

Bret is 8 and has transitioned to wanting his mom to keep her distance (especially at school). He is so funny in that if I am at the school he will look at me out of the corner of his eye and give me a little wave but nothing too dramatic. Luckily, he is still ok with me volunteering at school and even asked me to have lunch with him last week. We aren't yet to the age where I'm too embarassing!! Bret is a passionate child whose brain is always working. He is always thinking of things and planning. He loves books and usually has a couple favorites that he is looking at. He isn't necessarily a big reader but he loves intricate illustrations and studying them. His favorite are monsters, dragons, and Where's Waldo books. He told me "I bet that illustrator is really proud of these drawings!". His personality is more like mine, laid back. Not much bothers Bret and he goes with the flow. Change is ok with him and he does not get upset, even at times he should! He loves to play with his peers and they can spend hours playing in the backyard. He also loves video games and the computer. He is active in sports but also likes downtime at home. He is such a smart kid, and funny too. I just love both of my kids so much and wish I could bottle them up at each age so I could go back and just remember.

So sorry

2008-09-21T10:42:00.001-07:00

I finally remembered that I have a blog. My brian is full to the brim and some things have just been forgotten. With kids school, work, sports, housework, etc I have been more than busy. Good busy. Work is going great. I have a really busy week coming up. Last week was pretty easy (3 day shifts for training). This week I have one day of training and many days on the floor. I am now ACLS (Advanced Cardiac Life Support) certified, and in another week I will (hopefully) be PALS (Pediatric Advanced Life Support) certified. I have to pass both written and practical exams to get the card. It is a lot of reading, studying, etc but at least very practical stuff that I can use on the job. I also will be taking a TNCC (Trauma Nurse Core Course) in the future. I also have classes on RN orientation, and many others. It is so much to learn. I still am happy with where I am and hopefully where I am going!
The kids are doing great in school. They are back into the swing of things and no big issues. J still would prefer me not to work but she is handling things great. She loves school and has started basketball. Her first game was yesterday it was very entertaining!! She lost her first tooth Thursday night, she was so excited. The tooth fairy brought $5 and a cute note!
B has had lots of homework and that isn't his favorite but he is doing great. I can't believe he is in 3rd grade. He is the quarterback on his football team, the Green Machines! They have only won one game but he is doing such a great job. We are so proud of him. He also wrestles on Sunday nights and will start back with full time wrestling in December. His best subject is probably spelling, he hasn't missed one word this year. His memory for facts is also really great. He is such a smart kid.
Both of my kids just are the best!!!
My husband is out of town until last Tuesday night so we have a busy couple of days ahead of us. We will get through it with a smile if I can help it!

Scrapbooking...without the mess.....

2008-08-29T12:19:00.000-07:00

I don't even know what it is called....online scrapbooking??? Digital scrapbooking??? I just know that I am interested in starting to scrapbook my pictures on the computer using some type of website or program that will also print my pages for me (and send them) so I can stop the guilt about my lack of scrapbooking. I have figured out that I really like the creative side but am getting bogged down with all the supplies, paper, mess, plus hauling it around is just really difficult. I do have a lot of scrapbooking supplies so I'm not sure I want to give it up completely but I just get discouraged when I'm so far behind and not feeling that creative energy. I don't know if doing it on the computer will be any easier but I think that it will be for me. I know I've heard of sites that you can get free kits and I supposed you need photoshop or something to help put the pages together, then they will print it and send it to you for a fee. Has to be cheaper than buying all the supples to make a page.

I am a member of snapfish and I know they have books you can make but I'm thinking something with a few more options and layouts.

Can anyone help me get started? What are the basics I need?? I am just lost as to where to begin.....

Real Life RN

2008-08-22T20:13:00.000-07:00

It is so weird to be a real RN now. I think back to all the years of classes. The General Biology, the General Psych, then finally entering nursing school. The nervous anxiety of clinical days, the first time I took someone's vital signs. I remember the transition from first year to second year student. How I felt more confident but still "just" a student nurse. I felt as though I would never be one of those "real" nurses, who had the RN behind their name. Who could make decisions and take care of patients on their own. Well, I have arrived. I am a real nurse now. I am responsible for my patients and have my own license on the line now. I am able to take out medications on my own and give them without an instructor or preceptor with me. No one checks to make sure I have the right medication or that I am verifying the right patient. I am all on my own (I still have a preceptor but she lets me do things independently a LOT). It is nervewracking and cool all at once. I check things a million times because the last thing I want is an error. I question myself and I ask questions. I sometimes have to tell myself I can do this, I earned this, I know what I am supposed to do and I just have to DO it. I am smart enough and I am a good critical thinker. I don't know if I'll ever get past the fact that I have people's lives in my hands. Being an emergency room nurse has it's own set of challenges and obstacles. As a new RN it is a scary place. It forces me to think fast, and to make decisions. It forces me to use all of my skills and learn what I need to know to be a safe nurse. It is a very steep learning curve but I think I'm up to the task.

Filler

2008-08-16T21:36:00.000-07:00

A. Attached or single? Married
B. Best friend? My husband and my 6 best girlfriends who I have known forever.
C. Cake or pie? Pie
D. Day of choice? Friday
E. Essential items? computer, car, makeup, cute purse, comfy shoes
F. Favorite color? Red
G. Gummy bears or worms? Neither
H. Hometown? Larger size suburb of Minneapolis, MN
I. Favorite indulgence? Chocolate, pizza, restaurant food, french fries
J. January or July? July
K. Kids? 2
L. Life Isn't Complete Without? my family and home
M. Marriage date? October 24 (10 years this year!)
N. Number of brothers or sisters? 2 brothers
O. Oranges or apples? Apples, honeycrisp are my favorite for the few months they are available
P. Phobias? Clausterphobia
Q. Quotes? not really
R. Reasons to smile? Watching my kids
S. Season of Choice? fall
T. Tag 5 people. Anyone who reads this blog (all 3 people!)
U. Unknown fact about me. I don't have any secrets! Can't think of anything unknown.
V. Vacation of choice? Anywhere tropical, with an ocean
W. Worst habit? I bite my nails
X. X-ray or Ultrasound? what kind of questions is this???
Y. Your favorite food? PF Changs orange chicken, california rolls, anything with chocolate
Z. Zodiac sign? Aries

List of random thoughts

2008-08-10T20:41:00.001-07:00

I am so tired and just can't get everything done in time for work tomorrow early in the morning.

I have to get the kids up by 6:30 to get them to daycare by 7:15
DH is gone, this is why I am doing daycare drop off early the next few days
My kids don't like to get up that early
Luckily they like going to daycare!
I have to work 4 days this week, more than I typically will work and more than I want to
I have EKG class mon, and welcome days on the floor Tues-Thur
I had a great girls weekend
The kids behaved for grandma and uncle/aunt
However, J (as usual) started acting up for me almost imediately
Luckily, I handled it in stride and the night ended well with both kids sound asleep in minutes
It cost $70 to have the dog in the kennel from fri-sun. This seems excessive.
I did not finish my EKG homework for tomorrow
I have not put away the laundry from friday
I have not unpacked
I have spent too much time checking email and facebook
I need to get to get my clothes ready for tomorrow
I think I will eat in the cafeteria rather than pack a lunch
I am feeling very lazy
I did not do anything all weekend except watch movies, drink cocktails, go boating, lay in the sun, read magazines, and make jewelry and cards
I'm off to bed, 'night!

yes, still alive

2008-08-07T14:55:00.000-07:00

I have been a working woman since July 28, and wow have I been busy. It doesn't help that I'm not used to getting up in the early hours of the morning (why I took an evening position!) and all this training is quite early. I had to be up around 5am 2 days this week due to a long commute to a training center and having to be there at 7am. I'm beat.
I am heading out for girls weekend tomorrow. It hasn't been easy to arrange as my husband got called out of town yesterday for work unexpectedly, so I had to find childcare last minute. Luckily my mom is taking them 1 night and my brother the next. I go away one weekend every summer with my 6 best friends. I have known them since I was a kid and we still are the best of friends. It is great. So, having worked all week, I am busy today getting myself and the kids ready for the weekend. I really need to get some rest tonight.
Sorry so short but things are going well. Work is good, kids are good, I am good.

Facebook

2008-07-23T12:22:00.000-07:00

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1067950299

I joined facebook a few weeks back (or months?) and just recently started playing around. It is kind of fun. I have found a few old faces, which is always neat.

Our summer is so busy right now. Baseball playoffs, VBS, football camp, birthdays, my job, DH traveling for work, and fitting in millions of playdates. My kids LOVE playdates with a passion. It is hard to find one every day though. They just love their friends.

I am about to deep clean my house, it is a mess.

I'm back...!!!!

2008-07-21T07:51:00.000-07:00

My computer has been on the fritz and I had not had the motivation to log on to another computer but I figured I better update my blog. Not much is going on around here. Summer is slip sliding away as it always does. We have spent lots of time at our camper, on the boat, tubing, having lots of fun. I've spent lots of time with the kids and in a week I will be a working mom once again. I am excited, nervous, terrified, and happy about my new job. Some days I can't wait, and some days I don't want my start date to come! I know all will work out just fine.

The kids are doing great. We had Jenna's birthday party last Friday. I have to post all about my big 6 year old. We had a small party at the house, it went great. Bret is finishing up baseball season and they both go to VBS next week.

Sorry to be so brief but have lots to do today. I will post again soon!

forgetful

2008-06-22T20:29:00.001-07:00

I seriously forget about blogging. I check other people's blogs but never think to update mine. What is my problem? I actually have time to blog now, and I am blogging less than ever. I am listening to my newly uploaded itunes right now, the kiddos are asleep, DH is on his way to a work meeting out of town, and I'm soon going to be in the shower and then sleeping soundly for at least 7 hours. We were at the camper this weekend and it was a nice time. We spent some time at the beach and I went tubing with my 2 kids and their cousin who is 10. We have a big 4 person tube and they just loved it, wanting to go faster and faster while I was wantin!g to go slower and slower! The weather was awesome. Sunny and warm and my tan is coming along nicely (yes I do wear sunscreen but still my skin just tans anyway!) This week we have t-ball and baseball on Mon and Wed and I am getting together with a friend and her 2 girls wed afternoon. I also am going to be spending time planning the wrestling float for the parade this sat. I kind of am in charge of that and I have never done anything like it ever in my life. Help me! We are just mainly trying to promote the wrestling club so we are doing flyers and candy. We have a trailer and an ATV to pull it but do not have any idea how to decorate it. I have balloons and crepe streamers in our colors and that is it. We are looking for the old banner to carry and my neighbor has a die cut machine to make big letters so we may make some cool signs to put on the float. I am trying to round up kids to hand out candy and be on the float. It really is going to be a lot of busy work this week. Hoping for a nice day saturday for the parade and carnival. Tooth fairy has to make an appearance tonight. B lost another baby tooth. She is out of cash so she had to find some gold dollar coins and make a coupon for a free book. She is also leaving a cute letter. J has yet to lose a tooth but B didn't lose any until 1st grade so she is sticking to that schedule I think. Anyway, I'm dead tired. Good night!

Time

2008-06-16T21:11:00.001-07:00

For the first time in a LONG time, I have TIME. Time to just sit back, relax, and enjoy my life. I have to admit I feel a little lost. I am ok with that and am learning to adjust to having nothing pressing to do. I also feel a little nervous to start working next month as that will just upset all this relaxing and simplicity I have going on. However, change is good and I'm sure we will thrive on the new working schedule. The kids already understand that I'm done with school and that I will start working soon. They know I'm working to help our family and so that we can do fun things like travel more and save up for things around the house and college. Ok, the college saving doesn't really excite the kids but I try to explain it all to them. I'm a little disappointed because my job starts the same week as vacation bible school. I always volunteer at VBS and won't be able to this year. I know I'm scheduled to work M-W, and not sure about Th and Fri. I hope to be able to be there for the friday sing along to wrap up the VBS week. My kids just love VBS, and I have always loved volunteering. I will really miss it. Hopefully next year I can take that week off (or if I'm still on evenings I will have mornings off anyway).

I'm home alone this week for a few days. I am up late as I usually am when I'm alone. I am always tired the next day but I have trouble sleeping at night when hubby is gone.

We found out last week that B needs glasses again. The ones he picked out are so cute. Jenna told him "Bret, you look really handsome with glasses" (when he was trying them on). He picked out some copper/red glasses that are a little "bold" but he is excited. I really really hope that all the kids think they are as cool as him. Is 3rd grade too young to think glasses aren't cool?

J had T-ball today, and she thinks she is really cool stuff. She has been waiting and waiting. I hope it is all she hoped it would be. It probably isn't as exciting as she was thinking but hopefully she will have fun. She really want to have real games like B, but this is more informal. I do think that they have a little game at the end and we will make a big deal about that for her. She really needs more of her own things. She just has not wanted to play sports like her brother until now. We tried dance and that totally flopped. She likes gymnastics and claims she is going to play basketball next year.

I'm off to bed!

RN

2008-06-10T06:16:00.000-07:00

I passed! I passed!! I PASSED!!!!!!!!
Now I can really start my summer vacation. Talk about relief!

NCLEX on the brain

2008-05-28T10:08:00.000-07:00

I am a studying maniac this week. I scheduled my NCLEX (date and time is a secret but I'll post once I pass!) and I am studying daily. I hate it. I have done over 1000 questions and am doing at least 200 every day. I have a schedule of what to do each day and I try to stay ahead. I do at least 2 hr a day off and on. It is so hard to do because hey, I am done with school. I am supposed to be relaxing and drinking margaritas and going for long walks and cleaning my house. Instead, every free minute is studying STILL!!! The kids have school today so I did do a little cleaning and the past 2 hours I have studied. I plan to go on a 3 mile jog/walk and then come home and shower. I may study some more tonight but this afternoon I'm taking off. B has a baseball game tonight and DH is heading out of town soon for a night. I am a single mom tonight. We will go to baseball and then maybe pick up fast food or something. I am up to jogging about 1.5 miles until I walk. Then I jog/walk the final 1.5 miles. So, I bet I jog almost 2 of those 3 miles. I don't ever remembering getting quite this far. I know, for many 2 miles is nothing but for a NON runner like myself it isn't too shabby. I did my 3 miles a little over 30 minutes yesterday.
I'm off to get some stuff done, and wish me luck!

The Power of Ten

2008-05-25T17:32:00.000-07:00

The Power of Ten
Ten Years Ago I was 24 years old and planning my wedding. I was recently engaged and planned a wedding in less than 6 months. I was so very young and optimistic. I was working in Iowa and interviewing for jobs back here at home. I started a new job in Aug of 1998 and we moved here.

Ten Months Ago It was mid summer and I was working as a nursing student intern. I was working 32 hr a week for the first time after being a stay at home mom for many years.

Ten Weeks Ago I was still in the midst of my last semester of school. I was going out to dinner with friends at a really expensive restaurant (so not worth it) and trying to just fit it all in.

Ten Days Ago I was walking 5 miles and both kids were in school. I was packing for a trip to Iowa.

Ten Hours Ago I was playing with my kids in the basement. We were trying to figure out my new WII Fit.

Ten Minutes Ago I was tickling J on the living room floor telling her how much I love her

Ten Minutes From Now I will be helping J get ready for bed. We are home alone, B and DH are at a wrestling party and we left early.

Ten Hours From Now I will hopefully be sleeping soundly in my cozy bed!

Ten Days From Now it will be a Wed and I will be studying for my boards, playing with J while B is in school, and going to B's baseball game in the evening.

Ten Weeks From Now I will be completing my first week of work. I will be very overwhelmed and exhausted but hopefully in a good way!

Ten Months From Now I will be feeling more comfortable in my job and hoepfully looking into some grad schools to start part time in the fall. I will hopefully love my job.

Ten Years From Now i will have a 18 and an almost 16 year old!!! I will have been a nurse for 10 years and will have found my dream job and area of nursing that I am meant for. I will have my masters in some area of nursing and have a great job that I love with flexibility to do things I love outside of work as well. I will spend lots of time with my hubby and hopefully travel often.

Part of me kind of hopes that I might even have a 3rd child by this time but time will tell on that one. If we do have a 3rd it will not be for another year (not trying until I have been working a year) so that I get established in my work and decide if it is in the cards. I would not go back to being a stay at home mom so it would have to feel right and work out that I can work and not use a lot of child care. It depends on many things: my job, DH job, finances, how we all handle me working etc. I am almost to the point of saying 100% I am done having kids. I love my 2 with all my heart and would be 100% content forever. I do not think I would ever regret not having a 3rd but part of me would love a 3rd. I think either way I'm ok. DH is very fine with the 2 we have and at this point is not ready for a 3rd. It would take a lot of discussion for him to agree to it. If I do have a 3rd, in 10 years he/she would probably be 7-8 yr old. Part of me can't fathom starting the whole baby thing over. Choices!!!!!!

secret date

2008-05-23T20:59:00.000-07:00

I have scheduled my NCLEX test and am keeping the date a secret. I got my authorization to test (ATT) number yesterday so I scheduled online today. Let's say I don't have a ton of time to prepare. I really want to get it over with and have it behind me so I can enjoy the part of my summer that I am not working or studying!

I am off to bed but a couple things from this week to jot down:

J's field trip today to the farm. Beautiful 70 degree weather and lots of fun things to see.
B's baseball game this Wed, he got 2 singles and did great. Says he likes baseball now!
We had a garage sale this week. I got rid of lots of stuff!!! YAY!
My WII Fit arrived and just tried it out today. My BMI is supposedly 21, and I am having fun getting to know my new little gadget. Hoping it will help me gain some strength and better posture/balance. The kids also had fun doing the balance games.
Looked at bearded dragons today. Thinking of getting one for a pet, the kids are really hoping for this!
Spring finally here. Sun has been out, and no longer wearing heavy jackets. Spring jackets still needed in the mornings and some days but much improvement in the weather.
Opened up the camper last weekend. Looking forward to spending lots of time there.
Our weekend is actually pretty open. Hoping to relax, study, read, and spend time together as a family without running all over.

Evening/Weekend Graduating Nursing Class of 2008

2008-05-18T16:53:00.001-07:00

I am now a "graduate nurse"!! I am in the 2nd row, 5th person over from the left (2nd over from the right). Pinning was great. I am glad I did it. I will miss some of the friends I have made but I know we will stay in touch. I was really happy my favorite instructor was there (she is on sabatical this year and not teaching) and she was able to pin me. It meant a lot to me to have someone who really taught me a lot and encouraged me to pin me. I will try to post a picture of my pin (I have 2 actually) later. One is the school nursing pin and one is designed by a classmate.

On a side note (because grades are not the most important thing!) I did end up getting an A by just a few points so I graduate from nursing school with a 4.0. I am proud of that, even though it doesn't really affect getting a job. It may help later if I want to get into a masters program. But, really it was just a goal I had for myself and I almost didn't make it. My grade was actually listed as a B and I emailed the instructor to check the calculations and there was an error. I had to get 92% to get an A and I got 92.95%!! Talk about cutting it close.

DONE! And misc.

2008-05-13T17:12:00.000-07:00

Yippee!!!!!

I am now a graduate nurse.

After 4 years of going to school every week I am done.

Pinning tomorrow night. I am going to relax the rest of the week. Then I will start NCLEX studying. I plan to do at least 100 questions a day until the test. That won't be too hard as I can do them here and there and after the kids are in bed do at least half of them each day. I can also do them while they are at school.

It still is not spring here. I wish for sun tomorrow.

I walked/jogged about 4-5 miles today. I have to see how far it was tomorrow in the car. It felt great. I actually jog now. I usually jog the first 1.5 miles then walk and then try to do some jogginb spurts the rest of the way. I still can't imagine going for 4 mile runs but maybe someday. I have been drinking lots of fluids (water and hot green and black tea) and feel like my body is getting cleansed. I feel great!

I also have tried to sign up for Blog Bots to get updates. I have not gotten any email updates yet, and have no idea why as the blogs I put in there have updated. When I changed my blog appearance I lost my blog list so I searched for them all and pasted the links in blogbots and still nothing. Not sure what I did wrong. Anyone know?

4 Hour Countdown

2008-05-12T12:02:00.000-07:00

At 6pm I will be starting my final nursing school test ever!! I am nervous, excited, scared, happy, and grateful all at once. It doesn't feel like it is really over, I really don't know when it will hit me. I just am going to feel so weird when I am done. In some ways I will feel empty, but I have to learn to feel full with the things in my life that I do have, my kids and my husband, my friends, my home. I have to re-arrange my life and I'm so excited to spend more time with all of my loved ones.

I also am going to spend more time with myself, taking care of myself. Exercising and pampering myself every so often. Enjoying the small things in life. I am so excited about that. I will do all the things I love to do that I had to put off. Scrapbooking, crafting, changing things in my home, re-arranging furniture and rooms, painting walls, cleaning, cooking, and anything else I can think of!!

Wish me luck tonight!

Surreal

2008-05-07T20:07:00.000-07:00

It really is crazy to me that in 4 days I will be done with nursing school. How is that possible. I have been working and working for this for almost 4 years. I have been in school for that long, studying, balancing, stressing, and hoping for it all to be over. Now it is. I can't believe it. I am not sure what I will feel like when it is done. It has been such a huge part of my life. I will no longer have to stay up late and study. I will no longer have to do care plans or write papers or do group projects or take notes and read them over and over. I will no longer have to drive to class every Mon and Wed night. I will not see the people that I have seen 2 or more times a week every week for 2 years anymore. Some parts will be sad. I met a wonderful friend in my very first class that I took towards being a nurse. It was sociology. We then had every single class together from then on. I have known her almost 4 years and I have talked with her every week for almost all of those. I have seen her at least 2 times a week. I now will not see her anymore (well hopefully some but not 2 times a week!) and that is sad. I also met so many other amazing people in nursing school. All types, all ages, everyone is so different yet we all were headed down the same path. We all wanted that RN behind our name. Some of us made it, and we lost some along the way. Some really great people did not make it through nursing school, and they had to put their dream on hold and try again next year. We may even lose more people come monday (our last test). I really hope everyone that has made it this far makes it all the way. They deserve it.

FIESTAWARE

2008-04-29T11:58:00.001-07:00

For some reason, lately I have been obsessed with Fiestaware dishes. I do not own any of these dishes but have always loved the idea of having various colors to mix and match and can picture them in my one set of glass doored cupboards. I can't bring myself to buy any, just because I don't need them. I packed up our old dishes that we never used and put them in the garage for the sale I am having next month. They were cheap, white, and boring. Plus, very heavy. We tend to use our plastic plates a lot, and that is so not right. I have my good china but don't want to use that as our everyday dinnerware. I also have an 8 place setting of 2 other sets of dishes but I really do not like either. One is a hand me down from my parents. They had it as newlyweds and I don't have the heart to get rid of it. It is dark brown and green. The other set is dollar store dishes, and they are actually kind fo nice. They are sturdy and kind of remind me of fiestaware. However, the only colors they had were an olive green and pumpkin orange. I was hoping for a mix of colors and my friend who told me about them had a nice burnt red color she had found but they were out. So, I have about 4 of each green and orange in plates, bowls, and mugs. They are "ok" but not my fiestaware. I am 34 yr old and have been married almost 10 years and I really want those dishes!!! I have gone to Kohl's a few times lately to look at the place settings. They are about $20 each and I'd want at least 4 settings to start out with so that is about $80. My plan is to have my garage sale in May and see how much I make and then use that money and wait for a good coupon to come (one time I got 30%!) and possibly make my purchase. I seem to be buying a lot of stuff lately, or wanting to change things. I don't know if it is because I am starting a new chapter in my life or that I know I'll be making money soon, or just that I'm getting bored with things that I have had for years. I just don't know. I really am not a big shopper or spender (even though it sounds like it a lot on this blog lately!) I never, ever go to malls. I pretty much buy everything we have either on sale or clearance. I do not buy name brand things for any of us. I buy almost everything at Target or Kohls. Does anyone out there have fiestaware? Tell me about it!! I've been searching online and the cheapest I've seen is $20 for a place setting of 4 or 5. I'd prefer the 4 piece but Kohls only has the 5. I don't think I need saucers. I also want a variety of colors and then add more as I can. I would even buy secondhand but ebay seems even more expensive. Until I actually buy it, I will just picture it in my cupboard and dream! HA!

Changes ahead

2008-04-20T09:38:00.000-07:00

I can't believe the end of April is just around the corner. I have my final exam May 12 and pinning May 14. Then I'm done with school. I will be trying to get an early June NCLEX date so I will spend the rest of May studying. I will then hopefully take the NCLEX first week of June and have a month off from everything until I start my job July 28. I am eager to transition from student to RN. I am so looking forward to a break from school. I do plan to go back for my masters in time, but not sure when I will do that. I may take classes here and there to take advantage of my tuition reimbursement and get some generals done for the masters program. I do want to work at least a year before doing any school. I need a break!! And working will be plenty to keep me busy!

I am starting my outside walking again, now that it is above freezing. It still is not "spring" around here. We still need to dress warm, but hopefully in the next couple weeks things will warm up. I am walking in the MS Walk again May 4, and we never know what the weather will be. It has varied from sunny and warm to snow and sleet. It is 8 miles so I need to do some regular walking until then to prepare my body so it isn't in pain that day!! I did 3 miles yesterday and typically do about 3 miles at least a few times a week.

The kids are done with school the first week in June. Then we will be busy doing fun summer stuff. Can't wait!

Snow Day

2008-04-11T08:03:00.000-07:00

The kids happened to have the day off school, due to parent/teacher conferences so we are all home. There is quite a bit of snow outside and there is more coming. I sure hope spring/summer comes quickly!! I just cleaned the hardwood floors, by hand this time (usually I use the swiffer mop). I have to put everything back then I'm not going to do too much housework. I already did all my laundry yesterday. The kids are playing nicely as of now. I think I'll help them make a fort in the basement. They would love that. Not much else going on today. Nice to have a day with no plans. Tomorrow B has 2 birthday parties back to back. I plan to take the kids to the yearly library used book sale. Most books are $1 or less. Usually they find some treasures and I love good deals on books. DH and I plan to have a night out tomorrow night for my birthday. My parents volunteered to babysit so we will think of something fun to do. There are a lot of movies out I'd like to see. Anyway, that is what is going on around here!!

I didn't think 5 1/2 year olds could still have tantrums?

2008-04-10T16:11:00.000-07:00

But guess what? They can!! J had a great big one today at Tar-jay. Not fun, and totally unexpected really. She used to have them often as a 2-3 yr old when she did not get what she wanted but she seems a bit old. Here is the story....

We had to get a few groceries and 2 birthday gifts for parties this weekend. While in the toys, of course the kids like to wander around and look at toys. J found this little baby Bratz thing in a bottle. It was like $4.99. I told her she could hold onto it and I'd see, as I really wasn't planning on buying them any toys and she is out of money. B also found these little Playmobile pirates. They are like $2.99. Not a big deal. But still, as we walked around I started thinking of all the toys they have at home that aren't played with. I started feeling guilty, like I should not give in to them just because they are inexpensive. I also was thinking of the week previous. J was home sick, really sick, with a bad double ear infection. She was so pathetic and sick, while at the pharmacy I totally caved and bought her this trick/magic set for like $6, it was such a waste of money if you saw what was in it. She played with it for one day. I also thought of the past few weeks. My husband bought them a little something a couple weeks back. They also got some stuff from their grandparents. They have all these toys they don't even truly know all they have. Pathetic really.

So, towards the end of the shopping I said "I am not punishing you, you both were very good. I just do not think you need these toys so we are not going to buy them today." B has his own money and I still did not let him just because he has some similar toys at home already that he does not play with. B was sad but ok. J started having this major meltdown for like the whole time we were checking out. She first would not give me the toy, then I started the 1-2-3 and by 3 she handed it over but still was freaking out. It was totally out of control. It is like she lost control of her emotions. This shows me that she is not told "no" enough, and she needs to learn disappointment a little better. I feel like I have messed up with her. She is our baby and we seem to cater to her in some ways. Even her brother hates to see her upset. He said "mom, get her the toy. you don't have to buy mine." Is that the saddest thing?? He hates her upset. Being upset is part of life and this was a lesson for the kids and for me. Say no!!

I have to say, we usually do not venture to the toy area for this reason. They always find something they just LOVE and it is the most amazing wonderful toy ever made. I typically shop alone or stay in just the grocery area. When we have to buy gifts is when we go to the toy area. I should not have to avoid the toy area, and next time I will make it very clear they won't be getting anything. I know it was probably confusing for them, as I told them they could hold onto the toys but I changed my mind about buying them. Is that wrong??? What do you think?

On another note, it is snowing. Like really snowing. Big, wet snowflakes. And it is APRIL!

34

2008-04-08T08:53:00.000-07:00

Today I am 34 years old. I don't know where the years have gone!! I still feel like I am 18 years old sometimes!! I am happy and content to be in my 30's and have so much to look forward to. I have the life I always dreamed of, or even more. I have a loving family, 2 beautiful and healthy kids, wonderful friends, a roof over my head, and my health. I have food to eat, clothes to wear and money to spend. I am a lucky woman.

I am spending my birthday kid-less (both at schools) and studying for a big exam tomorrow. Not the most exciting day but that is ok. I don't want or need much. I just am happy to be here! I came home from class last night to find a trail of computer printed letters down the hall and up the stairs saying: "HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOM. WE LOVE YOU!" What a nice surprise. That is all I need.

I have to admit I did do some shopping for myself this year. More than usual. The coats (see post below, they still have not arrived...), and I ordered myself this makeup kit:
http://www.everydayminerals.com/g?cartItem=1&productId=624&t=incompleteKit&cartId=
If you like mineral makeup, this company is great. They have really affordable makeup and great quality. I have tried drugstore brands and I either break out or don't like the color or how it wears throughout the day. Since starting to wear mineral makeup, my skin has cleared up a lot and I break out a lot less and when I do it is not as bad as it used to be when I used regular liquid foundation. I got my makeup yesterday and have been trying my new colors out. The stuff I got should last me a long time. The sizes are really generous and you get so much for your money.

My other gifts also include new blinds (ordered online also from http://www.selectblinds.com/, which DH is going to install for me. I am excited for the new look. And we put this on reserve at the local video game store: http://e3nin.nintendo.com/wii_fit.html. It is the new WII Fit game, coming out in May. I have read and heard really good things about it, and hope it is something I can incorporate into my workout. Plus, the whole family can have fun with it. So, I am spoiled this year.

J came in this AM and gave me a piece of her gum and a bottle of her nail polish. Orange nail polish! She is so sweet.

I better get back to studying. Here's to another great year.

JOB

2008-04-03T21:30:00.000-07:00

Today I finally got a call for the job offer I've been waiting for since monday. I know, it was only 3 days but to wait for that call is hard!! I was fairly sure I would get the job but not positive. I did my preceptorship in this unit, but not a lot of experience in this area. Luckily they are in need of RN's and I was lucky enough to get an interview. It is in an emergency department, at a fairly busy hospital. It is in my hometown about 25 min away. It is a great unit, the people are really supportive and helpful. I am nervous as heck to start but that is not until July. I have 2 options for shifts:

1. Evenings 56 hr/pay period (2 weeks) so approx. 28 hr/week. 3pm-1130pm. Every other weekend.

2. Day/night 72 hr/pay period so about 36 hr/week (more than I wanted). 7am-7pm or 7pm-7am. Every 3rd weekend. 12 hr shifts are SO long!

My ideal job would be 8 hr shifts day/evening rotation every 3rd weekend. I would like to work about 28-32 hr a week. But as a new grad I can't be picky and was given these options. Things change quickly and new shifts will open up after I've been there a while and being internal I can get first dibs on those new openings.

I did not initially want an evening shift, due to missing kid stuff. However, I'm leaning that way just because the hours are less and I think I would handle it better physically and emotionally. I am not sure I'm ready to work 36 hr/week, 12 hr shifts, plus nights for some of them. That is a lot to take on. I can always pick up shifts if I want more money. The downside is that during the week I will not see the kids those days. However, it is only a couple days a week and I do that now with school in the evenings. I don't think I'd seem them much more working the 12 hr shifts due to it taking up the entire day. Hard call. The one thing I hate to pass up is the every 3rd weekend. That would be nice to have more weekends off. But that weekend I work would be basically total work. If I do evenings I have mornings at home on those weekend days.

Anyway, I feel lucky to have an offer. Many people are having trouble getting interviews. You know that nursing shortage, not really around here. I'm sure it will eventually be that way but it isn't right now. There are many new grads and hospitals can be picky. There are jobs but many just want you to have some experience. So, I really can't be picky about it. I have to get my foot in the door somewhere. I loved working emergency dept and I will see and do so much.

I'm still up and it is nearly midnight. I am so tired. J had a tough day. She had a fever of 101 and had to take antibiotics orally and drops in her ears. She also is taking tylenol when I can get her to. She did not eat much and was very tired and cranky all day. I eventually picked her up late afternoon and sat in the rocker recliner with her, holding her like I did when she was a baby. Within 5 minutes she was out, and slept nearly 3 hours. I held her almost half of that time and loved it. She is so long and big now but still just my baby.

I'm off to bed. I did some homework and prepared for our simulation weekend this saturday at school. I also have computer training for the new charting system at the hospital so I can make up my OB day that I missed due to being sick earlier this month. I have lots to do for school still, but am trying to take it one day at a time.

So frustrated

2008-04-02T21:39:00.000-07:00

4:30 - leave house to bring kids to grandma's so I can go to class
5:30-8:00 - at class
8:15 - get a call from grandma telling me J says her ear hurts
8:30 - pick up kids and try to get out of there quick to make it to urgent care
9:10 - get to urgent care near home to find out they close at 9:00
9:15 - try another urgent care in town - closed, decide to drive to neighboring town 20 minutes away, not even sure if urgent care will be open but J crying uncontrollably, have to do something
9:40 - reach urgent care, it is open until 10!
10:00 - leave urgent care with 2 prescriptions. Double ear infection
10:05 - reach pharmacy, closed at 10:00 pm
10:20 - back in home town, hoping one of the 3 pharmacies are open
10:45 - have tried all 3, none are open. Tylenol from urgent care working a bit, J feeling better, falls asleep
10:50 - decide to go home and get through the night on tylenol/ibuprofen and get prescription in AM. All that work to find an urgent care and no medicine to take home. Could have waited until AM and see dr in town by appt. Very frustrated
11:00 - get kids in bed. Very tired kids and mom. No husband in town to help out
11:30 - about to go to bed. J wakes up crying in pain
11:45 - looking online for 24 hr pharmacy. About to get both kids in truck to get the meds
11:50 - J falls asleep again. I crawl in bed with her.
12:00 am - J wakes again moaning. I ask her if she wants to get the medicine but she does not want to get up. Give another dose motrin and hope for the best
12:15 - J asleep again. I'm wide awake yet exhausted.
12:30 - I decide to sleep in J's bed (it's a double thankfully). I eventually fall asleep.
Wake a few times at night. No terrible crying, but some uncomfortable moaning. Poor baby.
7 am - J is up and her ears hurt. I give another dose Motrin
7:30 am - both kids up watching cartoons. I'm exhausted and can't seem to get up.
8:00 am - I finally drag myself out of bed and shower. Call school absence line for J, make breakfast for B, make B's lunch
8:30 - J throws up the motrin all over her pants (luckily in the kitchen, not on carpet!)
8:45 - leave to drop B off at school.
9:00 - get to pharmacy down the street. Get prescriptions filled. J says she is feeling better (motrin that stayed in???)
9:15 - go to McD to get some DVD's for the day at home
9:30 - arrive home, have J eat a little something before giving antibiotics and ear drops
9:45 - put in DVD and make J a bed on living room floor.
10:00 - get out my homework that I am going to attempt to do during the day off and on, probably not with much luck.
11:00 - J watching movie, looking tired
I'm hoping for a nap today and really hoping we all sleep more tonight!!! The joys of motherhood! And why do these things happen at the worst time when DH is out of town?? I was just so frustrated! At least it is just an ear infection. Could be worse!

Praying

2008-04-02T10:10:00.001-07:00

Praying this is it!! This is the 2nd call that this family has gotten in the past week for a lung transplant. The first call ended up being a dry run (the lungs were not good) and they had their hopes up with no results. I am praying so hard that this time is the real deal.

http://cfhusband.blogspot.com/

This story is a true testament to organ donation. It is such a gift to give someone. I have been an organ donor since getting my first license and have made my wishes known to my husband and family. I would love for many others to have the gift of life once I am gone. I truly think it is such a wonderful gift and way to keep a spirit alive. If you aren't an organ donor, please read this story (even if you are, read it!) and consider it!

Pray for Tricia!!!

ordering for next year

2008-04-01T20:49:00.000-07:00

I decided today to search online for a winter coat for myself for next year. Since we have winter here from about October until April, I really wear my winter coats a LOT! I have had the same boring black one for about 7 years or more. I can remember buying it when I used to work downtown. It is really plain and boring, and just old. I also have a white coat (what was I thinking) that I wear often but it is white and I do wear makeup which seems to get on the collar. It isn't my favorite thing to wear and if I remember right I spent about $10 on it!! So, I searched and found the website overstock.com and ended up ordering 2 coats for what I feel is a pretty good deal. Hopefully I will be able to use them a lot in the winters to come!

I got this one in red:
http://www.overstock.com/Clothing/Jou-Jou-Detachable-Faux-Fur-Trim-Hooded-Jacket/2929412/product.html

I also found this one and really liked it so I splurged:
http://www.overstock.com/Clothing/Marcelle-Renee-Belted-Womens-Wool-Coat/2929420/product.html

I really probably do not need 2 coats but I promise I won't buy any for many years!!! Let's hope they are warm. MN winters call for warm coats.

I really want to find a coat for B for next year, along with winter boots. I missed all the clearance sales at the stores. He really needs some good winter boots that are able to dry out by the next day. I'd prefer ones with a liner that is removable and can be dried. I searched a bit online with no success. He will need a new coat next year also. I found one for J but missed the boys coats I guess. And the snowpants always go quickly and I missed out on those for both kids. Bummer. I may find something at some garage sales this summer. I will keep my eyes open. Last year I found some snowpants for J which she used all winter. Luckily, they can usually wear the same coats for about 2 years before needing a new one. I am trying to talk J into wearing some hand me down coats from B, even though they are quite "boyish". They are nice and warm though!!

One thing I used a ton this year are some boots I got for myself at Targ*t. They are suede and fur lined and only $20. They were put to good use on those cold snowy days. In fact, I wore them today!! Ugg's are a big thing here but not in my price range!!

So, as spring approaches I prepare for the cold of next winter. Let's hope for a nice warm summer in the meantime, even if we only get a couple months of warmth!

Alone

2008-04-01T20:13:00.000-07:00

After unexpectedly getting called out of town for work, my husband is gone. I am alone for the first time in many months. I have been spoiled lately, with him working from home. It used to be common for him to be gone for 5 days at a time a couple of times a month. I was used to being alone at night, doing all the childcare and housework. But lately I have been used to having him here. Knowing he will be with me at night, and I will sleep soundly with him by my side. I feel like it is so very quiet and lonely tonight. I don't want to go to bed because it will be cold and quiet. Too quiet. I dread the nights the most.

I can hear J snoring. Poor girl has a really stuffy nose. Her breathing is loud and labored. I will go adjust her pillow to try to get her nose to clear a bit. I know how she feels, as I am getting over a bad cold myself. B is wrapped up in his big blanket. I call him red riding hood, he loves to wrap his whole head in his comforter and sleep with just a little breathing hole. I always go in before I go to bed and unwrap his head, to find him all wet with sweat. His long hair sticking to his head all warm and flushed with heat. My boy is such a sweet thing. And J is usually drooling on her pillow. She is not a sound sleeper like her brother. When I check on her, she will sometimes talk to me. I whisper I love you to each kid and B never responds except for a change of position and mumble. J will occasionally whisper back to me that she loves me too. She sometimes has whole conversations with me with her eyes closed.

Back to school - good bye spring (snow) break

2008-03-31T21:17:00.000-07:00

It is April tomorrow and we are getting a snow storm. Nice. The roads are slushy and slippery. The snow fell ALL day, it was that wet heavy snow. I am so sick of winter.

I am off to bed but wanted to share something:

I was dropping B off this morning at school. He woke up unhappy about his return to the classroom and all that "work" he has to do all day. I got out to let him out, and give him a quick hug (he still lets me hug him, at age 8, so I'm taking advantage).

Me: have a great day, see you later!
B: giving me a weird look and smile, being kind of bashful
Me: what??? What's wrong?
B: I am just going to miss you (quietly)
Me: I'm going to miss you to, but I'll see you later. Have a good day and I love you!
He then walked up to school, waving at me the entire walk up the sidewalk. So cute, he actually does miss me sometimes!!!

spring break come and gone

2008-03-30T16:26:00.000-07:00

The kids head back to school this week. They are ready! J does not have school until Tuesday (every other day) but they are getting kind of bored around here. The weather warmed up just slightly today so they were outside although it is muddy and still snow/ice on the ground. J attempted the 2 wheeler and can go quite a few feet before tipping over. She will get it soon though. B played with some friends in the neighborhood and we all worked on cleaning sticks and leaves from the grass that was actually showing. I vacuumed out the car and truck and washed both car seats. I even took off the fabric covers and machine washed them. They are air drying now. Spring cleaning I guess! I also ordered new blinds today for the whole first floor and basement. So excited for those to come. They are faux wood, but will look so much better than the cheapo ones I have now (that came with the house that is almost 10 yr old!). I checked and re-checked my measurements pray they will fit just right. Should be here in a week or 2. I have been cleaning out all the rooms, and our closet is back in order. I have been bagging up stuff for a garage sale and it is so nice to get rid of stuff we don't use. I bagged up a ton of kids books after hanging onto them too long. The baby books and board books. My kids are not into those and I was holding onto them more for the memories than for them to actually use. I did, of course, keep the ones I truly love. And we will have quite a collection of books to use for the future grandchildren!

I have an exciting event tomorrow that I am not going to talk about just yet, but it could be a big thing for me and our family. I am so hoping it all goes well. I will write more about it when I know more. It isn't a pregnancy or anything, but something that affects our future.

Not much else is too exciting. I have school 2 nights this week as well as Saturday. Then I am getting so close to being done. I have a big test coming up and another big teaching project. I also have the HESI exit exam to see if I'm ready for the NCLEX. We are planning our pinning ceremony and I ordered my nursing pin. It is all so real, I will actually finish this program!

Kid are doing well, I will write a post about them later this week!

bad mommy morning

2008-03-14T08:06:00.000-07:00

I just had one of those mornings when I was just feeling crabby and could not get everything ready, we were running late, it is picture day so I had to bathe them before school, forgot to pack snacks and had to go back in, just everything was going wrong. And then I get crabby with the kids and now I feel guilty. Oh well, I am human right? I still feel bad. I want them to have a cheerful and happy mom but I just can't do that 24/7. J woke up at 4am with a bad dream and came into our bed. I was kicked all night and slept terrible from that point on. She has been having bad dreams which is new to me as B never does (or doesn't wake up from them). She gets to sad that it is hard to tell her to go back to bed.

I am on spring break for a week. I have lots to do but no class. I have less than 2 months left. This weekend we are getting a sitter and going out with friends, adults only!! And Sun is my purse party open house. Hopefully I'll get lots of people over so it is worth the work for me and the person selling the purses (my friend's mother in law). I have to serve snacks and drinks and clean up the first floor at least. I am not too worried.

I am off to exercise, shower, and maybe use a gift card and go shopping. Try to have a fun day despite the bad start!

For Tricia

2008-03-10T18:25:00.000-07:00

http://cfhusband.blogspot.com/
I've been following the above blog for a month or 2 now. What an amazing story, amazing family, it just humbles me. Take a look if you have the time, or even if you don't.

This is a list "for Tricia" - all the things she will one day experience with her baby girl born at 24 weeks. As a mom of 2, I have lots to add! :)

Watching as your baby girl begins to crawl, then walk, to explore the world
Teething, lots of drool, crabby baby, sleepless nights, Tylenol
Ear infections, when she wakes up screaming at night and won't stop
First foods, huge messes on the high chair. I can especially remember pink yogurt and chocolate pudding being particularly messy.
Naked baby running through the sprinkler
First time with a babysitter, being so nervous and finding out she didn't even miss you very much
First words, learning to count, the first "I love you"
Arms up high wanting only momma to pick her up
Rocking a sick baby to sleep and not wanting to put her down
First day of school, heart aching but smiling at the same time
When she only wants to wear the same shirt, day after day, it is her favorite after all
Toddler independence, only wanting to do things "by herself" no matter how difficult
Pierced ears, nail polish, glitter, stickers, bows, make up, lip gloss, all things girl
And many, many, many other amazing things to look forward to.

Why did I have to open my big mouth?

2008-03-09T21:02:00.001-07:00

If you look at my last post you will know what I am talking about. I had to just go on about the 4 lb right?? Well, after that the stomach virus went through our house and I got hit. I ended up losing those 4 lb, and not in a way that I wish to re-live! I would rather have the 4 lb than to be sick any day. Oh well, I am recovered and lived to tell about it. I am so extremely tired right now but wanted to quick post. We spent the weekend at the state wrestling tournament, and B took 7th (out of 40 in his weight class) so I think he did great, he is upset that he did not get a medal (only 1st - 6th get medals) and my husband is sad also because B has had a great year and did so much better than last year and we both were hoping so much for him that he could place and get on the podium and get a medal. We know how disappointed he is. As much as I know that he did great, that he is so improved and works so hard, he just doesn't correlate that to anything. He only sees the black and white. But life is full of disappointments and he is a kid and will get over it as soon as he starts thinking of something else. We stayed in a hotel and the kids had a blast with their friends. I did not sleep at all. The night before we left DH had the sickness and was up all night so I went to sleep on the couch thinking I'd sleep better but I still heard him every time and was up pretty much all night. The couch is NOT comfortable I have to say. So, I then did not sleep well either night in the hotel. I was afraid the kids would fall off the bed or wake up sick or ???? I just was too anxious also about the tournament. I never sleep well in hotels. So, we just returned tonight and instead of going to bed nice and early with everyone else I had to finish up a group presentation that I agreed to do this weekend (my part of it was to put it all together in a powerpoint). So, I just got that done and have to get to sleep before I fall over. The kids both have school and I am not going to be a happy camper come tomorrow morning. We also had the time change so that messes me up also. I sound like a big complainer, guess I'm just tired. I did have a fun weekend and things are really going fine. I have my big presentation Wed then we have spring break next week. I am half way done with my FINAL semester. I don't know what I will do when I'm done with this!!! It will be so weird to not have the work to do all the time. I'll have regular work but not school work.

Not much else to write about. I'm off to bed!

4 pounds

2008-02-26T07:48:00.000-08:00

After holding my weight at a GREAT place for almost 6 months, I am up about 4 lb. I actually have been up about 3-4 lb since the holidays. So, it isn't like I'm slowly continuing upward but it could happen if I don't do something. I really want to get back to that nice weight I was at a few months ago. I know the gain is due to many things: holiday eating, travel to MI for almost a week of eating out, lack of time to plan/cook so eating too many unhealthy options, and finally skipping meals when I go to school or work and then getting way overhungry and then eating junk. Example, last night I had school so I had a late lunch and no dinner. By the time I got home at 8:30 I was way hungry. I started out with a nice healthy low fat tortilla with cheese and hot peppers. Small, lots of fiber, and would have been good to stop there. But I was still hungry so I decided to have a few tortilla chips. I should know better. I love chips. Had WAY too many. Then I wanted a small piece of chocolate. Which turned into 3 pieces. And ended up with me way too full and going to bed feeling yucky. When I was losing weight, I never ever ate after 6pm. I really need to start that again. I feel so much better going to bed a little hungry and having a big (healthy) breakfast of eggs or oatmeal or cereal/english muffin. I do still exercise but probably not as much as I did. Soon it will be warm enough to walk outside and I will get more activity in. I just have to catch this before I am up 10 lb and REALLY mad at myself.

Oh my gosh

2008-02-20T20:53:00.000-08:00

I am starting to feel my heart beat a little faster due to an overwhelming feeling of doom that I have so much to do the next few weeks. The homework is piling on, as it always does about a month into the semester. I always get through it, but still it just is this long list of things to do that seems so long and never just goes away. I have clinical this weekend. My 2nd to last one, yippee!! However, I have an instructor that I have not had before and though I have heard she is really good I have also heard that you MUST. KNOW. YOUR. MEDS or she may send you home. This means 2 patients who could be on like 10 meds or more each. So, I'm a little nervous about that as pharmacology isn't my strong suit, and I basically hate memorizing medication info that I will forget in a day or 2. It's one of those things that you need to memorize it but you won't really learn it unless it is a med you give routinely. So, I have that to look forward to in the wee morning hours of Friday/Saturday. I have to be at the hospital by 6:30 AM Sat AND Sun. Not looking forward to that AT ALL. But I know that each day I go in, I am that much closer to being done. After this weekend I will only have my OB rotation left and I heard that one isn't too bad at all. I also have this ridiculous group project looming over me, along with a 10 page paper, test coming up the first week in march (did I mention I got a B on the first test, yes a B, and I'm not happy about it). So, I really need to study a lot for that.

Tomorrow both kids have school and I COULD get a lot done for school. However, my mommy guilt for having to be gone all weekend will probably have me at their school most of the day. I volunteer in B's room Thur mornings 9:30-10:30 and J's room 10:30-??? whenever I can get out of there. I am debating going to lunch also but that means B at 11:40 and J at 12:40, which is a lot of waiting around to sit in a lunchroom with my kids who are usually to busy socializing with the other kids than to talk to me. But they claim to really want me to eat lunch with them so my presence must be all they need to feel loved!

Today J and I cleaned out some rooms and got rid of a few bags of clothes, toys, and kids stuff that they have outgrown. I am trying to whittle down and get rid of things they no longer play with. I was surprised how many puzzles we had that just are way too easy for a 5 1/2 and 8 year old. I would like to get rid of many books but that is hard for me to do. We love our books. I now have to decide if a garage sale is worth it or if I just donate it and take the easy way out. Whenever I've had a garage sale I never make any money, no one comes, and it rains. All that work for a measly $50 isn't really worth it.

The weather is absolutely frigid. It was -11 today. The kids don't get to even play outside at recess it is that cold. It is getting a little old. We have had a really cold winter it seems, maybe I've forgotten past years but it seems to be worse this year. I really wonder why I live here sometimes!! I am totally not a cold weather kind of person!!

I am going up to kiss my kiddos and snuggle with my hubby before my crazy weekend begins in 2 days. Wish me luck.

Hello!

2008-02-11T10:29:00.001-08:00

I just hate going to blogs and seeing the same post over and over at the top. I am one of those blogs!! Oh well, that is ok. I do my best. Things are going well. I did a rotation in pediatrics this past weekend. It was fun, but probably not what I want to do. It is pretty slow paced and the parents do much of the care for the kids. I had a 7 month old with RSV and a 5 yr old with kidney problems. A couple of students got to work in the peds ICU and that sounded pretty cool. Sad, obviously, but interesting.

Tonight and Wed I have class, then the weekend off. We are actually taking a weekend off from wrestling and going to IA to see family. We still haven't celebrated Xmas with them, so we will do that and visit everyone. Long drive but worth it.

The kids have all their valentines ready for school Thursday. I will get to volunteer at J's party for an hour then I have to go to the hospital for my last preceptorship day in the ER. I will miss working there and maybe I'll get a job there someday! I still do not have my applications out. I am waiting for 1 thing from my last semester clinical instructor. She said she would fill out a reference form and write me a letter of recommendation but she still has not sent them back to me. I hate to bug her via email about it, but I really need to get them sent out. If she is too busy I will just ask another instructor to do it. I basically have everything else ready. I need to start preparing for interviews (assuming I get 1 or 2) and just wait to see if anyone calls.

It is another freezing cold day. I think it is -4 degrees right now. It is crazy. What was really fun was getting up and leaving the house by 5:30am on Sun when it was about -20 degrees. Living in MN sure has it's negatives. When it is this cold you really can't go out at all. We go where we need to go, but nowhere that isn't absolutely necessary. Makes for a long day sometimes. I like to be able to go out and about more, but it just isn't any fun to be out at all. Plus, you have to warm up the car for 30 min for it to be even warm. I also have to pick up kids every day because it is too cold for them to walk home.

Besides being extremely tired (up at 5am Sat and Sun, work all day) things are going well. I spent some time with friends a while back and that was fun. I took J to Hannah Montana movie (why on earth is it $15??? Like she needs the money....) and it was ok. I am getting ready for B's movie birthday party a week from today. We are going to see The Spiderwick Chronicles. It isn't here so I don't have much to do (yay!) His real birthday was busy with school, wrestling practice, and small family celebration here. He seemed happy with everything though. I made his favorite dessert instead of cake (he isn't a big cake fan). It was a big chocolate chip cookie warm from the oven with vanilla ice cream, chocolate sauce, whipped cream and a cherry on top. He gobbled that up and we all go to enjoy some as well. He got 2 more Webkinz (up to 5 now!), a big book about his video game Zelda, a new Wii game, a puzzle, and some other Chapter books. He is into these books called "The Diary of a Wimpy Kid" and they are hilarious. I like to read them! I am trying to get him to read more on his own. He would rather I read to him, even though he is a great reader. It isn't like I don't enjoy reading to him but by this age I was reading big chapter books on my own and I think he should read some books on his own just for enjoyment.

I am off to finish laundry and put away lunch mess. Until next time.....

8 years old

2008-02-06T19:53:00.000-08:00

My big boy is going to be 8 tomorrow. At 7:17 am he was born after I was in labor all night long. I went into the hospital around this time 8 years ago. I remember Brian and I had a big steak dinner at my parents house and I was having mild contractions that continued to increase in frequency and intensity throughout the evening. I was really nervous about labor and the pain and the unknown. I had a great birth and no complications. I can still remember it all very clearly. I remember exactly what he looked like when he came out and the midwife put him on my chest. He just stared up at us with big eyes and we fell in love. Happy Birthday to my first baby!!!

It will grow back

2008-02-04T08:51:00.000-08:00

It's only hair but for some reason I get attached to hair. My hair and especially the kids hair. Even B who is a boy! He has his hair kind of long-ish. It grew quite long and a few weeks ago DH took him in for a supposed "trim". Well, I was shocked how much he let them cut off and a little upset about it. I loved the long hair. It looked SO cute. Anyway, I got over it and it is only hair. Well, now J has it in her head that she wants a haircut. She has had only trims her entire 5 1/2 years of life. Her hair is about down to her waist. It is a light brown with waves and I love her hair. She gets compliments on it all the time and she has always liked her long hair. Well, last night she told me she wants to cut it to her shoulders!!! That would be about a foot of length cut off. She seems to be confident she wants to do this. However, I'm not confident at all. I feel anxious about HAIR! I think a lot of it comes from my own childhood. My mom always cut my hair and lets say she wasn't exactly a beautician. I always had wavy/curly hair and she would cut bangs and they would always end up super short and crooked looking. And I never had really long hair and always wanted it. Now my daughter has the hair I always wanted as a kid and she doesn't want it, so I know I can't make her keep it for me, but what would you do???? She is saying she wants to do it today after school. I will be so sad to see that hair go if I do it!!! But she should have a choice right??? What if she regrets it??? It is only hair.....

still here

2008-01-19T19:38:00.000-08:00

wow, I sure have not written much lately. I am back at school, busy as ever. I am doing my preceptorship in the ER, and LOVE it. So much that I hope to get a job at this hospital. It is about 20-25 min away and is actually the hospital I was born in. I love the staff and love the job. We'll see. I am open to any opportunity that comes my way. I am working on my resume and applications. Hope to get them sent out really soon. School has not been too awful yet. We have a lot to do coming up but it is not terrible. Every weekend we are at wrestling. I'm going to be a little relieved when it is over. It is fun, and we all love it, but it is draining at times. B has had strep and a stomach thing in the past couple weeks so we had to miss some. J finished up her antibiotics for her ear infection, and I'm thinking that may have helped her miss the strep her brother had. The kids' Webkinz are finally working and they love them. They love the computer part of it as well as the actual animals. I think the computer graphics of their animals make them seem more "real" to them. Whoever thought up these things is probably making the big bucks. They cost enough that is for sure. B will probably get one for his birthday next month, but I am not going to be buying them on a regular basis. Both kids used some Xmas money to buy one more so J has a pug dog (Tommy) and a white seal (Snowball). B has a tree frog (goldy) and bull frog (leaper). The kids were looking at a picture of DH and I back in 1998 in Las Vegas and laughing at how dorky we looked. Hard to believe how much has changed since 1998. Anyway, I need to get one more kid to bed and not much exciting is happening around here. I will try to update if and when something exciting does happen!!

Thursday, the last day.....

2008-01-10T10:44:00.000-08:00

.....before school starts tomorrow at 8am. I have dreaded this day and hoped for this day to come over the past month. The sooner I start, the sooner I will be done. I have been working for this degree for about 4 years. I think I started taking my classes that I needed to get into nursing school around the time Jenna was 1 or 1 1/2. Then, it seemed like such a huge task, something that was just a little dream that was so far away. Now, I sit 4 months from being DONE with actual nursing school. In 5 months I will have my RN license (assuming I pass the NCLEX). I will be a working nursing in 5-7 months depending on when I start working. Wow. I can't believe I followed the dream all the way to the end. I am almost to the end of one road, and starting on my way down another. But back to reality, I have to finish 4 months of gruling studying, classes, clinical, papers, staying up late etc etc. But I have done it 3 other semesters and I can do it one more.

I am alone in the house, and must leave to get Jenna from her playdate. The kids are keeping me very busy. Wrestling almost takes over our lives this time of year. Bret is doing wonderful and loves his wrestling team. He is 55 pounds this year, he gained about 5 lb since last year. He has only lost 2 matches so far. He is such a hard worker. He works so hard at practice and during his matches. I am so proud of him. He has such determination, more than I have ever had. Jenna is busy with school and her social life. Both kids are just the joy of my life and I love watching them as they grow and change into these little people. So unlike me in many ways but like me in others. Amazing.

ER and end of break coming soon.

2008-01-06T16:22:00.000-08:00

You know how I said I got a preceptorship in a cardiac ICU? Well, a couple weeks ago I got an email from the instructor asking if I would like a ER/ED preceptorship instead. That was actually my first choice as I really want to know if I like emergency/trauma nursing. So, I am nervous but exciting to do my 48 hr in an ER. I will see and do a LOT!

I start back up to school Jan 11. I am hoping the semester will go fast. I am starting to print out my application materials. I am sending in my request for transcripts, getting my references lined up, and my resume finished. I am on my way.

Our vacation to Michigan was great. My new nephew is just as cute as can be. We miss him and my brother and sister in law already.

I got the Christmas decorations down this past week. I also did my post Christmas shopping to get stuff fore next year. Wrapping paper, gift tags, ornaments, lights etc. I bought some lights for outside and am going to make my hubby put them up next year. I also bought a 6' artificial tree to put up in the basement. We have a really big basement/playroom that we spend a lot of time in so I may do a traditional/white light more formal tree upstairs and a more homey/kids tree downstairs. I will use the colored lights and all the kid ornaments down there. I look forward to it already!

The kids are doing great. J has a mild ear infection so she is on amoxicilllin for that. She is busy playing with all her fun toys and adjusted to going back to school just fine. B was hoping not to go back to school. He told me "I just want to have peace at my home, and not get bossed around all day at school!" But he admitted that it is ok. He is having a great year in wrestling, but it seems to take up all our weekend time. He enjoys the tournaments, spending time with all the teammates. He is such a dedicated kid for only 7 yr old. I signed J up for gymnastics starting in Feb, and B up for 4 weeks of tennis lessons in April. Something different and hopefully fun. The cheerleading camp J liked before is not $48 for 2 /2 hr saturdays. I am not going to pay that much for 4 hr of cheerleading. The tennis lessons are 4 weeks and only $20.

Anyway, I better get kids fed, bathed, read to, and to bed. They both have school tomorrow.
Goodnight!

I hate Webkinz

2008-01-01T18:31:00.000-08:00

I got both J and B Webkinz for Xmas. J is totally able to get on and play and poor B just gets logged out every time. There is no customer support help at all. I feel so bad. I don't know what to do. He wants to play so bad!!! We are able to login but when we try to go into the room, it gives us a message and logs him out. So frustrating. I am just sick of it!!

Christmas 2007 in a nutshell

2007-12-26T10:09:00.000-08:00

Christmas was a happy, wonderful, fun filled day. We started the festivities the eve before at my parents for a yummy steak dinner, kids playing, and present opening. We were home by 8:30 and opened our family presents under the glowing lights of our own tree. The kids were tucked into their cozy beds with thoughts of Santa visiting over the night. I then got busy bringing "santa" presents up to the tree, organizing them to look pretty. I also got the stockings stuffed and the letter written and left in the hall for the kids to see upon waking in the morning. We were woken up at 7am by J and made her come into bed with us after peaking downstairs and reading the letter. She patiently waited for B to wake up around 7:30. We then proceeded to go downstairs and wait for daddy to make it down. In the meantime I took some pics and video. The kids were so excited for their gifts and each had 5 to open that morning. Both are now busy playing with new toys. I had a nice turkey dinner on Xmas day for my parents and grandma. We played some games (new kids games) and had a nice time. We are all now looking forward to our trip to see my brother's family. We have a few new DVD's, CD's and games for the car. B got his Nintendo DS and J got a Leapster, which is a bigger hit than I thought it would be. I got DH some new CD's for the trip and we can't wait to meet our new nephew/cousin!

We have many happy memories from this year!!

p.s. does anyone have Webkinz??? Is the site usually accessible? Is it busy now just because of xmas? It keeps kicking us out so the kids have not been able to play on the site. They were really looking forward to it, as they hear about them all the time from their friends.

Christmas Vacation

2007-12-19T13:32:00.000-08:00

I am officially on break, and I have been busy getting ready for the holidays. Last night the kids and I made cinnamon applesauce ornaments. They were really into it, and we now have at least 15 new ornaments for the tree. I am trying to talk them into giving a few away but they hate to part with their precious ornaments!! I'd have to say it was fairly easy, although I am never a big fan of rolling dough a million times. And I had to use more applesauce than required of the recipe to even make it dough like. It smelled great while they were baking though!! Right now I am mid-cookie making. I mixed up 3 different doughs and started baking. The sugar cookies are waiting until the kids can use the cookie cutters to make their own. They just love those cookie cutter projects!! They should be home any minute so I gotta run.

P.S. I got an A this semester!

last test

2007-12-17T07:42:00.000-08:00

I have my final test tonight, and then I have a few weeks off. By 8pm I will be done with my 3rd semester of nursing school. Hard to believe. Next semester will bring many new challenges. I will have a preceptorship in cardiac ICU for 3 weeks. I will be doing rotations in pediatrics, L&D, postpartum/OB, and general med/surg. This will be my first semester working with kids, babies, and pregnany moms. It is kind of weird because this is why I went to nursing school. I still do not know what area I want to work in, but this next semester will be a good indicator if I do really want to work with kids, babies, or moms/pregnancy. I doubt I will start out in those areas #1 because they are specialty areas and hard for new grads to get into #2 I would like to get a broad base first before specializing #3 I have no idea what I want to do!! I have liked so many areas that it is really hard for me to chose where I really want to work!! It is going to be really hard to fill out applications with so many choices. I am leaning towards float, ER, or cardiac. All would give me great experience. And I may have to take what I can get, with hours that work for my family.
Anyway, I have to study. I really do. I am so excited to be done soon!

donuts with dad

2007-12-11T13:29:00.000-08:00

Today the kids had "donuts with dad" at their school. It was at 8am, which is early for us to be up and ready by. Thank goodness we don't live in the neighboring town that starts elementary school at 7am!! Yikes!

Anyway, today was the first time in a while that both kids were in school and I didn't have any obligations. I usually have some type of appointment or have to work at the school. So, instead of doing anything fun I did laundry and studied for my final on monday. I think I'm in pretty good standing to get an A, but I want to study enough to make sure I can get that A!! Then after grades come out I can start applying for jobs already. The new grad programs hire early around here. So, I will be busy over my winter break doing job applications.

The kids will be home soon so I gotta run. Happy Tuesday!

for the whole (well the small amount of people who really read this blog) world to see.....

2007-12-07T18:44:00.000-08:00

I am putting it all out there, these are some before and after pics of me from Aug 2007 to Nov 2007. I was thinking that I don't "feel" like I am any different. I don't feel thinner, but looking back at the Aug picture, I am. Since thanksgiving I haven't been eating the greatest so I'm hoping that posting these today will give me some willpower to get through the holidays without any weight gain. I really like the after pictures much better!!! It is obvious that I gain weight right around my middle. Not only is this unattractive, but it is really unhealthy. Studies show that people who gain "belly" weight are more likely to suffer a heart attack or other heart condition. I am not a person who gains weight in my legs or arms, just around the middle (and the boobs too!) Weirdly enough, I haven't lost too much in the boobs this time around. And I think my legs are a little thinner. Anyway, just taking this picture tonight has made me realize that it is a good thing. It isn't just something that isn't noticable. My husband said that I seem the same as always. He says that I was perfect before. As nice as this is, I wanted to hear that I seem different. Look different. I WANT to look different. I think I DO.

It isn't about the weight, it really isn't. It is about feeling good and being healthy. Now if I can stay off the scale....

I'm off to study, goodnight!!!!

Winter is here to stay

2007-12-05T12:33:00.000-08:00

The snow fell all day Sunday, and all day Tuesday. It has turned into winter wonderland here. And as pretty as it looks, to me it is the start of the long, frigid winter. I do enjoy a nice snowfall, and don't even mind the chilly temps. It is when it gets to be 0 degrees or less every morning and I don't just want to start the car, I have to start the car in the mornings. I seriously have to start the car at least 15 min before going anywhere for it to be remotely lukewarm inside, and for the windows to be clear of ice and snow. This time of year also means tons of snow gear for the kids. And it all comes home from school wet and cold. And did you know it is really hard to get boots and gloves dry over night? I have to either come up with a better solution or else find a new kind of boots and gloves. B's boots, especially, are soaking wet. There is no liner I can remove to dry. My solution is to put them by the heating vents and hope for the best. I do this with gloves also. Many mornings, they are still damp. I have dried the gloves in the drier but it says not to on the tag. Maybe I'm buying the wrong kind. I don't know. I have to hang the coats and snowpants each day also. There is also the stuffing of the backpacks, with lunches, shoes to change into, snowpants if they aren't wearing them, folders, library books, snacks and everything else. Can you tell this time of year is a big change for us??? Granted, I am enjoying the holiday spirit and the excitement of the kids over a big snow outside. I am not a big outdoor person when it comes to snow. I will sit out all day in the summer but I don't like to sit out in the cold snow. But winter is here and there is nothing I can do but accept it! :)

Not much else going on with me. I am trying to get done with this semester so I can enjoy a couple weeks off. I am getting close to done with my Xmas shopping. I have the kids presents wrapped even. I got my new purse and can't decide if I like it. If anything, it was free. It is not one I would pick out but maybe I can get some use out of it. I'll try to post a pic:

ok, I think it posted at the top of this post. oh well. I also put in a pic of the kids by the tree. The purse I won is the bronze colored one in front. The other one is my favorite knock off purse that I use all the time. The new one has a big "G" on the front that looks like the green bay packers "G" but I guess is supposed to be for "Guess" brand. It is a little big and shiny I think. The color is ok kind fo a bronzy brown, it looks kind of metallic. And lots of silver things on it, but maybe it would look ok with the right outfit. My guess is that it was up for a drawing for a reason (like, no one wanting to buy it!) The price tag said $45. I would have never paid that much.

The tree is up and won something

2007-12-01T17:34:00.000-08:00

We finally got our decorations out, including the fake tree. Unfortunately we aren't getting a real tree this year, for a few reasons.
#1 - we are trying to cut down on spending, and real trees are $40 at the least
#2 - we are leaving within a few days of Christmas on a road trip (12 hr) to see my new nephew, brother and sister in law
#3 - we have a fake tree and haven't used it in the past 5 years at least
I was a little discouraged that I didn't get my real tree. I love the smell of a real tree. But after I got over it, I realized it looks pretty good and whether or not I have a real tree won't really change Christmas for anyone involved. Plus, the brances are strong enough to hold all of our heavy ornaments, so that is a plus. I decorated the house as much as I'm going to this year. Some years I go all out (non-nursing school years) and others I do simple but still festive. I did teh tree, mantle and a few other odds and ends. The kids collect nutcrackers so we proudly display them each year, adding at least 1 new one per kids every year. We have a total of 8 this year. I usually let them pick a new one out AFTER Christmas when they are 50% off. J even has some girly ones, a princess and a girl holding a doll nutcracker. So cute. B loves the big ones wearing their fancy costumes. We saw the neatest one dressed in army camoflauge. But it was $12.99 so we passed and hope it will be on clearance later.

Anyway I must be going but I have to add that I won a drawing at a purse party I went to last night and won a free handbag!! I had gone to the open house to buy my mom a handbag for her birthday. I wanted so badly to buy one (or more) for myself, but I didn't. I held back due to a conversation with DH about finances. I had 2 that I really loved but was proud I didn't give in to the temptation. I got my mom a nice conservative black purse that she seemed to really like. As I left the host had me fill out my name on a sheet for a drawing for a free purse. To tell you the truth I don't really remember what the purse looked like but the hostess assures me it is cute. I can't believe I won. I told DH that it is good I didn't buy anything because I would have felt guilty if I bought one then won one also! So, I'll let you know how it looks when I get it. I already have 2 knockoff purses that I really use a lot.

The snow has been falling all day. It is beginning to look a lot like Christmas around here.

The christmas present dilema

2007-11-27T20:50:00.000-08:00

I love to buy presents. Not just for my kids, but for my family and friends too. But especially the kids. I love finding that one (or 2 or 3) thing that really want and watching them open it and be so excited. I love going to the store and finding something for someone that I know they will love. However, I really never know when to stop. How many gifts should a 5 and 7 yr old receive? I don't think I typically go overboard. My parents buy them one nice gift (or 2). Their other grandma buys them a couple nice gifts. Then I get them a couple from us and a couple from santa and some small games/stocking stuffers/DVD's. Every year I tend to think I'm getting them too much. That is isn't needed. How do you know??? I remember running into a mom I know from B's school last year at the store, she was alone doing her christmas shopping. Granted, she has 3 kids but her cart was FULL to the brim. Loaded with toys, games, DVD's, books. She had so much stuff in there I was a little shocked. But maybe that is typical. Then I have a good friend who buys her boys one big thing from her and her husband, and one big thing from Santa. That's it. This year they will get a WII from them, and a WII game and controllers from Santa. Typically it is something big like a video game system or big toy they have been eyeing all year. However, I know she buys the kids things year round and I tend not to do that unless my kids have money they have earned or received from someone. I do not give them money just to buy toys. Yes, I buy them a small thing here and there (jewerly, lip gloss, trading cards, $1 items) but I would never buy them a new doll or a lego set for no reason. So, how much do you buy your kids for the holidays and how much is too much? We do many other activities related to christmas that are not gift related. We donate to families in need, do a shoebox for a child in need, make lots of christmas crafts and treats, buy special gifts for other family members, decorate, advent calendar, church activities etc etc. So, I'm not really worried about the presents being the main focus but I do sometimes worry about how much is too much. Maybe I shouldn't worry so much but I do. I don't want my kids to be spoiled, even though it seems inevitable.

HAPPY THANKSGIVING! Drove 10 hours, slept poorly, ate too much (gained only 1 lb) and went shopping

2007-11-26T08:04:00.000-08:00

We made our yearly treck to the in laws for thanksgiving. A grand time was had by all. I hardly talked to the kids they were so busy playing with their cousins. I didn't enjoy the drive or the sleeping, but I had a good time. My mother in law makes so much food. I had turkey, potatoes, stuffing, gravy, cheesy potatoes (my fave), and of course lots of sweets. I was happy to find out I only gained 1 lb over the weekend. I am back home exercising and eating well again. Did you know the average American gains 7 lb over the holidays??? Wow.

Anyway, I ended up going shopping on Friday. I got up at 6:30 and was out the door by 7am. The stores opened up anywhere from 4am - 6am so I wasn't there for the doors opening. I went to Target first and found some scooters I wanted for the kids. My mother in law is going to give them for Xmas gifts. I also found a bunch of DVD's to give as gifts. Then I was off to a few other stores. I ended up finding the boy Baby Alive doll that J wants to badly. I guess in IA they have them and up here in MN we don't. They are still going for really high prices on Amazon and Ebay so I got a good deal and was so happy to find this darn doll. She better love it. I think I am done shopping for J. She will get the doll from my parents. I got her some doll outfits, a CD player, 3 CD's, a Leapster with 2 games, and 2 DVD's. I may buy a couple books to add in there and she will be done. However, I am not sure what to get B. My parents got him a DS which he desperately wants. I got him a game to go with it and a board game called Heroscape. It is a new version of one he already has, and he loves it. It has all these tiny battle figures. It is a complicated game but we play our own version. I also got him 2 DVD's. I will also get him books and I really should get him one more present. I am not sure what though. He does not ask for much. I also am done for DH, and still have to get something for most of the grandparents. It never seems to be quite done. I enjoy finding the perfect gift, and love to shop (much to my husband's dismay). I also love a good deal.

I am invited to yet another party this Fri, a purse party. Maybe I'll buy the grandma's a new purse, depending on prices and how cute they are. I always love a new purse but I really don't want to spend the money on myself.

I am home today with J and B went back to school. I have class tonight and wed. I have a big assignment/presentation to do wed then a test in a couple weeks. Then I'm done with semester 3 of 4. YAY!

Black Friday

2007-11-21T07:22:00.000-08:00

I'm debating going shopping on Black Fri this year. I usually don't. I don't like getting up early, and I don't like crowds. Plus, we are always out of town for Thanksgiving. I am thinking of getting up and going while at the in laws this week. There are a few things that are good deals that I want to buy. But is it worth the hassle to get a good deal?? On my list so far are DVD's for everyone in the family, razor scooters for the kids (I think my kids are the only ones that don't have one of these and they are going to be $18 at Target), board games, new PJ's for the kids, and clothes for some family gifts. I also was looking at some other things for myself of course! I can't decide the best places to go, and what time I should get up. I am NOT getting up at 3am to be at the stores that open by 4am. I would be willing to get up at 6am. Should I go?

Other than that, I have a test tonight, and plan to study a lot today. I really have to do well to keep my possibility of an A alive. I also have not packed at all for leaving early tomorrow. I am hoping my husband will do some of that today (he has the day off work). I hate the packing part of traveling. I do like that the kids are getting old enough to travel well in the car for 5 hr.

Have a great thanksgiving!

Lucky jeans?

2007-11-18T21:06:00.000-08:00

OK, I know the younger crowd likes Lucky brand jeans. We got a new Lucky outlet store at the huge outlet mall 10 min away so I decided to try it out. Still searching, you know, for those great jeans. Anyway, I had heard you could get a $100 pair for $30. Sounded great to me. I first found out that they are by waist size but also have a regular size inside. I started trying some on and found that depending on the type, wore anything from a 4/27 to an 8/29. Why would the same brand have such a big difference??? Maybe that is why these were at the outlet store, but I didn't find anything I was overly impressed with. I then saw some colored jean type pants for $19 and ended up getting a pair of those. Again, they are low cut. Probably lower than I like. I like the look of low cut jeans, don't get me wrong, but some are just TOO low. But I had to get the 8's in those. I know it is just a number, but still. They are an army green color. I will try to take a picture soon. They are pretty cute I think. But not the perfect pair. They are something different than the usual blue jeans I buy so I feel good about that. Now if they just stay up when I sit down or bend over. I will have to wear a long shirt with them.

Other news, I am done with clinical this semester!!! I had my last one yesterday. I feel stressed an tired out. I have a BIG test Wed, really great since the kids are off all week and I want to plan for thanksgiving. We are traveling out of town Thur. I want to enjoy the week and relax but that won't happen until after my test. I really want to do well. My clinical rotation went great. I was on a cardiac floor. I now do so many things that used to totally freak me out. I give injections all the time. I give insulin all the time. I hang IV meds, and I give IV push meds (this used to really scare me, some of the meds are pretty strong/scary). I juggle 2-3 patients at a time. I did an admission all alone yesterday. I really am starting to feel like a real RN, like I can really do this.

I am going to bed, I am exhausted. Good night!

Last day

2007-11-17T08:58:00.000-08:00

Today is my last clinical of fall semester. We still have a few weeks left of regular class but no more weekends. YAY! I am excited. The weekend is ending on a good note I hope, as I am leader and will get to oversee everyone else. Yesterday I had a crazy shift, my patient was in really critical condition and eventually got transferred to the ICU. I had another patient who, thank goodness, didn't need much. I spent most of the shift in one room draining and attempting to stop bleeding that wouldn't stop. I hope he is doing ok. He was only 54 and didn't speak English. Really tough.

We are having a potluck for the nurses, I have my meatballs in the crockpot. We gave our instructor a nice card and small gift last night. We have our last care plans of the semester to write by Wed, and a test Wed night. I am really nervous about the test. Plus, the kids are home all week so I have to try to get lots of studying in while also keeping them busy and happy. Then we are off to the in-laws for Thanksgiving on Thur-Sat.

Can't believe it is already the holidays!

DH went to J's conferences yesterday and she is doing GREAT. She is above average in everything she needs to know. I was a little worried as she is so young but so far she is doing wonderful. I am so proud of her. I have B's conferences on Tuesday.

I am off to spend a few min with the family before my shift.

Mineral Foundations?

2007-11-13T11:59:00.001-08:00

Does anyone know anything about mineral foundation/makeup? I have been thinking about this since I saw a Bare Essentials starter kit at Cost*co the other day. I am thinking about having my mom buy it for me (she has a membership). I have been reading up on the different brands and some people love it, some don't. I tend to break out and have oily/normal skin. I would love something that would cover my skin flaws and not be greasy/shiny looking. I found a website
http://www.everydayminerals.com/
that gets good reveiws also. I ordered the free sample kit (you have to pay shipping of $3.75). So, does anyone out there use these?? Let me know what you think??

Is there such thing as the perfect pair of jeans?

2007-11-07T20:29:00.000-08:00

Now that the cold weather is here to stay, I am back wearing jeans every day (well sometimes sweats if I am feeling unmotivated). I have been searching my whole life for a perfect pair of jeans. Ones that are comfortable #1, but also look great. It may help if I had even paid more than $20 on a pair. But I am willing to go above that limit a little bit if I could get a great pair that I love. Currently I do not have a lot of jeans that fit me. Current weight loss has made most of my jeans too loose. I am not ready to get rid of them, as they still kind of fit they are just a little baggy. I have 2 pairs that I got at G*A*P outlet for $14.99 each a couple months back. For one, what is the thing with stores putting smaller sizes on jeans. Does it really make people feel skinnier? I know that the size I bought are not the size they say. It is like they are moving the sizes up (what once was a 9 is now labled a 7). Anyway, that is besides the point I guess. I rarely go to malls, but I am willing to try. I mainly shop at the outlet mall or K*ohls. I am not big on Tar*get clothes. Many times I buy a pair of jeans and after wearing them I realized they are too low cut and I am hiking them up all day. I also tend to buy really boring jeans. I mean plain pockets and nothing interesting about them. I am totally not into jewels or anything on them, but maybe a little something on the pocket or just something with a little more sex appeal?? I am bored of my boring wardrobe and want to spice things up without breaking the bank. Any suggestions?

Halloween already???

2007-10-30T19:21:00.000-07:00

This is really unlike me but I just got out the halloween stuff yesterday! So, today was a frantic, get in the halloween mood day for me and the kids. Tomorrow we have halloween parties at school and then trick or treating at night. B is gone so I have to skip school to take the kids out. Not a huge deal (I hope, we'll see on the next test). I have never skipped class, EVER, since going back to college. I am such a goody-goody! I am feeling really guilty about it but I would feel more guilty not being with my kids on a holiday they love so much.

Today we decorated the house a little bit, made BOO bags for 4 neighbors, carved pumpkins, and roasted pumpkin seeds. I made cupcakes this past weekend to frost and decorate, but those aren't going as fast as I thought. We will probably give some away to neighbors.

I finished my paper from hell and am now looking forward to a busy clinical weekend. They aren't that bad when I am there but the anticipation and the time away from home is hard. And the paperwork, can't forget that. I usually have 3 patients so that means 3 careplans due the Wed after. Lots of typing, but I have to admit I am getting faster at putting the careplans together. Last year I couldn't imagine taking care of 3 patients and doing all the paperwork. Now I know it is do-able and I am doing ok with it. I got an A on my last test but I am still going to have to work really hard to get an A in the class since I got a low B on my first test. I will work my hardest and if I end up with a B I end up with a B. I will be ok. It will be ok. Right?

I am off to exercise then to bed, without studying tonight. Bad girl that I am!

One day at a time

2007-10-26T20:03:00.000-07:00

That is how I try to do it, take it one day at a time and eventually you get where you need to go. I hate to wish time away but I really look forward to school being done. I really want to NOT study anymore!! I want to be able to work part time and come home and not do any extra reading or homework. Sounds so nice! But things are going well. I feel I do pretty good at keeping a balance. I spend quality time with my family. It isn't always enough quantity for me, but we have to get by. I miss B the most as he is in school every day and 2-3 of those days I leave for my school by 5pm. So, I see him about 1.5 hr those days. I have been going in to volunteer at his school just to see him more and for him to know that I think school is important. This weekend I am home all weekend and plan to spend a lot of time with both kids. B is also really into friends so some days after school he wants to play with friends, rather than spend time with me. And I totally understand that, but still I miss the days when I had them to myself all day every day (even though I went crazy many of those days!) I have realized when they go to school, it opens up a whole new door for them. It is a good thing, but it still is a big change. They find a social life and friends and other interests. They are no longer just YOURS they have their own little life outside of the home. Crazy how fast they grow.

Tonight we went to the fall festival at church, where B won bingo and J won at the cakewalk. Made their day. We then went out to family dinner and I ate way too much. Tomorrow we have a halloween party at a good friend's house, and J has cheerleading camp in the morning. Hopefully it will go better than dance. She claims she really wants to to go and being in the morning with no school before "should" help a lot. We will see. It is 2 Saturdays in a row for 2 hr each. Her little friend down the road is going also. Wish us luck.

I have a big paper due Monday but I'm not too stressed about it. It is an OB teaching guide so I really know most of what I'm reading already. It is more fun for me than work, although tedious. I still really love OB nursing even thought I will probably gravitate towards something more along the lines of critical care. I may pursue OB nursing someday. I would love to get my lactation consultant certification someday. But my heart really lies in the fast paced environments such as ER or ICU. I started out my journey wanting to be an OB nurse/midwife, funny how life changes as you are on the path you started. And possibly my path will still end up there. Who knows. I am so open to whatever comes my way and we will see.

I applied for a preceptorship through school, so we'll see if I get one. I'd really like to do one, for the experience and to get more hands on time in the hospital.

I am going to get a little more of my paper done before bed!

Head exploding

2007-10-17T20:04:00.000-07:00

I just have this lingering cold thing I can't shake. It isn't so bad that I'm not functional, but it sure isn't fun. I have the sinuse pressure and itchy eyes. Just really congested feeling. It is only October and I had a stomach thing-y ing in Sept and this now. It isn't even cold/flu season. I guess my good health last year is not going to be my luck this year. I called to get an appointment for a flu shot next week. I usually get one and it is even more important now that I'm in the hospital frequently for school. I also am taking the kids in to get one. They are not going to be happy with me, but they need to have it. I know B will be brave but J will start crying as soon as we pull in the parking lot. She already cried once just asking me if she was getting one. That child. She walked home today from school, and came in and said "I'm exhausted". Too funny, that girl. I had a really boring night at school. Cost me $25 for a sitter since my husband is gone for work until tomorrow. I am burned out with school. I know I am. I do not want to spend time studying and writing papers and doing projects. I want to sit and watch TV for just one night. I want to rent a movie and just sit there for 3 hours doing nothing. I want to go to bed at 9pm without feeling guilty. I know I can do this, but I just don't want to!!! On that note, I better study a bit for my test before bed...... goodnight!

what would you do?

2007-10-16T20:09:00.000-07:00

J has been in dance for like a month. She seemed to like it ok at first. Nothing she would talk about a lot or anything but she went and didn't complain. Well, the last few times she has had crying spells at dance. I am outside and she can see me and she will just start crying when she looks at me. Last time she would not stop (could not stop). And we had to stay because I had driven the neighbor girl. It was terrible (for me, her, her brother, everyone) she was saying "I can't stop crying" She tried to go back in twice and disrupted the class. It is not anything she can explain. So, I am debating even going back. It is $40/month and truthfully I am not a big fan of the whole dance thing anyway. She says she doesn't want to be in dance. Her reason is that she likes it but she can't stop crying and doesn't want to go anymore. She wants to play basketball when she is 6. She says she does not want to play sports this year. One thing that I am thinking is that 6.5 hr of school and then dance almost immediately after is just too much for her little body/mind to handle in one day. And she wants down time, not dance time. Another thing is maybe dance isn't for her. I don't want to be a quitter but I don't want to pay for something she does not like. It isn't a short term dance, it is the whole year with a recital at the end, with costs for costumes, pictures, recital fees, tickets etc. It is a lot of money. If it was a 6 week class I would make her finish but it isn't something that has an end in sight. I really thought she would love dance, but I guess I was wrong.

update

2007-10-16T19:27:00.000-07:00

Of course he made it through his day just fine. I know that if he wasn't fine, I'd get a call from the nurse at the school but still I worry. I can remember a few times as a kid when I would feel sick all day at school, not telling anyone (of course I never said a word to my teachers at school, I was a TAD bit shy, unlike my kids!) and I would be miserable all day. I have told my kids if they feel sick at all to tell someone. But he was running home from school, and I had gone up in the truck because it was raining and he didn't even want a ride from me.

Tonight J told me that she doesn't like it when it is "crowded" at school. She is talking about when they have to wash up for lunch and there are a few classes there at once. It does get a little crazy. I hope she doesn't get too bent out of shape about it. She has been doing so good, and likes school for the most part. The poor kindergarteners sometimes get overwhelmed by all the kids at lunch and recess. The lunchroom gets really loud and J is really sensory sensitive.
Her good friends got separated from their class after lunch on the way to recess and now cries every day going to school. Just a little thing can really traumatize a 5 year old. I pray nothing happens to make J not want to go.

I am studying and studying this week. I have a big test next Wed and since I have clinical this weekend I will not have any time to study all weekend. I have to do it this week. I got a "gasp" B on the last test so I'm really trying to get a better grade. It would not be the end of the world if I did get a B in this class but I want to keep my record. I put too much pressure on the score and should just focus on getting through. I also have a head cold so I do not want to stay up late and study, I want to sleep. I really want to exercise tonight also since I didn't have time today (had to sit for J's friend) but if I do it now I will be up really late.

I better make sure my kids are asleep. B is gone again this week :( but just until Thursday.

Do you ever have this problem

2007-10-16T08:05:00.001-07:00

Kid sick with low grade fever and headache. Keep him home from school. Wakes up saying he feels ok, send to school. Feel guilty/weird all day wondering if he is ok. I hate this. I hate having to send a kid to school a day after he was sick, but I know I can't just keep him home with no symptoms. I just hate winter and all the yucky sickness.

What I am thinking????

2007-10-09T21:03:00.001-07:00

I am having one of those weeks where I ask myself what the heck am I trying to do here? Why do I get myself into nursing school? Why am I working my behind off day and night to be a nurse??? I sometimes think I am CRAZY!!! What kind of person does this to themself? I had a decent job before. I made good money. I didn't love it, but I didn't hate it either. I talked myself into this nursing thing and now I'm just in over my head with work and reading and studying and doing careplans. I never even heard of careplans before last year. I know deep down that I will love my job when I am done. I will be so proud but dang, this is really hard. I have SO much to do. I am SO tired all the time.

I am trying to be a good mom, wife, and student all at once and it is really hard. The person who gets the least amount of attention is myself.

I have a lot to do but I am going to bed. It is 11pm and I was up until 1AM last night doing homework. I need some sleep. Here is my brief update.....

Dance tonight = not good. I won't go into details but I think school for 6.5 hr + dance = not a good situation. We might be dance drop outs very soon.

Football tonight = VERY cold. Hubby is gone so I had to stay the whole game with J, who does not like to be cold. We spent part of the game in the truck. It was so cold we had winter coats, hats, gloves, 3 layers plus blankets and we were still freezing. The wind was terrible. It was the last game whooo hooo!

Housework = terrible. The house is a mess. I have to do laundry, dishes, beds, floors, bathrooms, you name it. I hate being behind.

Weight loss and exercise = great. I am exercising most days except when I have clinicals (I'm on my feet those days anyway). I fit in all my skinny jeans and feel great.

Kids = cute but demanding. Fighting too much. Not always listening. Going to bed too late. But lovely as usual.

Husband = gone. anniversary coming up soon!

Me = extremely tired --- good night!

The fun continues

2007-09-26T20:27:00.000-07:00

Having 2 kids in school is really a lot of work. I know next year will be more since I'll have 2 kids in school full time. Part of the challenge is that my kids rarely will eat hot lunch. So, I continually packing lunches that I "hope" they will eat and trying new things that they might like, as they seem to tire of things easily. B is much more picky and will only eat hot lunch on days they have pancakes or french toast sticks. That happens maybe once a month. That is a lot of home lunches. J has eaten hot lunch 3 times already, more than B did his whole first year of school. She has a wider variety of things she likes and also will vary from routine a little more willingly than her brother. She actually LIKES to try new things. Unknown things. B does NOT like new things, he loves routine and likes to know exactly what he is supposed to do, in what order, every day. Once he is in the routine he is fine, but a little change, like getting hot lunch rather than bring a cold lunch, can be really stressful for him. He prefers me to come IF he happens to have hot lunch. Even thought he knows how to do it, he likes me there. Which is fine by me because in a couple years he will probably be embarassed if I come (not that it will stop me).

Anyway, other than the lunch packing, there is the clothes decision every day. Here in MN, at this time of year, the weather is really unpredictable. So, I can't really get their clothes out until it is morning and I can "test" the weather. Do they need pants? Long sleeves? Short sleeves with a jacket over, heavy or light jacket, even gloves on some days. Winter will be even worse because they have to wear: warm clothes, snowpants, winter jacket, boots, gloves, hat and scarf. Then they have to bring shoes and change in and out of winter gear about 4 times during the day. Talk about craziness! I love it really, though. I love seeing them grow and become so independent. They are SUCH good kids, and they are just so much fun.

Not much else is new. I am busy busy with school. Had my first test tonight. It was really hard. I had a psych clinical this past weekend. Wow, is all I can say. What an experience. I have so much to do it isn't even funny.

I am off to bed, after I get that load of laundry out of the dryer.

"my mom the ners"

2007-09-20T20:28:00.000-07:00

B brought home a paper he was doing in school, about me, and under job he wrote "ners". Is that the cutest??? And even moreso, in less than 9 months I hope to be able to have that RN after my name. I am still alive, for anyone still even checking this blog. I am buried in homework, clincals every other weekend, school 2 nights a week, volunteering for each kid in school (it is hard to get 2 kids off to school!) once a week, going to dance class, and going to football games. That doesn't count housework, laundry, grocery shopping, cooking, making lunches, and fitting in 30-40 minutes of exercise per day. I thought I'd have free time with every other day to myself for 6 hr. I can't say I've had any "down" time. I seem to have so much to do, that I never do anything really fun or relaxing for myself. Maybe next week after my first test I will actually get a haircut (badly needed) or something else "fun". I did buy like 4 pairs of shoes in the past 2 weeks, so I guess I can't say I haven't had ANY fun. I am feeling like my kids are growing SO fast. J is in kindergarten and she is such a big girl. She is an old pro at the school thing watching her brother go the past 2 years. B is in 2nd grade and reading like a pro. He is so smart and such a perfectionist. Anyway, I have a LONG weekend ahead of me. I am working in a locked psych unit at one of the biggest trauma units of the twin cities. I will be there fri evening for a few hours and during the day both Sat and Sun. I also have a test coming up on Wed next week, along with all my clinical paperwork. I will have time for nothing other than school work and trying to spend a little time with my family. After Wed, I will have the next weekend off and plan to do something really fun with the kids. Maybe do an apple orchard if the weather permits. I just love fall. Anyway, I am off to bed. Gotta get that sleep while ya can!

Bret

2007-08-19T19:08:00.001-07:00

Since I wrote about J, I really have to be fair and write about my sweet boy. My 7 year old, that makes me sound so old. He is going into 2nd grade and shortly after this picture was taken lost both of his front top teeth. He looks so different. I just love his smile and when he tells me he is having a "laugh attack". He had one tonight playing games with J and I. He is more like me, more serious and reserved. He isn't a big risk taker, but will do anything with guidance. He likes to know what is expected and what will happen and then he is game to try new things. He also loves to swim and can swim the length of a medium sized pool. He is a wrestler and baseball player. He is starting football tomorrow. Can you believe, football for 2nd graders? He looks so cute in all his pads. He thinks his "nut cup" is hilarious. He has a love/hate relationship with his sister. They get along great at times and she bugs him at times. I would like to see more love and less hate but in time I think that will come. I let them sleep together tonight in J's new big kid bed (full size). I haven't let them do that before so we will see how that goes. DH is out of town and they only have a couple weeks left of summer so I thought "what the heck". I better go check to see if they are sleeping. My boy is growing up so fast!!!!

Jenna

2007-08-19T18:55:00.000-07:00

My daughter is a very big personality inside a little bitty body. I sometimes look at her and wonder how lucky I got, and sometimes I wonder what God saw in me that made him think I could handle her! I am challenged by this child daily. She has such a wild spirit, and is so unlike me that I sometimes do not know what to do. She just turned 5 years old and is ready to take on the world. She does not like anyone to help her do anything. She is fiercely independent but still wants me close by. She has emotions that run wild. Sometimes she will react in a way that is so unexpected that I am clueless. There are times that I can barely hold it together but I truly love this wild child more than I can imagine. I am a very introverted, shy and reserved person. As I child I rarely spoke unless spoken to. I was not very physical and I definately did not do anything risky. Jenna will do anything. She would do anything by herself. She gets downright mad when she is too short to ride on a carnival ride. She loves everything fast and scary. Loves rollercoasters, go carts, you name it she will try it. One thing she also loves is water. She has no fear of water whatsoever. She has had swimming lessons a number of times but still cannot really float or swim at all. She, however, has no problem jumping into water over her head and hoping someone will rescue her. This scares me to death. I fear that she will do this when someone is not around. We have told her countless times that she must be with an adult at all times. She must never just jump in a pool, even if we are there, unless she tells us she is jumping in. I don't know what to do about this problem. If we are in the boat, she has a life jacket on and has never jumped in alone. In pools she jumps in all over but we are always in the water. It only takes one time for her to choose to do something she shouldn't and with her personality it makes me scared that she could do this. We have also worked on her with her swimming and floating but she is far from knowing how to swim at all. I just pray we will always keep her safe from herself because she is my little firecracker. I have heard of 2 child drowings lately and so it makes me think about my little girl and how I don't know what I would do without her. Keep your babies close to you and hold them tight!

quickie

2007-08-19T16:15:00.000-07:00

The 2 kids are in the bath together so this will be random and quick. I am done working, and gearing up for school. I start next weekend. The kids start after labor day. I got J's class list and the one kid who I would NOT want to be in her class is. Out of 4 classes, he is in hers, which sucks but what can ya do. I sure hope he is not going to cause problems. The nice thing about school is that they can send him to the office. In preschool, they didn't have that option. There are 2 girls she knows from preschool and I'm sure she will meet many new friends. We will get B's class assignment at open house next week. B starts football this week and DH is out of town. I don't have any big plans other than let the kids have some playdates here before school starts, got to football practice, and go to open lab at my school (make sure I know all my skills before the weekend when we do them in lab). I also have to buy a lab coat for our prep days, buy my books, look over my math conversions for our test next monday, and study up on my skills. I have to remember how to do a catheter, NG, IV, meds, injections, and vital signs. I did some of these during my internship but not all. I am kind of ready for the kids to be back at school. I probably should get J some new shoes (B's still fit from last year and look pretty good). I also need to get lunch stuff when it gets closer. Neither kid will eat hot lunch much so I will be busy making those darn lunches every morning. I think we got all the school supplies and backpacks. Kids are yelling for me, so gotta run!

Twin Cities Nightmare

2007-08-02T14:55:00.000-07:00

I am still in shock about the terrible bridge collapse we had here in my home state. I do not live or drive that far into the city very often, but I have driven over this bridge and it is so scary just because it is one of those things that you never believe will happen. It is something you would never even think while you are driving over a bridge. Something I will think every time I drive over a bridge in the future. We have had 24 hr coverage here today, and I found out that even the TODAY show was in Minneapolis covering their story. I hope you all hug your loved ones a little bit longer today. 20-30 people are still missing, and many cars are in the river. Recovery efforts are going on right now, and my heart is with the families of the missing and those who are hurt or who have died due to this disaster.
http://www.comcast.net/news/index.jsp?cat=GENERAL&fn=/2007/08/02/730092.html

HELLO!

2007-07-30T16:00:00.000-07:00

I am alive. Yes, I am supposed to be having a relaxing summer but with work, kids, house, travelling, and trying to fit in summer fun at the beach we are out an about much of the day. We are busy this week with VBS and football camp. Signed J up for dance this fall, and we are busy shopping for school supplies for both kids. Very busy! Hope to get an update up soon.

So sorry.

2007-07-01T12:40:00.000-07:00

Boy, I'm a great blogger huh? No wonder I don't have many readers! Ha! I am waking up right now at 2:30 pm, why you might ask? I worked the last 2 nights, overnight 12 hours, and I due to work again tonight. It is really tiring but I'm making it. This internship has changed our lives this summer and I'm learning a lot. It is hard to adjust and working again has it's ups and downs but overall, I really am learning so much and enjoying the patients and hospital. I am getting to do a lot of stuff and it will really help in clinicals next year. Plus, I am getting paid. I am actually making money, something I haven't done in almost 5 years. It feels good. I like contributing to our family. The kids are adjusting fine to daycare a couple days a week. They haven't complained once. I think they were actually ready to do something like this. It keeps things interesting and they have kids to play with their. Even my J, who is attached to my hip most days, is doing great and I'm so proud of both of them. I have 6 weeks left then I will be back to being a student rather than an employee, but this time next year I will probably be starting a new job (unless I take the summer off first - very tempting!)

Other than that, our summer is going fast and has been fun. We have been spending quality family time together and loving it. My kids are at such a great age. I love it. They are my little companions and my best buds. We have our moments but I really am so lucky.

I am off to get something to eat upstairs and wait for the rest of my family to get home. Sorry about the no posting lately!!

Tomorrow I enter the working mom world

2007-06-03T17:00:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow I will be at WORK, can you believe it. It won't be a huge change as I've been a student forever and had to carve out time for that. This way I will go to work and not have homework when I get home! YAY! I have orientation for the first few days and one day of shadowing and then this coming weekend I will be working as an intern with my preceptor (nurse mentor/teacher). I am hoping that she is nice. I would think most preceptors would be, but that can make or break the whole experience. I am excited to do this, I know I will learn so much and be ahead of things starting next year in school. It will help me greatly in getting a great job after graduation. Our instructor told us that pretty much 100% of people who intern get a job before graduation. That was good to hear. Even if there are a ton of nursing jobs out there, any edge to get the job I want will help. I also ran into a nurse friend at a restaurant last night and she said she would precept me spring semester (as a 2nd year student we have an opportunity to do a preceptorship for a few weeks rather than clinicals if we find a nurse who will take us and we have the other qualifications). I am excited she said she would do it, since I get along with her, she has been a nurse for a long time and I think would be a great teacher, and she works in ICU = great experience to get before graduation. I will get to do a ton of things in ICU and unless I find another area I really want to do my preceptorship in, I will most likely do it with her. I do know some other nurses I could ask and may see what other options are out there but it is nice to have that in the back of my mind.

I am feeling like I am coming down with something so I'm going to put J to be (B is at baseball practice) and take a nice bath before bed.

Not another diet post

2007-05-21T13:07:00.000-07:00

I won't make this about a diet or losing weight. Someone had posted a comment about getting an update, and well as you know I was all discouraged because throughout the school year I ended up gaining back the weight I had lost over last summer. It amounted to about 8-10 lb. From my very lowest last summer to what I was a couple weeks ago about 10 lb but I had a very hard time staying at my very lowest weight. Anyway, of course with the end of school and the start of nice weather I am again optimistic about fitting in my small clothes that I got last summer! The never ending roller coaster of my life. :) I am not upset. I am not mad. It is just how it is. I get stressed and I eat more. I don't exercise like I should and when it is cold and snowy and below zero degrees I do not walk outside. It's the facts. I wish I could say I'd never do it again (the roller coaster-ing) but I can't promise anything. I can only try my best. I am walking at least every other day, if not more. I am even JOGGING half of my 3 miles. Yes, me, jogging. I don't job. I hate it. I can't do it. At least that is what I told myself. But I did it, am doing it. I eat right. I don't binge eat hardly ever anymore. I limit sweets and try to drink a lot. I am doing my best and hopefully I can continue.

Dance vs. Gymnastics

2007-05-16T11:50:00.000-07:00

J is almost 5. Her brother is active in wrestling, baseball (previously soccer), and will play football in the fall. We are always going to his activities and cheering him on. J has had her share of activities, but not too many. She is in soccer now once a week, and has done some community ed gymnastics classes that I haven't been overly fond of. So, I feel that it is time to sign her up for a real sport/activity. I feel like she doesn't get much out of the community ed classes, the teachers are basically high school kids who can't control the little kids. They do the same thing every time and it seems a little boring. She loves going, don't get me wrong, but I want her to get something out of it, and I think at this age she really could get something out of a class. So, I'm debating dance vs. gymnastics. I think if I asked her she would say both, and probably if she had to choose would have a hard time. Every part of me wants her to say gymnastics. I am so not a dance proponent, especially little girls in those crazy outfits, with the curlers and the makeup. Sure, I let my girl dress up and she has her fair share of lip gloss but I just would prefer she do gymnastics. I never did either as a kid (my parents weren't big fans of dance either) and I so want her to have that option. I think she would be really good at gymnastics. She is small and strong, and if she takes after her dad's side (which both kids seem to when it comes to growth) she will probably stay on the petite side. However, I did get a flyer about a dance studio in town which seems to have decent prices. She can take ballet and tap once a week. I'm thinking any gymnastics club around here will cost an arm and a leg to join and plus we don't have one in town. Convenience means a lot when you are as busy as we are! How did you decide?

Thankful

2007-05-16T07:55:00.000-07:00

Did you know studies have shown that it is nearly impossible to be stressed and thankful at the same time? It's true. I have been focusing on being thankful for everything I have in my life. To cherish the little things. Be in the moment.

I am thankful for my 6:30 wakeup by J running in my room

I am thankful for my bedtime talks with B

I am thankful for my husband's hard work financially supporting our family, my school, the kids activities, and everything else that costs SO MUCH MONEY

I am thankful for the sun shining

I am thankful for my health, my family's health, my friend's health. So many do not have their health and so many take it for granted. It could be gone in an instant

I am thankful for the food that we have each meal

I am thankful for my beautiful home

I am thankful for our 2 cars that get us where we need to go

I am thankful for teachers to are second mothers to my kids

I want to wake up each day and feel thanks. Less than 1% of the world lives like I do. We have more food than we need each day, we have a home with a bedroom for each child. We have 2 cars. We have more clothes than we need. The kids have toys surrounding them. The majority of the world does not live this way. Children die every day from starvation and sickness. They do not get immunizations to protect them from deadly illnesses. They do not have a toy. They maybe get one meal a day, if that. Our society always wants more, needs more, buys more. We live in our little bubble and I hope that someday there will be enough food and toys for every child.

Are all self tanners created equal?

2007-05-15T13:55:00.000-07:00

I have been known to be pretty tan in the summer. I have a darker complexion naturally so I am actually tan year round. But in the summer I get really tan. However, this summer I am determined to be better about using sunscreen on my entire body. I need to start protecting my skin, especially after my mole scare a few weeks back. I know I'm not at high risk for skin cancer, but it can happen and does happen a lot. It typically hits young people, and is a very unforgiving kind of cancer to get. So, in order to protect my skin, the only skin I have, I am going to use sunscreen. In the past I have been good about using it on my face, shoulders, chest, etc. Anything that is prone to burning. But usually not on my legs at all, or my arms. So, in order to keep a tan appearance I invested in some self tanner. I have used some in the past but not regularly once I get the natural sun tan. I have been using it this week, and seems to be working. They have come a long way from the orange dye type lotions. I am using a cheapy brand from Target, but what do you recommened? I have used Jergens and Neutrogena so far. I have also used Mary Kay in the past. Never used the expensive department store brands and not sure I want to spend that much money on lotion.

I got a few summer things for myself today. A pair of shorts and capris, 2 pairs of flip flops, 2 t-shirts. Nothing too exciting, just basics that I will use to exercise and go to the beach. I don't dress up in the summer. I like to wear sporty type outfits that I can go for a long walk in or take a bike ride in. I also like stuff I can wear over swim suits. I got a couple cotton knit dresses to wear over my swim suits also a few weeks ago. Those are always comfy.

DH is gone for a couple days so I'm home alone with the kids, it is dreary and cold today and J isn't feeling well so we may skip soccer tonight. She says her throat hurts. I have no homework (yay) so not sure what I'll do after kids are asleep. Don't even have a book to read. Not even sure what is on TV Tues nights. Maybe I'll organize scrapbook stuff, or try to find something on TV. I only watch TV Thur nights (Grey's Anatomy, Survivor, ER).

Better make dinner for the kiddos and get a glass of wine for me!

Relief!

2007-05-15T06:49:00.000-07:00

I am done! YAY! I got a 94 on my last final, for a final grade of an A. I am really relieved about that. As much as you hear grades don't matter, I still want to get A's. This was supposedly the hardest semester so I am happy with the outcome. I have to say my first year of nursing school was unlike anything I Have ever done. It taught me so many thing about myself and about nursing. I am such a different person now. I know so much more. In some weird way I look forward to next year and finishing up my education (at least this part of it!) Some of us went out after class for a few drinks and then I came home and immediately checked my grade. I could miss 16 to still keep my A so I was pretty sure I did that, but I was still eager to see. I always leave tests not really sure how I did. I never have a good idea of what I got. I was really happy.

So, now on to summer and work and play and kid time and family time and all that jazz. I don't have to study for 3 months!!! Even if I'm working, I will have much more free time. No worrying about tests and papers and presentations. I hope to enjoy the moments of summer this year before they are gone.